Going back to employment/dealing with people?

[laurakate]

Short Version

I didn't have a particularly good experience in the last two spa jobs I had. There was bitchyness, immaturity and an excessive amount of politics and I don't think I was treated well. Sometimes it felt personal. Sometimes it didn't. This is largely why I left both jobs but I am now considering going back to something similar because I want the money.

As someone who likes to be treated fairly and remain professional, can I expect better from going back to work in the spa environment or are they pretty much all like that?

On a good day I am a vey tactful, patient, kind and tolerant person and this is pretty much who I am in the workplace as well a being a helpful and easy to get on with member of a team.

However, I left my last two spa jobs because it reached a point where I absolutely could not stand to be there anymore. I left both on good terms because I chose to leave in good time before the way I was feeling could come across in my work. I wanted to keep professional and get a good reference.

I am now self employed by default in that it was never my dream to work for myself and although it's going alright and I'm reaching the goals that I set myself, I truly don't believe that it's the most financially constructive option and there's nothing anyone can say to change my mind on that.

As a result of this, I'm considering looking for employed work again but I don't want to set myself up for something that's just not going to work. Although I got on with the majority of the staff in my work places (I was quite popular among a lot of the troops in my rank), I really did not like how the management treated people. It wasn't about who had the most skills (people and treatments), knowledge and passion. It was about who was in their clique and who could shout the loudest even if what they were saying was of little help or value. As an intelligent, genuine and hard working person, it used to wind me up being treated unfairly by what I can only describe as, on a bad day, little girls or as I sometimes put it "spa girls and their spa mates".

Am I being bitter? Is this normal for spas or was I just excessively unlucky to land two jobs like this in a row? Is this apparent in every industry or is it a beauty industry thing? Does this sort of rubbish happen in abnormally toxic work places or is it normal and it's me who needs to man up?! Am I asking for too much in wanting to work in a spa where the management is a mature and experienced group that I can look up to rather than a bunch of younger girls who spend more time looking out for themselves rather than having an awareness of their teams needs?

I don't want to bore you all with endless examples of what I was unhappy about in my previous jobs but I know that there was unfair treatment and politics beyond what I thought was reasonable and they have really effected my confidence both in my ability to assert myself and in the opportunities that are available in working for someone else in general.

I could do with going back into employment for the money (I'd even consider asking if I could return to one of my old jobs purely because it was convenient and I hate doing a long commute after a full days work in a spa).

Am I thinking straight? Maybe I'm just brewing in my own bitterness having removed myself from the spa/employment environment for a few months now.

Another concern is being in an employed role and having to work with products that employers refuse to offer training with. It got to the point where I couldn't stand to look at another product brand logo in the work place knowing that I had worked with it for two years and still had no training in it whilst my peers who had been there for less time who were in with the management got lots more training and opportunity handed to them on a plate. There are days where I still feel inferior as a therapist because of it because it felt like they were really rubbing it in. Maybe the fact that I'm a little older and mature and didn't want to get "steaming" with them at the weekends had something to do with it. I don't know!

So I'm bitter and I want to know if I can expect better because I want to go where the money is but I can't face putting up with the same rubbish day in day out.

I could really do with some advice here so please help if you can.

 

[Bombalurina]

I've seen countless threads from you in recent months, and have read but not commented. It seems to me that when you were in the spa you weren't happy and were looking for something that suited you better. Now you're trying something else, you're still not happy and thinking about going back to the spa. It's hard to keep up with you!! I don't mean this to come across harshly, it's not meant that way at all.

The grass isn't always greener. Personally my advice would be to keep doing what you're doing and don't give up so easily. You've not been self employed long. And as for saying self employment isn't financially rewarding? Charge more. I don't see how you can earn more working in a spa than for yourself. I work for myself and earn far more than I ever could in a spa.

Only you are in charge of your life, you and only you have control of your happiness.

 

[hazeleyes]

I've seen countless threads from you in recent months, and have read but not commented. It seems to me that when you were in the spa you weren't happy and were looking for something that suited you better. Now you're trying something else, you're still not happy and thinking about going back to the spa. It's hard to keep up with you!! I don't mean this to come across harshly, it's not meant that way at all.

The grass isn't always greener. Personally my advice would be to keep doing what you're doing and don't give up so easily. You've not been self employed long. And as for saying self employment isn't financially rewarding? Charge more. I don't see how you can earn more working in a spa than for yourself. I work for myself and earn far more than I ever could in a spa.

Only you are in charge of your life, you and only you have control of your happiness.

Must say I agree, very few last in Spas throughout their entire career and there must be a reason why?!
I think your earnings are practically unlimited while working for yourself? Yes it's a risk, yes it's hard work but nothing good comes easy! You've only branched out on your own recently, why not give it more time? It takes time to get out of the red when starting up with little or no client base but it seems like you've already listed so many reasons why the spa isn't for you?
Don't give up! Rome wasn't built in a day!
X

 

[AmberExt]

Do you think your a bit lonely? Maybe a bit bored waiting? I think you like spa's more then just the money, you speak very highly of them to new girls perhaps it's worth figuring out exactly what you enjoyed (fast pace/mentoring/large company structure?) and find that job.


