Should I tell my mum?

[LaurenSparkles]

Hi

Need some advice. I'm a 25 year old adult and yesterday I decided to have juvaderm in my lips. It looks fantastic and everyone that knows loves it. My lips are still quite swollen as expected which will go down in a couple of days.

I'm an only child to a tiny family and I knew my mum & dad would go wild. So yesterday they came around mine and the first thing my mum said was 'oh my god' and my dad looked at me in sheer disgust. I just said oh it's lip voltage (what a load of tosh) she said you better have not had your lips done. I just said of course I haven't. You could of cut the tension with a knife!

She later text me saying how are your lips, why can't you ever just be happy. Bla bla.

Now I'm having a nose job in jan which they are fine with. However I just feel like if they know iv had my lips done they will go crazy.

It's rediculas I'm a 25 year old adult!!

I think because I'm an only child and really close I don't want to upset them but it's my life to choose what I want to do.

Should I pretend iv had an allergic reaction or should I just tell them?
I'm such a chicken. My parents are so old fashion they just think il look like Pete burns.

Help xx

 

[Joannedesouza41]

In my opinion your mum clearly loves you for who you are! She wouldn't want you to change and clearly wants you to be happy with yourself. If they will die down I wouldn't tell her this time however next time maybe tell her before, like your nose job, so she knows and there will be no hurt. Obviously I don't know you but that's what it sounds like xxx

Beleza Beauty ♡

 

[Scottishsarah]

Sounds like you are feeling a bit guilty about misleading your folks.
They love you and you might as well be honest.
The filler won't last forever, and having had it done once you are in the best place to decide if it's a treatment to continue with (sounds like you love it!)
But also, your mum sounds a bit like she sees you as still being her wee girl. You can make your own decisions and she doesn't get to influence them, whatever her opinion may be.

Let us know what you end up doing, and all the best with the nose op! x

Sent from my HTC Desire X using SalonGeek mobile app

 

[user 99628]

Well I'm 30 still live at home and I can't even tell them about going on dates .. I'd never hear the end of it and them being nosey! I'd say say nothing is the best way for an easy life! Not worth the hassle! x

 

[Penny Vintage]

I know how you feel to a certain point, I have a tattoo on my wrist that I just can't show my nan. I see her a lot and I have to wear one of those injury/sports wrist things to cover it lol! I had a bad wrist years ago so I just tell her that I always wear it. I'm 28 nearly but I know she'd go mad. I've got away with it for 6 years so hey, why rock the boat lol.
I wouldn't tell her and next time just say about it before you have it done.

 

[gillian w]

I would also go nuts if my daughter had fillers or Botox I had no problem with her nose job which she had at 21 she is now 23,but to me fillers or Botox at such a young age is going to get any sensible parents ranting.

 

[facelashbrow]

If you were my friend I would say that they need to let you grow up and even if they show theur displeasure to be mature about it, its your body, and for you to tell them so. I'd think you should do whatever you want to them.

However if it was my daughter I'd be upset that she wasn't happy with herself the way she is because i think she's beautiful and I would hate for anything to go wrong. I just love her too much!

Sent from my GT-I9505 using SalonGeek mobile app

 

[salj]

When I had my last tattoo my mum didn't speak to me for a week and I'm 35!!. But you're an adult and it's your body to do with as YOU please.

They might be upset for a while but they will get over it.

 

[LaurenSparkles]

Well she text me last night. 'Il ask you one...have you had you lips done'

So I just text back saying yes. I'm old enough to make my own decisions. When you saw me they were swollen and at their worst. However it's my choice and I have my reasons'

No reply and no doubt we won't speak now. Hopefully she will be mature enough to not ruin Christmas (sometimes I think parents are more child like).

I'm really standing my ground on this one I won't be spoken to like I'm a 5 year old. I can do what I want, I live on my own and I'm an adult. She can like it or lump it.

