Problems with make-up tutor, please help

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sparadise

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Hi I am currently doing my ITEC exam in makeup in Ireland. I am finding that I am getting 70plus % on my technical. My makeups are ok. But when I am doing my makeup case studies I took the pictures from the wrong angle and the tutor only reviewed these after I had done 4 out of the 5 case studies. I find her very mean spoking and using bullying tactics an I ended up leaving in tears from the course last week. I was cryingfor over an hour. I dont work well when someone is shouting at me and being over critical. I am over 40 and think that allthough these tactics might work on someone who is younger I just go to pieces. I dont have alot of self confidence and this is making me worse. I am petrified to stay to the course coordinator above her in case she will get alot worse with me and SHE has to pass the case studies and mock before I sit the exam. I paid over €800 for this course and it was so hard to get the money together, if I hadnt paid that I would have walked out. I just dont know how I am going to continue either with someone like that. Maybe it is a personality clash, I dont know. There is a few of the other girls who feel the same but are alot better at handling her comments than I am and just let it go over them. But she does appear worse with me than others. Please any advice would be appreciated as I dont know where to turn with this.
Ta in advance.
 

jade - portia

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Hi sparadise, you must go and speak to the course co-ordinator you are paying for a service this woman isn't doing you a personal favour. My experience has been that most bullies pick on the people they can and leave the others alone. So once you have spoken to the co-ordinator and got your concerns on record my guess is she will be much more careful about the way she deals with you in future.

As for not giving you the marks you deserve for your case studies and mock - for any course if you feel you have been treated unfairly there is a procedure you can follow to challenge it. So no need to worry there, just keep producing your best work and don't let her put you off.

It's strange isn't it how people try to gain power, the power hungry receptionist is one of the funniest ways I've seen ;)

Be strong and remember that it is your future and your money she is messing with so get your game face on and make an appointment with the course co-ordinator :)
 

cabby

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Yes you must go and speak to the person above her you have paid good money for this course effectively she is working for you. It may be you are a little more sensitive than others but it is time you spoke up. Xxxxx I know it may be hard but it is for the best xx
 

Susie H

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Hi there, I too am over 40, ok, I'm 49 in September, I'm at college doing my Btec beauty therapy so I know all about the case studies. Our tutor took the make up photo's on her camera, most of us took our own as well, but I think Kelly took a set to make sure it was all documented correctly. So I find your tutor a bit lacking there. On the subject of shouting, well okay, I've got a gob on me and I'm not slow about using it and I can tell you now, there is no way I would let that one go. You have paid a lot of money to be there and it's her job to make sure that you receive value for money.
I have an ongoing difference of opinion with one of my tutors, so I had a chat with a couple of the other tutors, one, to check that I wasn't wrong in my thinking and also to let of steam:) I was assured that if I wanted to, one of my tutors could set up a 121 meeting for me, in confidence where I could try to resolve these issues and bring them to the managements attention.
Yes, tutors are under a lot of pressure at this time of year, a lot of students start to loose their enthusiasm for the further education and it's part of the tutors job to make sure that they don't take the pee and get on with it. But shouting? reducing a student to tears? No, not on. You need to take this further and get it resolved. If you can't face doing it in person, then phone the admin team or email them to get the ball rolling.
good luck :hug:
 

missty25

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Definitely speak to someone higher up, you'll feel better for making your feelings known, especially when your paying for the course!
 

WaxGirl

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Hi I am currently doing my ITEC exam in makeup in Ireland. I am finding that I am getting 70plus % on my technical. My makeups are ok. But when I am doing my makeup case studies I took the pictures from the wrong angle and the tutor only reviewed these after I had done 4 out of the 5 case studies. I find her very mean spoking and using bullying tactics an I ended up leaving in tears from the course last week. I was cryingfor over an hour. I dont work well when someone is shouting at me and being over critical. I am over 40 and think that allthough these tactics might work on someone who is younger I just go to pieces. I dont have alot of self confidence and this is making me worse. I am petrified to stay to the course coordinator above her in case she will get alot worse with me and SHE has to pass the case studies and mock before I sit the exam. I paid over €800 for this course and it was so hard to get the money together, if I hadnt paid that I would have walked out. I just dont know how I am going to continue either with someone like that. Maybe it is a personality clash, I dont know. There is a few of the other girls who feel the same but are alot better at handling her comments than I am and just let it go over them. But she does appear worse with me than others. Please any advice would be appreciated as I dont know where to turn with this.
Ta in advance.
I think you need to toughen up a bit.

It's tough being critised but how else will you improve if you dont know where you are going wrong?

