Client with possible ADHD or ADD

[VHunter]

Ok, another client thread. Sorry.

I have a young client. 21yrs old.
Lovely girl. Beautiful heart. Good sense of humour and very generous and considerate of others.

BUT...

Everytime I'm expecting her.. I get all tense and my hubby runs to hide.

I "think" she has adult ADD or ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or some such?)
First, she can never sit still. I'm forever chasing her hands around the table. When she talks, she's bouncing and flailing the other hand around, so that the one I'm working on is never steady and a right nightmare to do french's on, with all the moving about. She smudges ALL the time.
She touches and plays with everything. She talks in a 'baby' voice, all squeaky and it drives me MAD.
She also shrieks. For everything, as if I'm killing her. I don't get it. She is the ONLY client that ever squawks. Yes, it does rarely happen with a new file 'oops', I catch the eponychium by accident. But she squawks when I haven't done anything, even. She carries on, like it's all a big drama for every single finger. If it's THAT uncomfortable, then DON'T COME. I shudder to think how she'd carry on at the NSS All my other clients rave how gentle I am, and cautious. I mean, I've probably drawn blood with a file maybe 3 times in 4 years? It's part of why I'm so slow, I'm so careful. It's part of why I became a tech, I was tired of being hurt.

And every 2nd word out of her mouth is "F**k". At the top of her lungs. NOw, don't get me wrong. I do swear. I'm no saint. BUT not often and NOT in the earshot of my children. I am repeatedly asking her to watch her language because my children are in earshot. It seems to go in one ear and out the other.

A longtime client who referred the hyper client to me, once asked "how are you getting on with so-n-so". I said, "well, she keeps me on my toes". The client smiled and said yes, she is rather hyper and a tad much at times. Just tell her to cut it out (the one that referred her has watched her grow up, so she's like an aunt to her). She said don't be afraid to give her what-for if she's being ridiculous. Keeping in mind, I never complained about her, this is the advice that she offered.
SHE even said, without comment from me that she thinks so-n-so needs ritalin (med used to treat hyperactivity in children). I just quietly nodded and left it at that.

I've reached the point I dread her appointments, but I do like her as a person. Doing her nails stresses me out to no end, and I usually don't book anyone after her as I'm so high strung and by that time, fighting with keeping in my temper and patience, she drives me so mad. It really is, like dealing with a hyper 5yr old. I feel like putting her in time-out for not listening!
Even my hubby will come to me and complain "oh god, did she book again? I can't stand her!" etc....

What do I do? I have tried talking to "so-n-so", asking her repeatedly to sit still etc etc etc... But I'm not getting through to her.
I'm frustrated to no end. She wears me right out!

How do I talk to her, without offending her and making it understood that she needs to calm down and quit bouncing about and shrieking and swearing for nothing?
She gets me so mad, I want to smack her sometimes. How awful is that??

Any advice would be appreciated!:hug:

 

[Bagpuss]

How do I talk to her, without offending her and making it understood that she needs to calm down and quit bouncing about and shrieking and swearing for nothing?
Any advice would be appreciated!:hug:

I don't think you can hun....its not our job to bring to clients attention all the things that annoy us about them...

I have a few that bug the hell outta me but i just have to sit and think "hell we are all different...they probably have hang ups on me too...its once a month and i don't have to live with them"

even mates sometimes say stuff or do stuff and think its off...but just cos its not my way don't mean its not the norm.

and i wouldn't pick them up on it either...its just not my place to go telling people how they should and shouldn't behave...if its life threatning....against the law or cruel then yeah i would ... but its just different personalities..

 

[dee]

i think it depends on how she is as a person , is she open to suggestions etc....
maybe you could get her "aunt" to get her seen by a doc ? or other than that if you hate it so much hun , just tell her you are fully booked ,
although i feel for her if she does have it coz she wont be able to help being so hyper its just how they are .
hope you get it sorted hun x

 

[hayls]

I don't think you can hun....its not our job to bring to clients attention all the things that annoy us about them...