If I didn't do anything she didn't like I wouldn't be me x

 

[blossom]

my daughters are still in their teens but if it was one of them i would rather they be honest and even if it was something i wasnt 100% on, ultimately its their body and their choice (and their money lol)

what do you think is troubling your mum about it? (and whats dads take on it?)

is it that she's always adored you the way you are and is genuinely disturbed that you want to change yourself

is she worried where it will lead, as you read about one thing leading to another and she might be concerned what else you will have - again your choice but do you think she's worried about money or risks?

are your lips exactly like hers naturally so she's taking it as a personal insult?

is it a generational thing, that you're just not reading from the same page?

does she see it as a sexual thing and can't accept or is uncomfortable with the fact that you're a fully grown woman?

maybe if you can try and get to the bottom of what her problem is, it might help you sort it between you.

when all's said and done its not worth not speaking or falling out over, try and talk it all through calmly x

 

[salj]

Well she text me last night. 'Il ask you one...have you had you lips done'

So I just text back saying yes. I'm old enough to make my own decisions. When you saw me they were swollen and at their worst. However it's my choice and I have my reasons'

No reply and no doubt we won't speak now. Hopefully she will be mature enough to not ruin Christmas (sometimes I think parents are more child like).

I'm really standing my ground on this one I won't be spoken to like I'm a 5 year old. I can do what I want, I live on my own and I'm an adult. She can like it or lump it.

If I didn't do anything she didn't like I wouldn't be me x

Good for you. I know it's hard to feel like an adult when your parents do stuff like this.

For me I know my mum hates tattoos and with my others she kind of got over it, but this one is bigger and on my inner forearm. In the end my dad said to me that I needed to talk to her and make a mends and I said I'd tried but she wouldn't talk to me. She had no right to be angry and it was unfair of her to treat me like I'd done something to personally hurt her. I think he had a word because by that night she was speaking to me.

I know it's super frustrating, but all you can do is let her be mad for a bit and then hopefully you can appeal to her reasonable side or make her realise that she doesn't really have the right to be angry over a decision YOU made about YOUR body.

Plus these things are temporary right? Unlike a big eff off mermaid tattoo!! hahaa

 

[endless]

I started having filler in my top lip, when I was 22, I felt I needed it, everyone else dissagreed, tried to talk me out of it, but I did it anyway,and loved it! I've been having it done ever since,and I'm 30 now, my brothers made lots of Pete burns jokes etc, I didn't care, then at 25, I had my boobs done, I told my family,and they all said I would be an embarrassment to them, did I want to be a porn Star, all that rubbish, i was also working as a model at the time,so think they probably thought i was doing it because if this,i did it anyway,and love them too, I've just started Botox treatments, as a preventative, and my argument to it all is, its my body, I work hard, I'm a decent person, I don't drink, smoke, or take drugs,so ill do what I want,when I want,as long as I'm not hurting myself, its no one else's business, my family have come round, I hope yours do too xx

 

[jamiereid92]

I would also go nuts if my daughter had fillers or Botox I had no problem with her nose job which she had at 21 she is now 23,but to me fillers or Botox at such a young age is going to get any sensible parents ranting.

I don't understand why you think a nose job is more acceptable thanks botox or fillers? I thought the botox and fillers are just to maintain a youthful look. Whereas a nose job is actually changing your physical appearance permanently. Unless she had an accident, surely this is more worrying as to her confidence levels, and the way she sees herself in the mirror x

Sent from my HTC One using SalonGeek mobile app

 

[gillian w]

I don't understand why you think a nose job is more acceptable thanks botox or fillers? I thought the botox and fillers are just to maintain a youthful look. Whereas a nose job is actually changing your physical appearance permanently. Unless she had an accident, surely this is more worrying as to her confidence levels, and the way she sees herself in the mirror x

Sent from my HTC One using SalonGeek mobile app

Because a nose job is a one off.Whereas fillers and Botox are ongoing and I don't like the idea of injecting something regularly,possibly for years into a young healthy body.
I'm not judging anyone that does,that's fine,but like I check the E numbers on my food etc to try and not put crap in our bodies,I don't like the idea for me or my loved ones,but if other people want to do it then that's fine.

 

[Angelaznailz]

Don't be too hard on her. You are, and always will be, her daughter. Her baby. The centre of her universe.....whatever age you are !
A Nose job is probably something you have been on about for years (I'm from an Italian family and it's our default topic of conversation at family meals !!!!!! )
However, she might not have heard you mentioning lip fillers and it's come as more of a shock to her.
To break the ice before Christmas, why not send her a photo of your (hopefully) now settled lips and tell her that you were only trying it out for curiosity.
Good luck. X