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[happyfeet]

Oh lovey you an half give yourself a hard time ♡ and could possibly be over thinking things. Perhaps a little restless even.

I don't read that you're bitter, I just think that perhaps you're not sure what direction to take, so ultimately perhaps you are never quite as satisfied as you hoped you'd be.

You may find working for yourself is the best thing to find out what it is you most enjoy.

We spend a lot of time with our colleagues and there will be personalities we don't bond with of course. Perhaps a smaller work force environment may suit you better. I'm not terribly great with large numbers of people, I tend to go in my shell a bit, but a handful of people I feel more comfortable with.

Before nails I worked for several jobs in the same sector and worked with people of all ages. Of course there were some horrors lol but I also got on well with people- still friends with some of them ten years on.

You have to find a balance with enjoying your work and getting on with your colleagues- you don't always find the right mix every time but keep an open mind.

I personally think you need to take time to discover what you love, what you enjoy, the type of environment you'd like be in. But don't over complicate it or tie yourself in knots. Once you've got an idea of that, then go find a salon or spa that fits you as well as them. You may even find you love being self employed.

Good luck and don't be too hard on yourself missus xxx



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[Chrysalis]

As previously said I too have read your posts previously and lived through you making the decision to be where you are now.

I agree self employment can be isolating, no job is perfect it's about being aware of the pros and cons of each situation and making the best of the better situation.

Perhaps you are needing to move on in your self employment?

How about taking the plunge getting a salon and renting out chairs, couches etc then you will be management?

Or doing something completely different part time, running two careers, which will "dilute" the cons if you understand.

You may benefit from a couple of life coaching sessions, I did, I saw things from a different perspective after them sessions, it's strange how we can become stale and ingrained in our own mind sets.

Don't worry about feeling like this though, we have all been there, well I have, and find a way to harness this thinking and energy and channel it to bring you positive feelings and outcomes, it is new year after all.

Keep us upto date how you progress and what you decide, remember you are on a journey.

 

[laurakate]

Thank you everyone for your replies.

I've got a good support network around me with self employment and my partner is giving me so much support that I feel a bit guilty about my lack of enthusiasm for it. Maybe an amount of that is derived from the fact that I see self employment as a bit of a stop gap. I don't really aspire to put the effort into getting a business that I don't want to be running in the long run and that is why my self employed venture is so small in that as soon as I can teach full time I'll go off and do that because that's what I've always wanted.

Because I'm hoping to begin a part time two year teaching degree in September, I really need to put my energy into earning/saving money over the next nine months rather than making a smaller profit from self employment.

In spas, I find the work interesting and I like meeting new clients and keeping my hand in and I like the banter between the nice colleagues and I know I'd have a good chance of saving the sort of money I want for teacher training and extra courses to build in my skills.

The things I don't like about spas is the bitching and this culture of fear and intimidation that can come about from faceless and spineless management. I also don't like working with products without the proper training because it makes me feel like a fraud.

So I need to go where the money is so it could go either way. I've applied to a temp agency but I'm not sure what to expect.

I've always wanted to teach in an fe college and I hope I'll have found my niche and happiness when I get there. I'm more interested in people and education than beauty itself in some ways. If that falls through I don't know what I'll be aiming for.

Thanks again for your replies.

 

[hazelb]

I think you have answered your own question.

..You are not happy being self employed as it's not what you want to do......

I know your aim is to use the self employment as a way to get through your teaching course but it will be hard if not impossible to build and maintain a business if your heart isn't in it.

So what would work for you for the next two years? It may have to work even longer unless you can walk straight into a full time teaching position!

You could go back to a spa/ beauty job...but I suspect that will be even more dissatisfying, as it's a step backwards.

Agency may work..but I don't think it will be much different from being employed..but less certain, more transient, less investment from employers.

What about getting some teaching experience? helping out /adult ed etc? It would make you more employable when you are qualified.

 

[laurakate]

Thanks.

The perks of self employment are that I can take responsibility for my own training and treatment menu which means that I can be more versatile which will build on my cv for teaching purposes because I can get more experience of being able to do a wider range of treatments that way. Trouble is that I really don't enjoy having to do all the promotional stuff. I am not a salesperson and because I have little interest in this aspect of the role I don't make much money.

I agree with you about the teaching experience. We have to do that on the teaching course because out of the few I've applied to, they all require it at that level of study. Still need to go where the money is at the moment though.

I hope I can get a teaching job somehow. I also have the option of training to teach my non beauty degree level subject in a secondary school. It could perhaps be easier to get a job this way compared to getting into fe but I know I'd much rather work with an fe age group so I think I should aim for that.

From the point of qualifying in nails and beauty I've always known that I've wanted to teach so in some ways I've always put a lot of pressure on myself to achieve things in my years of experience I'm trying to "clock up" prior to that. Rightly or wrongly, I see my time in industry as something that I need to do to get to where I ultimately want to be which is perhaps why I'm not too bowled over about what my options are at the moment.

Despite the above paragraph I still think I'll be a good advocate for the industry to students though because I have a genuine interest in the treatments and the skills they require and I want to be in a role where I am able to help people see their potential and gain confidence and I see no reason as to why I shouldn't be able to do that even if I am training people to do a job that I no longer want to do (I'm sure there are lots of teachers who wouldn't go back on a cruise ship for example).