Pieces of your ex?

[Chickafish]

I've got a friend who still has her engagement ring from a previous relationship, even though she's been married for like 5 years now. And my other friend, his wife still has a ring given to her by her ex, and she was raging when he asked her to sell it because money was going to be tight for them and the kids for the next few months.

Now... maybe this is because all my exes were cheap SOBs, but I always just threw away, sell, gave away anything that was given to me by someone from a previous relationship. But those were nowhere near equivalent to expensive rings and things. In my opinion, jewelry is totally useless (unless it's a poison ring or something :lol: ), and the only thing it could possibly have is sentimental value. I wouldn't feel comfortable keeping something like that around, and I wouldn't expect my other half to be too happy about it either because I sure as **** wouldn't be too happy if he was keeping around things his exes gave him.

So what about you guys and gals?
Would you keep a ring/any jewelry given to you by an ex? If so, why?

 

[iconic]

Absolutely not! .. I would get rid of anything they gave me and wouldn't want anything around that would remotely remind me of them!! Plus, I too would be extremely upset and angry if my ex kept stuff given to him by an ex. Would make me think that he wasn't totally over the relationship x

 

[deanosnana]

I'm with you, Chicka.

I have nothing from any of my ex boyfriends. However, I have kept all the stuff from my ex husband (aka; the father of my dear children) as when I die, my kids will have something their dad gave their mom.

Forgot to add: I never wear this jewelry, just keeping it for my kids.

I worked with a gal once who kept and WORE jewelry from another man even though she was married. I thought that was just SO tacky!

 

[happyfeet]

In the past whenever I have split from someone I have binned absolutely everything. However months down the line, as shallow as it may sound, I could have kicked myself as some of it was great stuff that I should have kept and used! So for me the question is: are you keeping it because of sentimental reasons? Or are you keeping it because you like/need/want to use the item- no strings attached? For me it would always be no strings attached.

 

[gr8nailz]

When my 30 year marriage ended, I left most of the jewelry my ex-husband had given me at the house when I moved out. Didn't want any remembrance of the man or the times. The only exception was my engagement ring and wedding band. It was a strategic omission.

I plan on giving those to my son and my future daughter-in-law to fund a wedding, honeymoon or to use as a down payment on a new home....whatever their hearts desire.

However, I wouldn't have minded taking pieces of my ex....out of the house....in garbage bags...to the local land fill.

 

[Chickafish]

See I can understand if they're being kept for the kids for whatever reason, but I don't understand the whole keeping it around with no valid reason. Seems mean to their current partners.

 

[gr8nailz]

See I can understand if they're being kept for the kids for whatever reason, but I don't understand the whole keeping it around with no valid reason. Seems mean to their current partners.

Some people feel that each relationship brought something valuable to their lives so maybe in that respect, they want to keep a piece of it. However, it would take a strong partner to feel cool about that. Perhaps discretion is the word here?

I certainly wouldn't want my new partner to have mementos of his previous relationships all up in my face.

 

[X18WAT]

depends how much i thought of him, i always wear a necklace my other half gave me for my 18th and if me and him ever spit up il throw it away if we're on bad times or il keep it if we end on good terms. being honest id probably keep it anyway because i have a whole box of memories with him as he means alot to me and we've been through hell and back and he'll always mean something to me. but if i was to marry someone else i would dispose xx

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[Chickafish]

Some people feel that each relationship brought something valuable to their lives so maybe in that respect, they want to keep a piece of it. However, it would take a strong partner to feel cool about that. Perhaps discretion is the word here?

I certainly wouldn't want my new partner to have mementos of his previous relationships all up in my face.

Me neither! I shrunk a pair of hand-knitted wool socks and I felt bad about it until I found out it came from the ex's grandma. After I found that out I was like "dang! I should've shrunk it sooner... and on purpose!"

 

[Baggybear]

I would not be bothered if my boyf had or has kept things from past relationships if the memories the items hold/evoke are plesant ones of that time.

In fact there were a few packs of photo's that turned up when we were packing up his things to move them (from his mum's to mine) and some of them were of him and his ex in a pub they ran together, not just any old ex though one that I actuall know and one that cheated on him and really, really hurt him. I just left them for him to deal with them - keep or throw whatever he decided. They then sat on a windowsill in plain sight at our house for about 3 months until I asked him if he could find a home for them and he put the whole lot in the bin. I asked him if that was really what he wanted to do with them and he said yes they hold bad memories and I want to bin them.

I would not have been overjoyed at the idea of keeping those photos but if he had wanted to I would have allowed him to, he obviously needed to deal with things before he could throw them away and that took him a good few years (it was a few years after they split that we got together).

I trust my boyfriend 100% and because of that I wouldn't have any worries about inanimate objects.

I still live in the same house I did with my ex-husband and therfore lots of things that were here back then are still here now and my boyfreind has never asked me to get rid of anything (I did buy myself a new bed as soon as I split from my ex though, & I know that was me wanting rid of some memories lol).

 

[Crystal colleen]

My mum kept her wedding ring and engagement ring when him and my old man (dad) divorced but only to give them to me she gave them to me and I lost um lol.

