Advice please, client's mum on warpath

[HairyGeek]

I think it's only nurses, drs, lawyers that are bound by confidentiality except if the information could lead to and act it terrorism or harm to a child? Something along those lines.

Morally you couldn't have told the mother, then she would have wondered who else you had told due to the awful reputation we have for gossiping at work xxx

 

[jojo77]

Sorry for late reply . I think every one agrees you were 100% right . I would just leave it xx

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[mollie1985]

Thanks everyone, the daughter txt me this morning to see if I was ok which I thought was nice of her, says her mum is still fuming and isn't speaking to her so definitely right that I leave it, thanks again everyone x

 

[JH_92]

Thanks everyone, the daughter txt me this morning to see if I was ok which I thought was nice of her, says her mum is still fuming and isn't speaking to her so definitely right that I leave it, thanks again everyone x

You were in a no-win situation...which ever course of action you took would've resulted in one of them getting very angry!

You were completely in the right, the daughter is an adult and is very capable of making her own decisions...and choosing who she confides in.

The mother is probably more upset and hurt that her daughter couldn't speak to her than she is angry at you...she probably feels like she's let her daughter down and she's projecting that onto you.

Don't worry Mollie, I would've done exactly the same. Don't let this situation spoil your christmas! 😆

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[domz85]

Seems you may have taken some of the blow back from the mother aimed at thr daughter. . Things will definately calm down over time... at the end of the day if you had told the mum the daughter would have felt even more alone and never would trust anyone... now she has learnt that she kept it from her mother for a reason and she can trust you and the mother will have realised that she is unapproachable and hopefully they are able to get something positive out of this!! If not then its not your problem you did the right thing in my opinion....

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[Tomtomrow]

I think you were fab not to say anything well done. It wasnt your place x

 

[Lady Murasaki]

I think it's only nurses, drs, lawyers that are bound by confidentiality except if the information could lead to and act it terrorism or harm to a child? Something along those lines.

Morally you couldn't have told the mother, then she would have wondered who else you had told due to the awful reputation we have for gossiping at work xxx

This not the case, the data protection of 1998 act covers all business types etc and you can be sued/prosecuted if you are found in breach of the data protection act.

If it was me I would of said to the mother ' I understand this must be a upsetting time for you, but I'am unable to discuss the matter further with you due your daughter being over 18 and due to data protection act of 1998 which I am legally obliged to follow/adhere to.

This is clearly a family matter and for professional reasons I do not wish to involved in this any further.

If you can not respect this or carry on harassing me, then I will have to ask you &/or your daughter to find another stylist'

Then I would of sent it in an email with a link to the data protection act.

In the mothers defence, she is upset, angry and looking for someone to blame. So rather than address her feelings with her daughter she is projecting her emotions & anger on you.

In the meantime I would be seriously reconsidering whether to have either or both of them as clients as the position they both have put you in is not a nice one.

 

[Vicky X]

All salons and staff have a responsibility to their clients to keep all personal information private and confidential. This includes anything they may discuss during appointments etc.

Breaking these rules could result in fines, loss of job etc so legally you did the right thing. I also think you definitely done the right thing morally.

Your contract of employment may elaborate more on any specifics relating to the Data Protection Act but all work places are under this act in one way or another.

As said previously, try not to let this get to you too much. You done what any decent person in your position would do. It can't have been an easy decision but I definitely think it was the right one.

X.

X.

 

[AcidPerm]

Sorry, but relating this issue to the Data Protection Act is a bit of a red herring, in my opinion. The Act relates to the information you record about clients, not about the conversations you have with them.

Mollie, don't beat yourself up, you did the right thing. I'm sure given time, the mum will calm down and realise how lucky her daughter is having been able to confide in someone as caring and considerate as you are.

 

[jenny miles]

Also you didn't ask to be told this information, as you said, you were just there at a time she needed to talk! You did the right thing, it wasn't your place to tell the mum. Hope you're ok and feeling a bit better now.xxx

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[Vicky X]

Sorry, but relating this issue to the Data Protection Act is a bit of a red herring, in my opinion. The Act relates to the information you record about clients, not about the conversations you have with them.