Suck it up a bit and get on with

Focus on being a professional and dealing with the criticism in that manner use it to push for perfection
 

sparadise

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Ta so much for all U replies it did make me feel so much better. I do know she was out of order cause I have sat other exams and had lots of different tutors and this is the first I have came up with this problem. And yes fair enough loveleelady criticism is necessary to improve but shouting is not necessary, neither is belittling someone! I have never been spoken to ever in the manner the tutor spoke to me by any other tutor and I would never ever speak to anyone like that. Some people just shouldnt be in education and she is one of them. An over 800 euro is too much money for me to throw away. So to all the others who were supportive thankyou very much I will be taking your advice and speaking to someone higher up. Like i said i have never had this problem before and was totally at a lost what to do.
 

WaxGirl

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Why not just go and speak to your tutor directly?

Why go to someone higher ? What are you hoping to achieve?

In a professional salon you are going to be dealing with difficult customers and they are the customer so often you do have to be able to take it and keep smiling and deal with it professionally.

Just go and speak directly to your tutor - its the grown up mature thing to do if you have an issue and will prepare you for a real salon situation where we cant run away when dealing with difficult customers
 

Tinxy

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I disagree - a tutor is there to teach, support and mentor you. You need to know you can rely on them to help you and be there for you NOT for them to belittle or shout at you. A customer is a customer - we all know some of them can be difficult, but just as I wouldn't accept a customer shouting or trying to belittle me I wouldn't accept it from a tutor. In this case there IS a proper chain of reporting, follow it. If it was a customer I'd ban them.

I've been on client sites in my previous career and I've been hung out to dry by senior directors doing a U-turn on me and making it look like I had gone rogue when I was following directions (which I disagreed with in the first place!) - I was reduced to tears on several occasions and I can promise you that neither the board nor the investigating directors who presided over the resulting grievance hearings felt I was in the wrong.

If there is a 3rd party available to address a situation like this - use them. Often a "bully" doesn't realise the impact they are having but having someone else explain it to them will make them realise the severity of the situation and the damage they are doing not only to you but to their own reputation. If it's dealt with properly everyone will walk away wiser and non-the-worse for wear :)
 

temperleytan

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Why not just go and speak to your tutor directly?

Why go to someone higher ? What are you hoping to achieve?

In a professional salon you are going to be dealing with difficult customers and they are the customer so often you do have to be able to take it and keep smiling and deal with it professionally.

Just go and speak directly to your tutor - its the grown up mature thing to do if you have an issue and will prepare you for a real salon situation where we cant run away when dealing with difficult customers

hmmm....are you by any chance her tutor or work in the same college?

our industry is about making people feel good, and if you don't feel good in the environment, then that has to be addressed. I think you should note down all the things you have issues with, and perhaps ask for a meeting with her, and maybe another tutor or friend of yours, just for some back up and have an informal chat about it, she may not realise she is upsetting you, if nothing then changes you need to take it to the next level with her supervisor. We all have to take criticism, but should not have to deal with 'nastiness' or 'bullying' in any form x
 

WaxGirl

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hmmm....are you by any chance her tutor or work in the same college?

our industry is about making people feel good, and if you don't feel good in the environment, then that has to be addressed. I think you should note down all the things you have issues with, and perhaps ask for a meeting with her, and maybe another tutor or friend of yours, just for some back up and have an informal chat about it, she may not realise she is upsetting you, if nothing then changes you need to take it to the next level with her supervisor. We all have to take criticism, but should not have to deal with 'nastiness' or 'bullying' in any form x
lol no im not - i just think that people are too quick to bandy about the term bullying and perhaps from the perspective of the tutor she is just trying to get her students to produce excellent work - i had an extremely strict tutor and im so glad i did

i see many girls who trained with tutors who would have just passed anything and didnt put effort into making their students produce high standards of work and it just results in them having sloppy standards
 

lillamy

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I know how u feel. In my college theres a tutor who is like this................. Im really sorry she makes u feel like this. Instead of feeling little, feel sorry for her that she is so miserable that she has to pick on others. This will make u feel stronger. And do try to speak with her directly or with someone above her. Its not ok!
 

sparadise

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dylanpops

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you should not be made to feel like that. there are ways to speak to people to make your point and there are ways not to.

i agree with some of the comments but not all. yes, the stricter the tutor the better in my opinion but strict doesn't mean belittling people. when i trained many years ago ( i was a more mature student than some! in age that is) we had a tutor that everyone talked about for being strict. i have to say when i was put in her class i bottled it and withdrew from the massage course and stayed on the beauty. 3 years down the line i ended up with her being my tutor for my nvq assessors course. alls i can say is what a wonderful lady, tutor and mentor she was but yes very strict. i now wish that i hadn't listened to others all them years before.

my point being if you are there to teach those who want to learn, they still needed to be treated with respect and fairness, which in turn means conformity with rules or standards, true for both both sides. not shouted at or belittled.

there are procedures set in place when you have a grievance and if you feel the need to follow them then you should do so, if you feel you cannot resolve this with the tutor in question in person.

keep your chin up and keep on working well. good luck to you.

by the way that wonderful lady i spoke about was maxine whittaker :)
 

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