Friends dragging you down

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Lisa32

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I have a 'best friend' who is so flippin' negative about everything, she questions everything I do, even down to if I turn up to the school run in a different pair of shoes on the school run she'll make a snarky comment like 'who you trying to impress' (I'm talking a pair of flat ankle boots instead of my scruffy converse)

I was talking to her about my plans to set up a salon in my summerhouse, her reply 'well don't get too excited, it's not happened yet'! I replied sarcastically 'thanks for bursting my bubble' and her reply... 'well someone had to bring you back down to earth with a thud'

Why does she feel the need to be so miserable about everything???
 

cheekychick

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Doesn't sound like much of a friend To me.
Is she down in herself? Maybe that's why she feels the need to put a downer on things in your life. I'd ask her about why she is the way that she is with you.

I had a 'friend' like that, but the negativity was really getting to
Me so I distanced myself from her.
My life has been so much happier without her in it. Xx
 

Lisa32

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She's always been old before her time but last few years she has been awful, I know she hates her job and I wonder if she's jealous that I'm happy in mine and that I'm enjoying my training in beauty therapy and know where I'm heading. I just find it hard as I'm quite a happy, cheery person and she's very hard work :-(

Thanks for your reply :) xx
 

cheekychick

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Try not to let it get you down but I'd Definitely have a chat with her.
Maybe she doesn't realise she is being so negative and it's affecting you.
If you've been friends for a long time it's worth trying to repair the relationship before one day she says something that really upsets you and it's too late. Xx
 

Emm87

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I have had 'friends' like this, eventually I had to distance myself from them, and now don't speak to them. I think it sounds like she's jealous of you, but also unhappy in her own life so can't help herself but try to bring you down. It's up to you whether you want to persevere in the friendship, but do you think she will change? If not, why have people in your life that make you feel like that? Also, I wasn't happy in my old job, yet I would never think to bring friends or family down with sarky negative comments. She sounds like she'd be happier around you if you were not happy in your life, as she'd have one up on you. That is not a friend.
 

cassies97

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Grow out of people who aren't growing.
 

pinkknailss

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Ruby S

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I have (or had I guess) a friend like this. She thinks she's outgrown me I think, because I chose my career over children and now she won't let me spend time with her kids or hides when I call round..It's very strange. It started exactly when I opened my salon.. she didn't come the open day and has called in once for a treatment when her step mum bought her voucher. She is too busy to catch up for a chat and always gives me a time slot that she knows I can't do because it will be my late night or whatever…then I see her wandering around Waitrose like she's got all the time in the world! I won't lie, it hurts because we were very close and have been through ALOT together and I would've thought that now that we both have what we always wanted and makes us happy, that we could be happy TOGETHER… apparently not. I have made a decision to let her go because thinking about "what have I done?" is really negative and I feel like I'm walking on egg shells…thats not friendship.
 

Flying Beauty

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I have a 'best friend' who is so flippin' negative about everything, she questions everything I do, even down to if I turn up to the school run in a different pair of shoes on the school run she'll make a snarky comment like 'who you trying to impress' (I'm talking a pair of flat ankle boots instead of my scruffy converse)

I was talking to her about my plans to set up a salon in my summerhouse, her reply 'well don't get too excited, it's not happened yet'! I replied sarcastically 'thanks for bursting my bubble' and her reply... 'well someone had to bring you back down to earth with a thud'

Why does she feel the need to be so miserable about everything???


Get rid! People like this love to see you fail. Xx sty off in your summer house you'll meet lots of new customers and inevitably, some will become new friends.

I wish you well xx
 

Jasmine Dean

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She doesn't sound like a very supportive friend at all and that's what you need!

I think setting up your business in your summer house is a fab idea!

She's sounds jealous to me, you don't need that negativity! Xx
 

surf girl

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I had a friend like that... I don't anymore :)
 

Lisa32

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Thank you all for your replies, means alot xxx
 

KHS

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I had a whole group of friends like that, all mixed ages, very controlling - you're either in the group or out...type of attitude, they got snotty when I pulled away to concentrate on my sons GCSE revision with him, ....bye bye I don't need people who expect my son to be second best, or I can't do anything by myself worh other people without going with them...these are grown adults fgs some in their late 50's who should know better

Cut her off!
 

tiara08

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Would you try sit her down and ask her whats going on or why does she feel the need to treat you like this? She sounds like she has serious personal issues and needs to be made aware her behaviour is unacceptable - true friends have you back but sadly we all know one of these people!;)
 

byKaty

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Walk away. Now. Negative people like that will just bring you down and zap your confidence. That's not a friendship.
 

Miss Sparkle

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She's not a friend, she's a frenemy. Distance yourself, then get rid and focus on your business. It sounds harsh but you don't need her negative energy xx
 

Miss_Holly

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I have a friend similar, though not quite that bad. She will nit pick tiny things (for example, im very pale thank you English/Irish heritage lol! And as a result have a lot of freckles from sun exposure as I don't tan at all. one night she randomly mentioned them, and asked if I hate them because of how they look. Another time she offered to do my make up and made a huge thing about the fact I have "hooded eyelids", and I've now made it a habit to avoid accepting her offers to play make up on me due to the fact she will make a fuss of the fact I have "baby fat" on my face I never "grew out of", while not realising it's actually called a "round" face shape l!!)

I've realised she does all this, and points out other people's flaws, because she is insecure and trying to reassure herself (I don't see how but anyway). So now I only see her when we all hang out as a group because I don't need that in my life lol!!

To be honest if she is a negative Nancy again I would just flat out ask what her issue is
 

nailpod

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There are millions of ppl in the world why waste your time with someone person who makes you feel worse or drained after your time spent with her! It's really not worth it.
 

Sunny days

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There are millions of ppl in the world why waste your time with someone person who makes you feel worse or drained after your time spent with her! It's really not worth it.
I love this and really need to remember it myself more often! xx
 

Gina Ballerina

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I used to have a best friend like this.
We fell out when I got engaged, when I got married (she didn't come) and then when I opened my salon she ruined my 'opening night' (it was just friends and champers, no clients) each time I forgave her. I thought what will happen when I have a baby? The same?
That was over a year and I really mourned the loss because she was my best friend but I now know I'm much better off and have reconnected with friends id had for years and neglected.

A client once told me you have Lilly's & Leaches in your life.
You can't help but stick with the leaches and they suck the life out of you but the Lilly's are just sitting there pretty.
The Lilies just bring joy to your life.
Get rid of the leaches and look after your lilies.

I had my lilies all along but now I look after my lilies. Nurture those friendships
Xx
 

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