Opinions on cocaine use

[Emii]

Hi everyone,
Bit random, but I’m just interested to hear peoples views on cocaine use.

Basically it’s come to light that my other half has been using it a lot more than he’s let on and I am not happy about it.

I’ve know for a while now that he used to use it when he was a lot younger and he told me that he hasn’t used it for years, well turns out that in actual fact he’s been using it when ever he’s been out on a social, admittedly it’s not that often as he works like a dog and doesn’t have much time so we’re talking every few months here. And he hasn’t admitted this to me I’ve found this out by accident.

I am very anti drugs that’s just my opinion but he can’t seem to see the problem he seems to think it’s on the same lines as drinking it’s not a problem and doesn’t see why I hate it so much. Fair enough that’s his opinion but if it’s not a problem then why lie for years.

Fair enough, his opinion but really I’m absolutely devistated at this new finding but I just want to know peoples thoughts on it, am I the only one who finds it disgusting, am I being old fashioned and well over the top here? It seems to be that most ppl do it now and it isn’t a problem so maybe it is me? Thoughts would be great as I’m struggling with this one.

Thanks all

 

[Trinity]

I'm very anti drugs, so probably not an unbiased opinion, but I'm not sure the drug use is the issue. I think it's the feeling of betrayal and the breach of trust that needs addressing in the relationship. It's a tough position to be in. Take it from an old lady who put up with lots of bad behavour from unworthy men over the years....do not compromise your principles and beliefs for someone else. You deserve someone who respects you and your views and feelings.

 

[JJ8]

I’m anti drugs but I also know a lot of people do Cocaine and I don’t judge them for it, Iv never taken it so not sure what all the hype is about. A lot of my friends have taken it when I was out with them but honestly that picture of Daniela Westbrook was enough to put me off and I still feel terrible for her when I see her on tv or in the papers because it obviously had a terrible affect on her, I don’t think any drugs are good for people, including alcohol, I do think it’s just as bad to be honest [emoji85] I know an awful lot of people that only do it socially when drinking, I think lying about it is the real issue here. And I agree with Trinity about not compromising tour principles. Good luck

 

[JJ8]

And no you’re not the problem, I wouldn’t say most people do it either .. I mean I know a lot of people that do it but for sure I know a lot more people that don’t.

 

[AcidPerm]

‘Everyone does it babe’.
Most people do not use drugs and virtually everyone values honesty in a partner.

Don’t have children with this idiot.

Everyone who does drugs thinks they’re in control but they never are.
It’s a drain on money especially joint finances and can lead to all sorts of health problems later on.
I’ve known people who were functioning alcoholics and functioning drug users but several are now dead and didn’t make 50.

Don’t forget that taking drugs unlike alcohol, is still illegal and a drugs related conviction can lead to instant dismissal in many industries and professions.

 

[sarah7898]

My best friend had her life turned upside down when it turned out her husband had a terrible cocaine habit. Everyone knew but her.. they lost the house, he lost multiple jobs he owes her dad 16k which will never be repaid.
He also gave her STDs and gives her no money for the two children they share.
Turns out he's a massive sociopath anyway, he's a nasty piece of work!

He hid it from her for all that time. 10-11 years.

I think it's a drug that people will try once or twice but I think it's a problem if you start to need it to have a good time.
I tried a few times, horrible stuff and such a waste of money!

 

[Emii]

Thank you all for your replies I really appreciate hearing them. Good to hear of some anti drugs and some who have tried it and still don’t get it. I personally do not get it, I always look at the bigger picture and apart from I feel it’s disgusting it’s also what it supports, all the crime around the world, I could go on but let’s not get into all that now.

He knows how much I hate it, I was completely shocked the first time he came out with it cuz I genuinely would never have him down as someone who does it, he is lovely and looks innocent and just not that way, anyway then found out about another time at a friends birthday that funnily enough he didn’t want me to go to, we’ll found out why didn’t I they were all doing it. So since then I said to him I’m not telling you what to do you want to
Shovel that into your body you carry on BUT I want you to be honest with me and tell me when you have done it and if you’ve done it on a night out in the future I don’t want you sleeping in our room stay on the sofa until it’s out of your system, may sound ott to some but that was my terms. For someone who’s so anti drugs I think that’s very fair and open minded of me. We have a son and also for that reason I didn’t want him anywhere near him with that in his body still.
He told me he never touched it, he was armament, he went away on a stag weekend I asked him to leave it well alone think of your son before you go snorting it up your nose was my words. Found out the other night he done it that weekend. I was blown away. After I asked him not to he done it, but he lied through his teeth to me. I think your all right it’s the lies and dissect not so much what he’s doing.

I am so angry, upset and disappointed in him. I truly love him and he is a good guy, well so I thought but learning the person you love and would do anything for had bassically lies through their teeth to you on something you feel so strongly about is a slight shock to the system. I’ve not slept the last two nights cuz all I’m doing is wondering when he’s done it if there’s anything else he’s lied about, he actually apologized the next morning which shows he knows he’s in the wrong but since I haven’t said anything as not sure what to say I’m so disappointed with it all. Can’t have a third sleepless night though need to tackle it.

