Description............?

[Michelle83]

Hi Everyone,

I have wrote a brief description (below) of what I do and would like to hear your thoughts on what I have written? Wheather it could do with spicing up a bit or anything else I should add?


Specialising in Gel Nail Extensions and Minx Nails.

I am a fully experienced, insured Beauty Therapist & Gel Nail Technician. I am based in Adlington working from my home salon.

I have been in the industry for 8 years and offer a very professional and friendly service.

I offer a fully comprehensive treatment list which I think suit most clients needs.

Please take a look and if you would like any more information or to book a treatment please email me or contact me on the number below.

Any comments will be appriciated.

Thank you

Michelle x

 

[shedunlop]

I think this is great. Precise and to the point. Probably the only thing that I would add would be that they will be in private surroundings, if you could incorporate that in some way. I had a client once who was worried it might be in my living room, I told her I couldn't do her there as she would be in the way of my husband's Top Gear!!

 

[EMMA AT ELITE]

Hi Michelle,
Where is this description going? On your website? Pricelist?
What is your business name?
I think it reads really good, I would just make the below tweaks.
I personally thinks it looks better if you use a date "2002" instead of "8 years" as you would need to edit this every year, whereas "2002" will always be that year - if that make sense.
I always think it looks nice to introduce yourself first so people know who you are & know your name. x:hug:x


Hello my nane is Michelle & I am a fully qualified, insured Beauty Therapist & Gel Nail Technician, Specialising in Gel Nail Extensions and Minx Nails. I am based in Adlington working from my private, relaxing home salon.

I have been in the industry since 2002 and offer a very professional and friendly service.

I offer a fully comprehensive treatment list which I think suit most clients needs.

Please take a look and if you would like any more information or to book a treatment please email me or contact me on the number below.

 

[Michelle83]

Ah thanks girls. That is brilliant. I shall tweek it now. It is for my description on my facebook page while I'm waiting for my website to be done. I think I am going to use this for my website too.

Thanks again