Anxiety eating me up

[hairstylist2010]

I'm self employed and starting to resent my job which has given me major anxiety issues. I had a client who wasn't happy with placement of a few foils so I said I'd remedy, moved my day around etc and then she moved the goal post, i offered alternatives but none suited. I've got a snotty message this morning saying she'll sort it elsewhere. I hate this - now i'm waiting for a shitstorm to erupt somewhere about my 'incompetence.' How do you cope with this sort of stuff? I've been qualified for 13 years, I'm a competent hairdresser but this sort of stuff royally eats me up.

 

[piersstanaway]

You win some and you loose some [emoji1]
Dont be too worried about it

 

[hairstylist2010]

You win some and you loose some [emoji1]
Dont be too worried about it

I've normally been like that but I feel like clients now seem to emotionally abuse a lot more than they used to, social media doesn't help because i know for a fact she could go online and spread a load of crap.

 

[ELLE BELLA]

I really feel for stylists starting out now , in this world of social media all it takes is one unsatisfied customer and it can really affect your reputation and your confidence ,
Work wise , I’ve totally opted out of the social media thing .
I don’t advertise and have a fairly good clientele , most that have been with me for a number of years , who trust me implicitly , I pick up a few along the way , mostly by reputation , and I dare say some have drifted off too !
If we can say that we have tried our absolute best , then that is all you can do , and try to think of the dozen s of satisfied customers you have , you can’t please everyone , no matter how good you are !

 

[hairstylist2010]

I really feel for stylists starting out now , in this world of social media all it takes is one unsatisfied customer and it can really affect your reputation and your confidence ,
Work wise , I’ve totally opted out of the social media thing .
I don’t advertise and have a fairly good clientele , most that have been with me for a number of years , who trust me implicitly , I pick up a few along the way , mostly by reputation , and I dare say some have drifted off too !
If we can say that we have tried our absolute best , then that is all you can do , and try to think of the dozen s of satisfied customers you have , you can’t please everyone , no matter how good you are !

Yeah totally - I am actually qualified in marketing and my clients love my social media posts and photos etc.

 

[RED STAR]

Yes...todays client is a whole new breed - a different level.

I've been in the industry forever....so feel qualified to advise you.....

IF you feel you can confidently deliver, over and above a basic trim/colour/blow out....THEN and only then can you take the next step.....

Many years ago when I was a wee apprentice, the stylist ALWAYS had the upper hand.

The client was in awe of their hairdresser....and understood that they were the PROFESSIONAL.
They would take the advise, and appreciate the opinion of their stylist.
THIS is where our industry has gone wrong.......

Poorly trained hairdressers.....producing substandard work = miss trust & disrespectful clients.......

We need to take back control/ownership, and be the best we can.....we need to take back our profession and EDUCATE our clients.

Get back in the driving seat

Sure, we won't all get along....that's life.
But what I now see, is the client dictating the odds....and the 'hairstylist' playing painting by numbers!

 

[CFBS]

Don't let one picky client get you down . If she goes elsewhere then that's for the best. Try to put it out of your mind and focus on your other lovely clients.
You can't win them all !

 

[ronray]

I'm self employed and starting to resent my job which has given me major anxiety issues. I had a client who wasn't happy with placement of a few foils so I said I'd remedy, moved my day around etc and then she moved the goal post, i offered alternatives but none suited. I've got a snotty message this morning saying she'll sort it elsewhere. I hate this - now i'm waiting for a shitstorm to erupt somewhere about my 'incompetence.' How do you cope with this sort of stuff? I've been qualified for 13 years, I'm a competent hairdresser but this sort of stuff royally eats me up.

How much of an asset was she to your buisness? You've done your best, you've tried to accommodate, it wasn't good enough.
Don't be upset, let her be someone else's problem! She's been your problem long enough.

 

[HairbyCass]

If she's changed the goalposts then you shouldn't redo her hair at your cost to the new target.
I think a client who would become so upset over a couple of misplaced foils (unless they were at the front, on her hairline and bled) isn't worth your worry.

You need to be able to hold yourself accountable if you make a mistake. Which it seems like you've tried to rectify - and she's still taken issue, which to me says she would have had an issue even if the job was perfect.

Walk the walk and talk the talk. Demand the respect you want and you will get it. Your time is your money and it seems as though you've given her enough. If she goes off on social media, politely reply with the thruth and that you attempted to rectify, she changes the goal and wouldn't allow you any further opportunity to make good.

 

[hairstylist2010]

If she's changed the goalposts then you shouldn't redo her hair at your cost to the new target.
I think a client who would become so upset over a couple of misplaced foils (unless they were at the front, on her hairline and bled) isn't worth your worry.

You need to be able to hold yourself accountable if you make a mistake. Which it seems like you've tried to rectify - and she's still taken issue, which to me says she would have had an issue even if the job was perfect.

Walk the walk and talk the talk. Demand the respect you want and you will get it. Your time is your money and it seems as though you've given her enough. If she goes off on social media, politely reply with the thruth and that you attempted to rectify, she changes the goal and wouldn't allow you any further opportunity to make good.

They didn't bleed, just fresh highlights against a new dark tint.

 

[finas]

Always be cordial when interacting with them. If they spread hate online, give a statement from your side and take everything politely so you'll show that you are the bigger person.

 

[vintagelover91]

She sounds like she’s after a refund - unfortunately we had a few clients in the salon I used to work in like that, they’d complain and complain but nothing you fixed was ever quite good enough.

I agree with the above [emoji1432]

I had a situation like this when I first went self employed. Now I took the step into being self employed because I wanted to only do the work I wanted to (I’m a terrible barber and hated being made to do gents cuts in my previous salons) and I wanted to be happy.
Now when my client was being tricky, I’d sometimes stay with her for over an hour longer than her allotted time slot trying to make her happy. I gave discounts and basically bent over backwards for her. She was never happy and just wanted to moan.

At one point she was such a pain that I even overcharged her hoping she wouldn’t come back - why go back to an expensive hairdresser who doesn’t do what you want? But, sure as shit, her messages popped up on my phone asking for an appointment. I was new and I wanted to make every penny I could so I did her hair and had her moan that I couldn’t cut her hair so it flicked, I couldn’t highlight her hair grey - and she never listened to my explanations of why.
I was miserable and ready to pick up full time hours in the care job I was using to subsidise my income.

Eventually, she threatened to go somewhere else, and whilst I was hurt, I told her that I was very sorry I couldn’t make her happy and that I was glad she wanted to go somewhere else as hopefully they will be able to make her happy. I was gracious and thankful for her custom, but firmly stated that I didn’t want to do her hair any more.
Soon she started messaging me for an appointment again - and I said no, and eventually I did something pretty unprofessional but I blocked her. From my work page, my personal page, and my phone number.

And instantly I felt relaxed. I didn’t need to worry about her. That chapter was over.

If, like me, you decided to become self employed to make yourself happier, remember this in your response to her. One unhappy client isn’t the end of the world. Don’t let it rain on your parade. Think of all the happy clients - I did a social media competition for my clients once to win a hair up and a pamper set , all they had to do was leave a review on my Facebook and one would be selected at random. After reading the entries I felt so much better about my work - let yourself have a little go boost. This woman clearly has an ulterior motive and is not a nice woman!