Not really sure what or how to to say anything but I’m just thinking of saying it’s clear you’ve been doing it on every social putting don’t try to lie or deny it and if you really haven’t well it’s tough cuz the trust has been lost so I will be assuming this now and regardless of if you take it or not any night out you are on the sofa that night.

God I don’t know all I know is my head is scrambled

 

[JJ8]

Thank you all for your replies I really appreciate hearing them. Good to hear of some anti drugs and some who have tried it and still don’t get it. I personally do not get it, I always look at the bigger picture and apart from I feel it’s disgusting it’s also what it supports, all the crime around the world, I could go on but let’s not get into all that now.

He knows how much I hate it, I was completely shocked the first time he came out with it cuz I genuinely would never have him down as someone who does it, he is lovely and looks innocent and just not that way, anyway then found out about another time at a friends birthday that funnily enough he didn’t want me to go to, we’ll found out why didn’t I they were all doing it. So since then I said to him I’m not telling you what to do you want to
Shovel that into your body you carry on BUT I want you to be honest with me and tell me when you have done it and if you’ve done it on a night out in the future I don’t want you sleeping in our room stay on the sofa until it’s out of your system, may sound ott to some but that was my terms. For someone who’s so anti drugs I think that’s very fair and open minded of me. We have a son and also for that reason I didn’t want him anywhere near him with that in his body still.
He told me he never touched it, he was armament, he went away on a stag weekend I asked him to leave it well alone think of your son before you go snorting it up your nose was my words. Found out the other night he done it that weekend. I was blown away. After I asked him not to he done it, but he lied through his teeth to me. I think your all right it’s the lies and dissect not so much what he’s doing.

I am so angry, upset and disappointed in him. I truly love him and he is a good guy, well so I thought but learning the person you love and would do anything for had bassically lies through their teeth to you on something you feel so strongly about is a slight shock to the system. I’ve not slept the last two nights cuz all I’m doing is wondering when he’s done it if there’s anything else he’s lied about, he actually apologized the next morning which shows he knows he’s in the wrong but since I haven’t said anything as not sure what to say I’m so disappointed with it all. Can’t have a third sleepless night though need to tackle it.

Not really sure what or how to to say anything but I’m just thinking of saying it’s clear you’ve been doing it on every social putting don’t try to lie or deny it and if you really haven’t well it’s tough cuz the trust has been lost so I will be assuming this now and regardless of if you take it or not any night out you are on the sofa that night.

God I don’t know all I know is my head is scrambled

Bless you it sounds like a very hard situation to be in, I don’t like drugs or alcohol and when my partner goes out I tell him to stay with his friends because I just don’t like being around drunk people and my children aren’t used to it, not that I think that’s totally normal either it’s just I get really annoyed with the constant repeating the same stuff that drunk people seem to do ‍
Anyway I don’t have any advice for you I just hope you work things through and I hope he understands what he’s doing? Would you tell him that you find it unexceptionable and don’t want to be with someone that takes drugs? I’m not sure what else you can do? I agree about the bigger picture what it does to the world and the awful things that happen because of drugs

 

[AbbiMarigold]

Im not anti drugs, but obviously not all drugs are equal, we arent just talking about weed or alchol here, its alot stronger alot more addictive alot more likely to give hime a heart attack and alot more expencive...

 

[Emii]

It’s funny how we see it so differently he really doesn’t see it as class a illegal drug that could pose a problem he’s sees it as it’s a bit of fun only done socially now and then and it’s harmless.
Where as my opinion is the complete opposite it’s addictive it’s dirty it’s stupid cuz half the time your probably snorting vanish up your nose than pure coke I could go on i hate it for some many reasons I just don’t see why you’d risk having a habit for the sake of a high for a short time if you can’t have fun with your mates without it maybe get some different mates?

Anyway I respect his opinion and choices in life I’ve told him I want him no where near me if/when he does it again I don’t want him near our children when he’s done it and I’ve made it very clear that he must tell me when he’s done it and if he lies to me I will find out and there will be consequences.
He actually seemed really frightened that I was going to end the relationship, which is a good sign to me he finally understands how much I hate it and won’t tolerate it near me or our children.
End of the day we have different opinions I’m very open minded and I know if I tell him he can’t do something he’ll probably do it more, so that’s how it’s left and I do think the chances of him doing it again are pretty slim cuz he won’t want me to stop him being around the kids for the day after he’s done it and he knows how much I hate it so let’s hope by being honest open minded and not nagging or telling him no he will choose now to not do it in the future. He’s a fool if he does because there’s a lot at stake and he knows this. thanks all for replies really good to get other opinions on it [emoji1303]

 

[Cindy2021]

It’s a class A highly addictive drug, nothing harmless about it. He’s no idea what else it’s been cut with.

Yes lots of people only use socially but others and some I know become addicted and it ruins both theirs and their family lives.

I have 3 teenagers and the thought of them being in an environment where this is now so easily accessible terrifies me.

I hope he realised how much this upsets you and respects your opinion.