Perfecttennails
Well-Known Member
Hello all,
I am hoping that writing this, I may come across some other ladies in the same situation, who could advise on how to handle my mother in law!!
Me and my partner have been together for nine years; married for three. I have never been over keen on his mother, as she is one of these people who think that money solves everything. She has hardly worked throughout her life, as her and her husband came into some money, therefore have to have the best of everything and are real brand and name droppers! I have had a few run ins with her, my first one was when me and my husband got married. She wanted everything her way, she wanted me to get my dress from (X), she wanted this, she wanted that just because they put some money towards our wedding. I remember one occasion when she told me what favours she wanted me to have. I told her my idea which was different and she proceeded to sit on the sofa arm, strop and say "I don't know why you're bothering to ask me, you seem to have made your decisions".
She makes out all the time that she has all of these illnesses; back pain, fibromyalgia, depression...the list is exhaustive, yet with all of these things, they only come up when they suit her! She say she has chronic backache, yet she was happy wandering round in stiletto heels at my wedding all day? She ended up getting herself reported by somebody at my wedding for being a benefit fraud as she claims disability.
Anyway I'm not a fan of her, so I tend to keep my distance and she never shows any interest in me and my husband's life, which I find tragic, but it's her choice.
The only thing that bothers me is with my daughter who is now 18 months. My mum sees my daughter every week without fail, where as my mother in law has seen my daughter no more than 10 times in the 18 months she's been on the planet, she doesn't even phone on a regular basis to ask how she is or how we are! She lives the same distance away as my parents and shows plenty of interest in her daughters son; seeing him weekly and spoiling him all the time! It's now at the stage that my daughter doesn't even know who she is!
I have tried to sit down with her a couple of times and explain she isn't showing any interest in my daughters life and I'm not prepared to tolerate it but she then proceeds to switch on the waterworks which obversely guilts my husband into feeling sorry for her.
I sat down with her just before Christmas and I made it clear "if you don't make an effort now, you won't see her again" and was quite abrupt with her; even telling her to stop crying because I wasn't interested and I really thought I might have got through to her.
However, since Boxing Day, she has only seen her twice, one of those times was due to my husband taking her there.
I am really at my wits end and don't know what else to do???
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. It's a long winded story with lots more info so ask away with any further questions xx
I am hoping that writing this, I may come across some other ladies in the same situation, who could advise on how to handle my mother in law!!
Me and my partner have been together for nine years; married for three. I have never been over keen on his mother, as she is one of these people who think that money solves everything. She has hardly worked throughout her life, as her and her husband came into some money, therefore have to have the best of everything and are real brand and name droppers! I have had a few run ins with her, my first one was when me and my husband got married. She wanted everything her way, she wanted me to get my dress from (X), she wanted this, she wanted that just because they put some money towards our wedding. I remember one occasion when she told me what favours she wanted me to have. I told her my idea which was different and she proceeded to sit on the sofa arm, strop and say "I don't know why you're bothering to ask me, you seem to have made your decisions".
She makes out all the time that she has all of these illnesses; back pain, fibromyalgia, depression...the list is exhaustive, yet with all of these things, they only come up when they suit her! She say she has chronic backache, yet she was happy wandering round in stiletto heels at my wedding all day? She ended up getting herself reported by somebody at my wedding for being a benefit fraud as she claims disability.
Anyway I'm not a fan of her, so I tend to keep my distance and she never shows any interest in me and my husband's life, which I find tragic, but it's her choice.
The only thing that bothers me is with my daughter who is now 18 months. My mum sees my daughter every week without fail, where as my mother in law has seen my daughter no more than 10 times in the 18 months she's been on the planet, she doesn't even phone on a regular basis to ask how she is or how we are! She lives the same distance away as my parents and shows plenty of interest in her daughters son; seeing him weekly and spoiling him all the time! It's now at the stage that my daughter doesn't even know who she is!
I have tried to sit down with her a couple of times and explain she isn't showing any interest in my daughters life and I'm not prepared to tolerate it but she then proceeds to switch on the waterworks which obversely guilts my husband into feeling sorry for her.
I sat down with her just before Christmas and I made it clear "if you don't make an effort now, you won't see her again" and was quite abrupt with her; even telling her to stop crying because I wasn't interested and I really thought I might have got through to her.
However, since Boxing Day, she has only seen her twice, one of those times was due to my husband taking her there.
I am really at my wits end and don't know what else to do???
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. It's a long winded story with lots more info so ask away with any further questions xx
xx
