Do you think confidence improves with age?

[~Emmsybabes~]

Well , what it say's in the title :lol:
with all the confidence boosting going on lately (most of it to me lol :hug: )
i was wondering do you think it improves with age generally ?
i know some people are born confident..
with me , i am a lot more confident now then even up until about 3 years ago ,
i would never ever disagree with anybody ,
i wouldnt open my mouth if i thought something
i never wanted to draw attention to myself , i wanted everyone to like me , i had very low self esteem , if anyone corrected me i would feel stupid.

whereas over the last few years i have noticed a change so much , for example in school i would never put my hand up if i knew an answer, i would always back out of any reading out loud ...hated drama, p.e ect...anything that involved putting myself in peoples faces ..

but now in college ...the hand go's straight up if i need to know something , i talk in group discussions , or most of the time start them lol
ill disagree if i have to ..and found I have a temper wooohooo (never knew i had one of them for a long time)
if i am corrected , i appreciate it now.and i liked to be liked , but i wont lose sleep if im not !

i find its always the younger girls who dont say a word , and us older ones who ask all the questions or offer the advice etc....

so what are your oppinions on this wether you are younger or older :green:

(if i have waffled slightly again , its coz i should be in bed now ..naughty naughty geeky !:smack: )

 

[Tiger Jay]

Waffle away Emms! I don't mind!!

Yeh I do think that confidence comes with age. The reason being that as you learn more you become more confident IMO. This goes for everything in life.

The only reason why we suffer with lack of confidence is when we are unsure of ourselves, whether we are doing the right thing. As we get older, we realise that the trivial things in life really don't matter, and we concentrate on what does.
Sometimes it puts us up against a brick wall when we don't know how to deal with something, but as we learn we become more confident.
And confidence, I believe, comes with time.

 

[Sparklepink]

i can be very confident in some situations but sometimes if there are ppl louder or something i tend to be the quiet one.,... i know this isnt always the case (and definitely nt if ive had a voddy or 2..lol)

i do have major self esteem issues with belief in what i can achieve sometimes... but then i also have the wee drive going on to push me further .... man this sounds soooo contradicting!...lol

i also think that the support ive had has really helped me too

as i have got old i am more confident yes... definitely ......i think having a job where you deal with the public does help this immensely... and yes over the yrs i have learned so much (hey id like to think i still fit into the young category ) so i am still learning...

good thread hunnio

Jess
xox

 

[fifitrix]

I agree it does come with age and experience in life I think, there are those lucky people who are confident off the bat, but I was never one of them.

I found that my confidence shone through when I had kids, I would stand up and say no when normally i would have shut my mouth, I suppose it was the responsibility factor.

Don't get me wrong there are times when my confidence has been knocked but I'm at the stage now where I feel, knock me down and I'll get up up twice as confident. It's just life I think.

Do you think I need to go on Jeremy Kyle???????

 

[becca boo]

u know thats a good thought i dont think it always has to do with age but the person, the experence sometimes just the atmosphere and getting usto their products and techniques im 28 look like im 12 literally could pass as still in high school yet i teach hair, nails and esthetics i like to learn new things be critiqued (sp?) on what im doing wrong so i can become better at what i do teach my students new things different ways for the same thing have them open their own minds to what there is out there in the industry of their choice and not limit themselves they always ask q's and i encourage that do alot of 1 on 1... this became longer than i expected:irked: but yeah i think it depends sometimes i just wanna :smack: them but they make my job worth it

 

[Sassy Hassy]

I think there is a difference in confidence and cockiness. Some people are born plain cocky and speak their mind no matter what and aren't worried who they upset. Then there is confidence, when you feel in control of a situation and can handle it accordingly. As you get older you find that you have been in most situations so you have experience of life to fall back on and guide you through.

Me, well my ex husband managed to knock out all my confidence and self esteem and it has taken years for me to get it back, but I have thank the lord. But, I only speak up if I think the situation justifies it, otherwise I'm a "whatever" person and don't waste my energy!!!!

Lol, not sure if I really answered the question there, I guess as we get older we aren't so worried about wanting to be friends with everyone so probably speak our minds more!!!!

 

[estherlou]

i would say so, i wanted to be a beauty therapist from the time i was 15, but thought people would laugh and say how can she be a beauty therapist when she's not pretty herself, daft i know, now 11 years later i can finally say, hell yes i can be a beauty therapist and a good one too, and i'm comfortable in my own skin finally!!!

 

[geeg]

Knowledge is Power ... and I think the more knowledgeable one is (at any age) then the more confident one is at least in their own sphere.

Most people gain more knowledge as they grow older (hopefully) so it would follow that maturity brings confidence and one is more sure of oneself.

the more sure you are, the more successfull you are too and this in turn instills confidence.

 

[adelekeegan1]

I have found that I have gained confidence in some areas (years of experience helps) but in others it has lessened.

The difference is that as I have got older I can appear confident in situations where I am not and that is almost as good

 

[bubbabinks]

I was painfully shy when I was younger.
In my first full-time job at 16 I didnt speak to anyone for the first 2 months, only to say thank you or answer a question if really pushed.

I have noticed that over the past few years not only have I grown more confident I have also matured a lot.
I put it down to age and children, I came to the conclusion that I couldnt afford to be shy or they miss out.

