Having a bad week

[Emily Case]

Hi everyone.

Just need a bit of a whinge really so feel free to ignore!

It's my birthday on Sunday and I've taken a few days off... My first real break since I opened my business in 2011. I've been really excited up until last week.

My boyfriend told me in January that he was going to take some time off so we could go away for a couple of days over my birthday weekend... But he forgot to ask his boss for time off so that's not happening. However, he still managed to get Sat/Sun at the weekend off without asking which was a bonus. Last week, he told me that he has decided to work (voluntarily) with his dad doing a roof on the Saturday which I was gutted about as he was going to spend the day with me, but to make it up to me he would take me out for dinner on Saturday night and asked me to book the table for 6ish when he would be finished. So I did, and the other day I reminded him... To which he cursed and said he wasn't going to make it, so I cancelled the table. As far as I was concerned he had made it abundantly clear that he didn't want to spend time with me, so I made plans to go out with a friend.

I was supposed to be taking this Friday off too, but I had clients begging for appointments so I it up, booked appointments in, only to have 2 of them cancel so now I have a huge gap in the day. Still, I have Saturday, right?

Wrong. I just received a message from my friend saying she has decided to take a work mate's shift on Saturday.

I'm so bitterly disappointed. The two people I hold closest to my heart would rather work than tolerate my company... I'm obviously so dull and unlikeable that money is more important.

I'm in a really crappy place right now. I've worked my backside off for ages to get where I am and am running a successful business, tutoring at a college and doing well, but I rarely (if ever) go out. I turn 20 this weekend and when I should be out partying like other people my age, I'm feeling guilty for turning down business for 4 days off! I just feel a bit let down.

If you've read this far, congratulations, LOL! Thanks for letting me let off some very bottled up emotions.

Xx

 

[Rhiannon1408]

And breathe...

Oh sweetie, sounds like you have a busy lifestyle and a few unfortunate things have all happened at once. Never feel guilty for taking a few days off work, we all deserve this and clients should understand that we're only human.

Maybe you could suggest a belated birthday weekend away with your boyfriend? Make sure you both can have a couple of days off work and book into a hotel or something?

I do hope you have a nice birthday, maybe you use the time to give yourself a bit of a pamper day, do your nails etc have some 'me time'.

 

[Leely]

Keep positive hun.

I think it's a bit weird how your bf and best friend all of a sudden cant meet up with you.

Maybe they have something planned as a surprise for you? As by the sounds of it they know how hard you work, if you have not had any one off since 2011 why not treat your self to a spar day, let yourself be the client for a change.

Happy birthday for weekend hopefully things pick up xx

 

[Steph86]

Keep positive hun.

I think it's a bit weird how your bf and best friend all of a sudden cant meet up with you.

Maybe they have something planned as a surprise for you? As by the sounds of it they know how hard you work, if you have not had any one off since 2011 why not treat your self to a spar day, let yourself be the client for a change.

Happy birthday for weekend hopefully things pick up xx

I agree, I have my fingers crossed for a lovely surprise xx

 

[Pedifan]

I was thinking the same, it does seem odd.

I really hope that they have a surprise planned for you.

 

[Rachul123]

Boys are crap. for my boyfs birthday i booked for us to go to london and to go to harry potter world (cos wer geeks) aswell as afew presents.
For mine i got paper and ink for the printer he got me for xmas...

You could Have a word with him and say youre abit upset and ask when he is definitely free so you can do something please? And to keep it free!!
And as for your friend i bet she didnt even think about im sure shed feel bad if u told her how bad you felt.
Try rearrange so you have something to look forward to X

 

[Rachul123]

P.s, book a holiday! X

 

[ChicUnique]

Why don't you wait and see, they might be trying to organise a surprise for you, and your "being awkward" lol I did a you for my hen night, I was a complete nightmare for all involved!

And if we are all wrong and (god forbid) you are disappointed then decide what to do about it, book a holiday or have a chat with your nearest and dearest <3 xx

 

[melissab]

Keep positive hun.

I think it's a bit weird how your bf and best friend all of a sudden cant meet up with you.

Maybe they have something planned as a surprise for you? As by the sounds of it they know how hard you work, if you have not had any one off since 2011 why not treat your self to a spar day, let yourself be the client for a change.

Happy birthday for weekend hopefully things pick up xx

I thought the same thing also. My fingers are crossed that it is a big surprise for you. Hope everything works out and you have a fantastic birthday!!!!! Xx

 

[cabby]

I hope something nice happens for you xxx

 

[Kle]

Sounds like something my bf would do.i got a birthday card on valentines day,got to cook dinner on Mother's Day and on my birthday my closest friends couldn't make it with the worst excuses ever. Like the others have said why dont u go and treat urself and make ur own plans!!

 

[Lynne Baker]

If that were me I really, really wouldn't be hoping that they've booked a surprise, purely because when it doesn't materialise I would be even more heartbroken.
Again, if this were me I'd be thinking sod the lot of them; I'm booking myself on a spa day/night thing, on my own, with my ipad and plenty of treatments booked. Assuming of course that I could afford to do it. If I couldn't afford that I'd make sure I had plenty of sky plus to watch, and a bottle of fizz. I'd lock the door, switch off my phone and tell them all to bugger off; selfish gits.

