Bullying

[virtues2011]

What a horrible thing to happen. In my opinion name calling, personal comments etc, NO place for them in the work setting. I had a lovely job and a lovely manager where I worked and they would never of lowered themselves to getting involved with any spats amongst staff, let alone join in with it, would not have been tolerated, so it never happened. Sorry to go off on another subject but my friend ( not in this industry) was telling me about a man at her work making derogatory sexual comments, swearing, mocking her for being a single mum and she is too worried to say anything to her boss! So stupid! A decent business would not allow this, who has time for it, you are supposed to be working not thinking up ways of bullying the staff. For her well being its best she has left. But I still think you should report it to someone xxx

Why on earth doesn't she start by telling the bloke that she is not happy with his comments? Your friend is clearly upset, if he isn't told he will continue, probably finds nothing wrong with his comments and I would take a guess he says these things as he finds it funny. Sometimes if people don't realise what they are saying upsets others it continues, in instances like this your friend telling him that she will report it to her Manager probably will be the end of the situation.

True bullies will not be phased and will step the harassment up. To me this instance isn't at the bullying stages. I'm confident if she stood up for herself to this man it would stop with an apology. I've seen it so many times. Tell your friend to be assertive!

You say a decent business would not allow it - how would they know?

 

[sarahpoppy24]

VBLike you said true bullies will step the harassment up. He is above her in his role and just hates women, bitter person. She likes others there and doesn't want to cause a stir up or risk it getting worse and have to leave. Also maybe I don't mean a decent business that's a bit general maybe I mean a decent person as I think people who bully/say derogatory thing or allow other to do this things aren't decent people. I've told her to stand up to him and be assertive myself, I'm sure it will all work out x

 

[virtues2011]

VBLike you said true bullies will step the harassment up. He is above her in his role and just hates women, bitter person. She likes others there and doesn't want to cause a stir up or risk it getting worse and have to leave. Also maybe I don't mean a decent business that's a bit general maybe I mean a decent person as I think people who bully/say derogatory thing or allow other to do this things aren't decent people. I've told her to stand up to him and be assertive myself, I'm sure it will all work out x

I really hope so, there is no excuse for it in the work place. I suppose I find myself becoming a little agitated for others who can't speak up for themselves if they need to. I want to help her myself....but because he's in a higher position really has no resemblance to him finding these sort of comments a form of humour.

I worked with an old sweaty director many years ago, who loved talking to your chest when he spoke to you, made you feel uncomfortable..always passed comment on one particular staff member - this particular day he made a comment to me about her and I told him quite rudely he was nothing but a dirty old man... ha ha ..then scarpered quickly back to my office. He never done it again.

 

[sarahpoppy24]

Lol! Dirty old man! I'm sure my mate will be fine! Hope the OP daughter is ok now she left that job and gets on to better things! Xxx