It has also helped me that my husband has always been a very confident person and understands my shyness.
When we first moved in together I'm certain my neighbours thought I was rude as I didnt talk to them, but it wasnt that it was that I was shy and didnt know how to handle the situation.
I over thought everything, where as all it needed was a simple "hello".

I've grown in confidence so much I managed to be spray tanned in a bikini in front of my class mates last week, a couple of years ago I would have quit the course if I thought I would have to do that!

 

[geeg]

I've grown in confidence so much I managed to be spray tanned in a bikini in front of my class mates last week, a couple of years ago I would have quit the course if I thought I would have to do that!

I'd quit the course now if I had to do that ... so maybe I'm not so confident after all ... at least not in tha area!!

 

[Sassy Hassy]

I'd quit the course now if I had to do that ... so maybe I'm not so confident after all ... at least not in tha area!!

LMAO!!! Actually I guess I always was confident. When I was 3 I played Mary in the kindergarten nativity. Apparently I refused to sing with anyone else and sang Away in a Manger as a solo!!!!! However I have always been shy around new people and I've learned to overcome this by sheer bravado and pushing myself not to be, and acting!!!! You see I should have been on the stage, I'm a budding starlet!!!

 

[bubbabinks]

I'd quit the course now if I had to do that ... so maybe I'm not so confident after all ... at least not in tha area!!

I have to say I did ask the lecturer what it has to do with nails.
I understand that some techs do it as an extra service, but when you're doing a nail course it's a bit bizarre to just chuck in spray tanning.

I wont be doing it again though, not for me.:o

 

[oey]

I do believe that for alot of people that confidence does come with maturity in alot of situations but not all.

when I was younger I was a very confident person on the outside and that got me through a long way. As you grow older and more mature you get to appreciate that that confidence can sometimes do you as much harm as good if you arent confident on the inside, and I then came down with a big bang at age 32.

It has taken a few years to get my confidence back again, but I now use that confidence in a different way - with discretion in some situations too!

I hope! Please tell me if you think different!

 

[adelekeegan1]

LMAO!!! Actually I guess I always was confident. When I was 3 I played Mary in the kindergarten nativity. Apparently I refused to sing with anyone else and sang Away in a Manger as a solo!!!!! However I have always been shy around new people and I've learned to overcome this by sheer bravado and pushing myself not to be, and acting!!!! You see I should have been on the stage, I'm a budding starlet!!!

Yeah and I'm the Easter Bunny:green::green::green::green:

 

[Sassy Hassy]

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Yeah and I'm the Easter Bunny:green::green::green::green:

Well Suchard is my fave chocolate in that case!!!!

 

[1999judy]

As a child I was very shy but became more confident as I got older.
Now I am confident in myself and my work but there is always the odd thing that can make you feel less confident.
The trick is to learn from your mistakes and keep learning. Bear in mind that you never know it all, in any aspect of life.

 

[~Emmsybabes~]

i have really enjoyed reading all your replies thankyou xxx

some very good points made.
i agree that knowledge helps along with confidence, but also think you can have loads of knowlege and be very shy ..and not want to open your mouth for fear of embarrasment mabey .
i know my confidence grew when i started work in the local shop , at first i plastered a false smile on my face and always tried to make small talk with customers , i was so nervous.
and before i knew it , it was a genuine smile and i really enjoyed chatting away,
up until this point , i had spent almost 3 years in this area without speaking to a soul , due to old neighbours making me very weary of people...:irked:
this taught me how to hold a conversation with strangers,which i could never have done before .

also my kids yes, i had my first at the age of 16 and my second at 18, so i was still a child myself really , and would always let others tell me what i should and shouldnt be doing ,
then last year when i nearly smacked that horrible woman one , for picking on my daughter , i came out thinking "omg was that really me" i shocked myself .

now when i am not having one of my "off days" i am smiley and chatty and confident, with everyone :green:

ooh i have forgotten who said it , but i also thought , i shouldnt be going into beauty thearapy, as i am not "beautiful"
i thought people would say "you are a beauty therapist "
but then thought NOPE i might not be an oil painting , but i sure as hell can make other people feel good ,

 

[Bagpuss]

When i was younger (late teens) i used to think i was quite confident, i would walk into a job interview knowing that i didn't have all the expected qualifications but would end up getting the job...was it confidence or just blagging it....???? (i got some pretty good jobs back then too...:lol

At work i would often be chosen to act as spokesperson for our team if they had any greivences...again i didn't mind at all and could and would argue my point with people who i knew where far more intellectual than i was....but somehow i would come out of it fine and with the grievance sorted.....confidence or just gobby...????

looking back now....i don't think it was confidence so much as feeling i had nothing to lose....i guess it was just being a chancer.

Now (at 35) i see things differently....now i know when to shut up...sit back and quietly observe, confident in the fact that there is a way and a place to do things.

So i do think true confidence together with knowledge does come with age....its isn't about being able to gob off thinking you know it all.....thats not confidence...its ignorance and arrogance.

I don't think anyone is truly confident about the way they look...but i do think acceptance is a great way to be happy within your own skin.....if people don't like what they see, they ain't gotta look.

 

[Kim Lawless]

I think it does...............either that or I just can't remember how bad I am. xx