Out of the mouths of babes

#81
Lol these are so funny! My 4 year old daughter came out with a funny if odd one on a break away in Wales earlier this year. We stayed in a caravan on a holiday park site & there was a no smoking sign in the kitchen (you know the ones with a cigarette & a line through it) She asked what it meant & I said you are not allowed to smoke in here, to which she replied "Can we do pop offs?" :eek::lol: After I finished laughing at her wide eyed innocent face I replied with something like "Er yes if you need to...." What ever made her think of that?! She comes out with some classics!
 

kattyj

Active Member
#82
I have two funny little stories about when I was younger;
When I was two and a half I shouted at the tv 'I f**king told ya!' my mom was mortifed! It later turned out that I had been trying to say 'fat controller' (from Thomas the Tank engine of course!)

When I was 14 I went shopping with my grandad and he put a 12 pack of condoms in the 70 year old woman's trolley in front of us! My grandad has got a twisted sense of humour! I was so embarrassed at the time!
X
My son used to say something very similar when he was saying the fat controller!!
 

#83
I have two funny little stories about when I was younger;
When I was two and a half I shouted at the tv 'I f**king told ya!' my mom was mortifed! It later turned out that I had been trying to say 'fat controller' (from Thomas the Tank engine of course!)

When I was 14 I went shopping with my grandad and he put a 12 pack of condoms in the 70 year old woman's trolley in front of us! My grandad has got a twisted sense of humour! I was so embarrassed at the time!
X

Oh dear... that made me laugh so hard and having just had a baby is NOT a good thing to do!!! :eek:
 

kattyj

Active Member
#84
Oh dear... that made me laugh so hard and having just had a baby is NOT a good thing to do!!! :eek:
Oh bless ya, dont laugh too hard, cough or sneeze right now!!
 

#85
I have 3 kids so have quite a few. I think the best one came from my eldest son when 4 years old. Having just had his baby sister he questioned me where babies came from. Of course my understanding was honesty is always the best policy an in very simple terms told him Mammy has an egg, Daddy has a sperm which he puts into Mammys tummy and a baby grows.
Few days later at the dinner table he asks Daddy to put a sperm in his tummy so he can grow a baby!
I still have the stains on the wall from the stew my husband spat half way across the room!
 

#86
I have 3 kids so have quite a few. I think the best one came from my eldest son when 4 years old. Having just had his baby sister he questioned me where babies came from. Of course my understanding was honesty is always the best policy an in very simple terms told him Mammy has an egg, Daddy has a sperm which he puts into Mammys tummy and a baby grows.
Few days later at the dinner table he asks Daddy to put a sperm in his tummy so he can grow a baby!
I still have the stains on the wall from the stew my husband spat half way across the room!
I just love that...:lol:
 

unas escarlata

Well-Known Member
#87
my friend's daughter asked her if she had a baby in her bottom like she had her sister in her tummy last year as her bottom was so big
 

unas escarlata

Well-Known Member
#88
another friend was in the bath with her young son who was horrified that he could see her "feathers"....we've never looked at a feather duster again in quite the same way!
 

HWilliams

Well-Known Member
#89
Anthony has been unwell and he was in my bed the other night. I asked him to go to sleep now and he told me he was concentrating!

Sat in a pub tonight and I went to get my dinner and he yelled mum where you going? Everyone stared! I thought I'd better not go back up even though it was all you can eat.

He overheard me say b......s once now when he's upset he says Oh bowlons.
 

HWilliams

Well-Known Member
#90
Went to get Ant from nursery in a new jacket I treated myself to, it's an Aviator style but with dark faux fur, really nice and warm... He stared at me, stroked the collar and said oh mummy, you is so soft just like George... Our cat is called George!
 

#91
I was in the shop today and chatting to the girl behind the counter, my daughter obviously just remembered and said rather loudly 'Mam you said to remind you to get Durex' Well the girl beind the counter almost had a fit laughing! I asked my daughter what she was on about. ' You said you needed them for the camera to take pictures of your nails' ' You mean Duracell chicken.............'


Thankfully the shop was quiet enough!
 

lilly

Well-Known Member
#92
A couple of days after suddenly losing my lovely dad, my 2 boys, then about 6, ran into mums back garden shouting..... Granny, Granny did you know Grandads dead !!!!:eek: Luckly it actually bought a smile to my mums face !
 

#93
Me and my friend were taking her 2 yr old daughter out the other day and I said to her are you going to see Santa? She replied with yes I'm going to sit on santas bum! LOL x
 

#94
While driving home from the cinema my 10 year old sister asked me as we drive past a "lady of the night" why is the lady standing in the street dressed like that?? Unsure what to say I decided to be truthful I told her she is a prostitute. With a puzzled look on her face she said "what's that?!!! But the quickly adding "oh wait I know it's religion like Catholics and prostitutes!" I couldn't stop laughing long enough to tell ger she means protestant!

when I told our mum, mum said "she better not tell her friends at School her dads a catholic and I'm a prostitute?!!
 

#95
While driving home from the cinema my 10 year old sister asked me as we drive past a "lady of the night" why is the lady standing in the street dressed like that?? Unsure what to say I decided to be truthful I told her she is a prostitute. With a puzzled look on her face she said "what's that?!!! But the quickly adding "oh wait I know it's religion like Catholics and prostitutes!" I couldn't stop laughing long enough to tell ger she means protestant!

when I told our mum, mum said "she better not tell her friends at School her dads a catholic and I'm a prostitute?!!

OMG that is so funny!
 

deanosnana

Super Moderator
Staff member
#96
The other day, Deano said to me, 'Grandma, did you know sh*t is crap's cousin?'

I almost fell over! OMG...where do kids get this stuff?
 

Planky1

Well-Known Member
#97
I was in the shop today and chatting to the girl behind the counter, my daughter obviously just remembered and said rather loudly 'Mam you said to remind you to get Durex' Well the girl beind the counter almost had a fit laughing! I asked my daughter what she was on about. ' You said you needed them for the camera to take pictures of your nails' ' You mean Duracell chicken.............'


Thankfully the shop was quiet enough!
This has made me howl!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahaha :lol:
 

#98
I love when my 24 month old daughter is looking for something, like her book, she'll run around singing, "Book, where are you?"

Sent from my PC36100 using SalonGeek
 

#99
HA these are soo funny, My eldest son 6 call's pins and needles pins and noodles and my youngest son who is 3 saw me in the bath and took one look at my tummy and said '' Mummy you're a good girl aren't you '' I asked why ? He replied cos you eat all your dinner up ''

I really must go on that diet !:lol:
 

Crystal colleen

Well-Known Member
I was having a shower the other day and my daughter ripped back the curtain I was having a shave down stairs normally nothing down there but on this occasion she said mummy I can't believe it you have got trees growing down there :eek: she then told me to turn round so I did and she said don't forget your bum mummy there is trees there to put the curtain back and left :o:o

Lol omg I shaved like my life depended on it lol x
 
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