Really need some help

[crystaltash]

Hi geeks. I haven't been on for a while. I've had lots going on in my life and things haven't really been getting any better. I was due to get married last August and 5 weeks before the wedding my fiance called it all off. I had to move out of our house back to my parents. Basically my life fell apart and I didn't take time to deal with it. I had to keep on going with the salon (obviously) and I threw myself into Internet dating sites, meeting some very strange people and being let down again and again.
Before Christmas I thought I had finally met the perfect guy. Things were fab but then he went home to England for 2 weeks over Christmas and when he came back he told me that he had decided to sort his marriage out (I knew he was separated). That was the last straw and I have been feeling so low ever since. I have a history of depression and I had been doing so well...even come off my anti depressants. But now it's back with a vengeance and I just can't see the light. I know I have so much to be thankful for....my business, I bought my own house, my friends and I did have a lucky escape from marrying the wrong man because we weren't happy. But none of that makes a difference at the minute. It's such a struggle getting through each day and work is so hard having to put in a face pretending everything is fine. But obviously I don't want my business to suffer.
I just can't seem to get it out of my head that I'm too old now for anyone else to want me. I'm 32. All my friends are settled, married with kids, etc so it's not like I'm out all the time to meet someone else and working in female dominated industry doesn't help. I have come off all the sites because they weren't doing me any favours but now im totally alone and it's the first time I've had to face it and I'm scared. I love being in a relationship and I have so much love to give someone but I just dont know if I will ever meet anyone again.
I'm going to the doctor on Tuesday because I do need help. It's just so hard for anyone who hasn't had depression to understand.
Anyway, even writing this has helped a bit, so thank you salon geek. Hopefully the light at the end of the tunnel will come into view soon.
Xxx

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[sarah1992]

Sounds like you had a pretty rough time alright, but at least you are able to see all the positives that you still have in your life & hopefully you can focus on those things to keep you in the right direction.

What about seeing a councellor? They can really help especially if you said you feel better talking about it already they can give you a plan to keep you getting better.

Feel free to pm me if you want to talk more because I know what it is like feeling like that xx

 

[lores]

Sorry to hear of your past situations, but they are in the past now. Go to your GP get some support and work though it carefully to get back to feeling yourself.
Often the biggest part of the battle is recognising you need some support so well done. I am sending you a big salon geek hug, keep looking after yourself and in time things will improve.

All the best xxxxx:hug:

 

[ch-ela]

Depression.
Sometimes it's manageable. Sometimes with medication. Sometimes without. Sometimes it's really just a case of one step at a time, one hour at a time, one day at a time.

Don't be too hard on yourself. If you have recognised that you need some help and you are going to the doctor this week, then you are on the right track.
This wont be a good time for you to think too deeply about where you are in your life, so try to keep things light until you have seen the doctor. :hug:

 

[trooper_x]

I bought an apartment with my boyfriend in August and I've been going through depression and have just been diagnosed with PTS. He's told me he doesn't love me anymore and I've lost my new home and back with my parents and no job either. We both only 22 but I feel like I've lost the one. I feel so low but know I'll get through it and you will too. Every time just says take each day but it is hard. It's only been a week so still in shock. The positive is you have your business and that's amazing . I feel exactly like you I hate being single . Wish you lots of luck and happiness on the future you'll be fine xx

 

[persianista]

At 32 your life is just beginning, you certainly aren't too old.

 

[hazeleyes]

Definitely not too old- my dad met the love of his life at 49! Your still young and I know loads of people your age who are not yet settled down. Sometimes it just appears that way when we really want it ourselves!
X

 

[PinkSwoon]

God bless you, I admire you for standing up & admitting you have a problem, that takes real grit! I think it sounds like you don't give yourself enough attention though, learn to spoil yourself instead of relying on other people to make you feel good. Buy a completely juicy girly book (I like ones by Sophie Kinsella for easy reading!), do your nails, give yourself a facial, have a looong ass bath with Lush bubbles, candles & blinkin well enjoy it! Stop worrying about finding a man, I'm sure there will be plenty ladies on here willing to donate theirs I'm joking, but seriously, just let it happen in all of it's glorious serendipity.

 

[coco.]

Don't be so hard on yourself, you've had a lot of things happen to you and its probably knocked you for six.
As you've said you've suffered with depression before and got the help and managed to come off the tablets so I'm sure after abit of help you will come through this again.
You've got lots of things that are good going on in your life and even though you may not feel like it now, given a bit of time you will feel happy again.
Just give yourself the time you need and well done for taking the first step by going to see the doctor on Tuesday, I wish you all the best x