Mollie, don't beat yourself up, you did the right thing. I'm sure given time, the mum will calm down and realise how lucky her daughter is having been able to confide in someone as caring and considerate as you are.

Yes it includes telephone number, address etc but it also covers details of services carried out and information given during consultations etc.

X.

 

[mollie1985]

Thanks everyone for replies, yes I was a little unsure if the data protection as I obviously knew details hadn't to be breached but like someone said conversations but I just always take it that anything a client tells you should never be repeated as it's confidential, I did say to the mum about client confidentiality and that I couldn't break that but that's when she started going on about how many years I had done their hair and how she thought of me as a friend as well as their hairdresser.
She also cancelled her Xmas app with me so if I don't hear from her before Xmas then she's obviously went somewhere else but to be honest I would be glad as I'm not sure I could face the atmosphere even If she did apologise xx

 

[jamiereid92]

It's true you don't need clients or "friends" that send you abusive messages like that. Obviously she is very upset and going through a hard time, but that is no excuse. If she hasn't calmed down and apologized profusely I wouldn't book either of them in again. Why did the daughter need to tell the mum she had told you?

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[pinkcouture]

Am I the only one who thinks the daughter threw you under the bus a bit? Did she really have to tell her mum she had told you? Even if the mum hadn't got so annoyed it still would have made things a bit awkward i think as you and the mum might both have known but neither of you would want to bring it up so it would have caused an atmosphere anyway? Im sure the daughter could have said she had told a friend without actually telling her mum who the friend was. You have been put in an awful position and I think you handled it well.

 

[HairyGeek]

This not the case, the data protection of 1998 act covers all business types etc and you can be sued/prosecuted if you are found in breach of the data protection act.

If it was me I would of said to the mother ' I understand this must be a upsetting time for you, but I'am unable to discuss the matter further with you due your daughter being over 18 and due to data protection act of 1998 which I am legally obliged to follow/adhere to.

This is clearly a family matter and for professional reasons I do not wish to involved in this any further.

If you can not respect this or carry on harassing me, then I will have to ask you &/or your daughter to find another stylist'

Then I would of sent it in an email with a link to the data protection act.

In the mothers defence, she is upset, angry and looking for someone to blame. So rather than address her feelings with her daughter she is projecting her emotions & anger on you.

In the meantime I would be seriously reconsidering whether to have either or both of them as clients as the position they both have put you in is not a nice one.

Are you sure? Having a conversation in a salon doesn't feel like a data protection issue. I do think it's important not to talk about anyone's personal issues but in this context I don't think it's the same. If the OP had been her Dr then yes... But her hair dresser?

You have a responsibility to keep your written records of clients safe and confidential. Not sure where you stand with regards to conversations.

Drs and nurses also have a code of conduct covering these aspects of confidentiality.

 

[HairyGeek]

Sorry guys I didn't finish reading the rest of the comments and have just realised I have repeated what's already been said.

 

[jamiereid92]

Am I the only one who thinks the daughter threw you under the bus a bit? Did she really have to tell her mum she had told you? Even if the mum hadn't got so annoyed it still would have made things a bit awkward i think as you and the mum might both have known but neither of you would want to bring it up so it would have caused an atmosphere anyway? Im sure the daughter could have said she had told a friend without actually telling her mum who the friend was. You have been put in an awful position and I think you handled it well.

No I agree with you, she didn't need to tell her she had told anyone. This is why I said unless they apolagize and are both genuinely sorry then don't rebook them in. Do you socialize with them outside of hair appointments? If not then she is not your friend she is your client, and shouldn't be expected to be treated any differently x

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[mollie1985]

Thanks everyone, yeah I did think to myself "did you really need to tell her you told me" but I know she's been going through so many emotions and I think she probably now regrets saying it was me, think that's why she txt apologising, I don't blame her as it must be difficult time for her(she was on contraception by the way so it really has been a genuine accident) but I know she's feeling upset, angry, guilty everything.

I don't think il hear from the mum again and I don't know about the daughter having her hair done again as I go to the family home to do their hair but I'm not going to let it bother me anymore, having discussed it with you all I know now I was 100% in the right so Thankyou all so much xx