I have never kept anything from xs I threw the lot out and anything that was in the house of there's I burned or binned or ripped up lol.

If I was with someone and they had kept little keep sakes they would be getting a toe up the whole (unless it was something very expensive that we could sell lmao).

 

[wonderwoman]

no no no! i cant do it to myself! keeping it would remind me of the SOB. Its time i cant get back so i wouldnt want to keep any reminders of him. gifts/ tokens of affection, if you feel they have a worth then keep them, but for me i would rather have a clean slate! ive got a frined who i refer to as the black widow, keeps getting engaged then dumping them, she acts like a sugar daddy and compares each ring. Deep down she is more materialistic that wifey material. shes only ever been single for 3 weeks! xoxo

 

[Tomme]

I'd just flog it if it wasn't for kids or grand kids.my mum tried to sell a necklace for its gold but was told it was more valuable as a necklace because of the diamonds, her engagement ring on the other hand.... Cubic zirconia! Xoxo

 

[tobl55]

My mum kept her engagement ring for me and my sister. Only for her to come to give it to us and find it had been robbed..along with a pocketwatch of our great grandads.


An old friend split up with her boyfriend of 2 years and asked for everything he had given to her. Including Valentines cards. That's the last thing I'd want to keep!


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[lozenja]

I'll go against most and say I have kept lots of ex boyfriends things. None of them ended badly and i think they are lovely people. I def dont want to be with them at all and dont wear any of the jewellery (nothing of much value) but keep for sentimental reasons.

My hubby knows I adore him (we have been together for 11yrs) and im having our baby any moment. I dont think he minds at all that I keep things and photos of my past. And I would encourage him to keep his too. We both trust each other and love each other too much to worry about the past!

Besides the only jewellery i wear is a beautiful solitare diamond engagement ring with wedding band that hubby gave me. My clients always comment on it as i never take it off

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[Jen889]

I threw out (shredded) cards, notes etc from my ex but I still have a garbage bag full of teddy bears and stuff plus a pair of earrings and ring from my ex. I left them at my moms house when I moved in with my boyfriend over two years ago.

Now I have to throw those bears out but what do I do with the earrings a ring their nice but won't get much money lol

 

[greenreader29]

I think it goes to if your sentimental or not or maybe a pack rat or worst case a hoarder. Lol but Seriously though , I gave away a ring from an ex that I wore everyday for 4 years and when my husband found out where it came from he wanted it gone. I loved that ring and gave it to my best friend from high school. My hubby bought me a new ring for that finger but I've never really gotten over the loss of that ring. 25 years
and several gorgeous rings later i still long for that ring. I recently looked into having the ring made so i can
have it back. love my marriage

 

[PixieBeauty]

My ex & I extended our mortgage to pay for our wedding, rings & honeymoon. I got to pick my perfect ring. We split up before the wedding & I ended up taking over the whole mortgage just to get rid of him. Kept the ring just as it was financially very valuable.

With my new fella & discussing marriage, I said to him I actually own & have personally paid for my dream engagement ring. We could sell it & he could buy me something less valuable that he has chosen, or he could use my old one, which we both wanted to do. He's had it engraved and polished to change the finish so it's come from him. I just couldn't bear having my 'dream' engagement ring wasted on a complete SOB and having to wear a second rate design for the rest of my life with the guy I want to be with.

I am not materialistic in ANY aspect of my life except this one - and I'm really grateful he's letting me be materialistic & use my old ring. I think it's pretty clear there's no sentiment there - hell I designed & even paid for the damn thing!

I'm expecting a fair few comments though from friends & family! Do I give a ****?

Great thread Xx

Ps eveything else I chucked in the skip, apart from eight bottles of engagement gift champagne we had been given...I enjoyed those with my girlfriends

 

[ChelseaNails]

My ex gave me a tiffany necklace for my birthday and I kept it and wore it all the time, but when I got together with my current partner (4 years yesterday ) I stopped wearing it and just kept it in the box and eventually sold it, last year I think.

But because of that, he won't buy me anything tiffany! sad times.

He has bought me a ton of awesome stuff that I wouldn't get rid of if we did break up, like my phone, ipad, shoes...
infact pretty much everything I own now has been either bought by or influenced by him so if we broke up and my new fella didn't want anything of him around I'd need a complete new wardrobe... And 2 cats! :S lol x

 

[Ashleigh_21x]

I have a memory box at my mums, and looked through it recently. There were cards and other pieces of junk my ex gave me, I threw the whole lot. It was a bad relationship, I just totally forgot it was all there.

On the other hand my oh has a watch his ex gave him, and he doesn't want it, his mum always insists on him wearing it to social and family events. It doesn't really bother me, as I know he's doing it to keep his mum happy, he actually tried to sell it recently but got nowhere. Only thing that annoys me about it is when he has it on or the box is out he talks about the past relationship with her (which wasn't a good one either) Frustrating lol I soon get him told ladies 😉 I do see why some people would hold onto things from ex's, especially for kiddies!