 

[NiCshairstudio]

If that were me I really, really wouldn't be hoping that they've booked a surprise, purely because when it doesn't materialise I would be even more heartbroken.
Again, if this were me I'd be thinking sod the lot of them; I'm booking myself on a spa day/night thing, on my own, with my ipad and plenty of treatments booked. Assuming of course that I could afford to do it. If I couldn't afford that I'd make sure I had plenty of sky plus to watch, and a bottle of fizz. I'd lock the door, switch off my phone and tell them all to bugger off; selfish gits.

I agree with Lynne, my first thought was hopefully they have arranged for a treat or a party or something. But then I didn't want to suggest that in case you get your hopes up for it not to materialise which will just top your weekend off completely by the sounds of it :'(

Plus bf if this was the case, your bf maybe needed you to cancel the food so that was the only way he knew how but your friend could still have kept your plans, for all you knew, and wouldn't make a difference.

Me and my friends arranged about a month ago for one of our best friends to come to one of ours for a BBQ/house warming, just the girls and all we had to do was make sure she came, the plan actually was we were all taking her out for a meal on us, for her last send off before getting married.

If you make people think they are spending they're bday or planned day alone, you fill it with other things to do! Be selfish, sounds like you need too with the amount you work xx do let your friend and bf know how upset you are though, otherwise they won't realise.

 

[Mobile Manicure]

Why can't he make dinner? Still working? Cant you go out later when he's finished? I don't get it.....What is he doing when he's finished work or is he working through the night? 6pm is a bit early anyway for dinner on a Saturday night isn't it?

All sounds very fishy to me!!

 

[Emily Case]

Thank you all so much for your lovely replies.

Unfortunately, knowing both of them very well (and the times for cancelling don't add up), they're not planning anything... It's a shame really as maybe they should read these replies!! Lol.

I am going out for a few drinks tomorrow night with my hairdresser and she's also taking me to her friends BBQ on Saturday so that I'm not alone... Bless her.

I'm feeling better now. Yesterday I was a bit "fragile"... But my students all did really well last night during exams and assessments so that brightened me up.

Now I'm just feeling like "sod the lot of them, I'll please myself" when it comes to the last-minute-cancellers (as I've christened them). I'm going to get merry and eat birthday cake.

Xxx

 

[Emily Case]

Why can't he make dinner? Still working? Cant you go out later when he's finished? I don't get it.....What is he doing when he's finished work or is he working through the night? 6pm is a bit early anyway for dinner on a Saturday night isn't it?

All sounds very fishy to me!!

He asked me to make the table later but the way he was acting all week (moody, selfish, downright rude most of the time) I didn't want to deal with it... so I cancelled the table altogether and told HIM to rebook it for a more convenient time - he didn't. So I went ahead and made other plans with my friend. He always eats at about 5:30-6ish so that's the usual time for dinner

Xxx

 

[Emily Case]

If you make people think they are spending they're bday or planned day alone, you fill it with other things to do!

You're exactly right. I'd have thought if they were planning something they would have said "we've booked cinema tickets" or something so they knew I'd be with them! I just don't reckon they've even thought about how let down I'd be feeling.

My boyfriend works hard but he leaves his work at home every day, and my best friend is a waitress so she does the same. I don't think either of them appreciate the excitement of not having to deal with clients and business for a few days, just to realise you'll pretty much be spending those days alone! I've recorded 4 films to watch and have stashed some Haribo

Xxx

 

[Emily Case]

Boys are crap. for my boyfs birthday i booked for us to go to london and to go to harry potter world (cos wer geeks) aswell as afew presents.
For mine i got paper and ink for the printer he got me for xmas...

Last year, I bought my man a beautiful watch and made a huge scrapbook filled with pictures and quotes and lyrics... For my birthday? He turned up to my house with a Tesco bag containing special offer Malibu and Tesco Value diet coke. This year, I bought him a phone... Maybe I'll get Pepsi this year?!!

Xxx

 

[Lynne Baker]

And you're still with him because?

In my (not inconsiderable) experience with men you are destined for a life of disappointment and resentment with this chap. I'm sure you're worth more than that.

 

[Emily Case]

And you're still with him because?

In my (not inconsiderable) experience with men you are destined for a life of disappointment and resentment with this chap. I'm sure you're worth more than that.

I totally see where you're coming from but he's actually a really lovely genuine person, just a bit thoughtless. He's not nasty and doesn't have a bad bone in his body, he just doesn't really "get" birthdays and neither do his family! He does "get" xmas though, it's weird. I think it's down to his dad who doesn't open presents, cards or anything that anyone gets him - it's been a constant let down all his life trying to buy gifts for people he loves, it is very sad. I do know that he doesn't mean to be like this, he doesn't even realise he's done something wrong until I mention my disappointment.

The majority of the time we are really happy together, it's just things like this that really get to me. He's only a year older than me so I reckon it's a maturity thing too. I still love him flaws and all, he does feel particularly guilty about letting me down (especially after my friend did too). We will get past this, but I'm a bit of a sensitive soul whereas he's a bit fiery... I got an apology at least! I hope he makes it up to me... All I want is his time, it's a shame he doesn't see that.

Xxx