I have a few that bug the hell outta me but i just have to sit and think "hell we are all different...they probably have hang ups on me too...its once a month and i don't have to live with them"

even mates sometimes say stuff or do stuff and think its off...but just cos its not my way don't mean its not the norm.

and i wouldn't pick them up on it either...its just not my place to go telling people how they should and shouldn't behave...if its life threatning....against the law or cruel then yeah i would ... but its just different personalities..

I agree with Angie, just do the best job you can, while being nice and smiley all the while!
I have 3 clients who really get my goat, one is an emotional wreck - she comes for an express mani once a month, this should take me no longer than 35 minutes but she is with me for atleast 2 hours , she is always booked in as my last client of the day! Another is just plain mean, she bitches about everybody, people I know and I just sit and nod, I breath a huge sigh of relief when she goes! And then the last who thinks she knows better than I do about nails, she says at the end of every appointment (she has been with me for over 1 year and comes every 2 weeks) 'its easy isnt it, I could do this with my eyes closed!' I just fake a laugh in a 'ho ho ho' sort of way, take her money and restrain myself from booting her up the jacksie on her way out the door!

Just get on with it, I would, I do! :lol:

 

[annemac]

She is not ADHD that it from some one who has a son with it. He is now 16yrs old and I read the thread to him and he she is not ADHD as well. ADHD is so much more than being fidgety and hyper.But if you do want any info on it pm me and I will get it for you. People with ADHD are very hard work, like my son but with the hard work they can be wonderful people. xxx

 

[VHunter]

Ohhh she IS a wonderful person!!
I never said otherwise! She is very very sweet!

She just drives bonkers, with the movement, and the speaking as fast as speedy-gonzalez, and yelling, and not sitting still, playing with everything and moving my stuff around.... Almost like she's jacked up on mega amounts of caffeine.

Ok, I guess for now I'll bite my tongue and be thankful that she's a lovely person and just try to nap before her appointments to fortify myself. I don't know how else to deal. Short of videotaping it, I can't explain it very well.

Thanks anyway!!
:hug:

 

[annemac]

My son drives me mad, still after 16yrs. Is it like she has a couple of durcell batteries up her axx. If so she may just be hyperactive because that is what it sounds like. With ADHD you wouldn't be able to keep her in the chair let alone do her nails. My son is doing his exams at the moment and they have had to make special allowances for him, as he can't sit that long. ADHD and Hyperactive people often get mixed together but there are differences, it does that alot of patience's and alot of tongue biting. sorry I can't help anymore, but if you do want any info then pm me and I will try my best. xxx

 

[sam1]

Have you tried telling her that you won't do her nails anymore? Might scary her in to behaving. If you can't be that blunt, you could give her something like a stress ball to "play" with so she has something else to concentrate on(we use this in my son"s class as he fidgets and disrupts sometimes) you could also introduce the swear jar, every time she swears hit her up for some money. Its your business and you decide what is and isn't appropriate so be strong and firm with her and if she does leave well more room for someone who doesn't drive you nuts.

 

['chelle]

Actually, I think you can and should say something to her. I agree that its not our job to point out our clients little annoyances, and in most cases you should smile sweetly and take their money, however two things spring to mind for me here:

1) There is never a reason why you should tolerate bad language. If I had a client who was effing and blinding through the appointment I would tell her to stop, whether there were kids present or not. I think it would be appropriate for you to tell her to stop swearing and I dont think it would cross a professional boundary to do so.

2) If she is flailing her arms about, how can you be expected to do your job? I would never expect money for a sub-standard set of nails, and so in return I expect the client to stay still so that I can do a good set of nails. Again, I dont think it would be out of order for you to tell her that she needs to keep her hands still so that you dont mess up her nails. Maybe if you tell her the first time and she still fidgets, you could say that she is going to make you mess up her nails, and she will have wasted her money on them, that might make her sit still!

Apart from that, with the shrieking and the high pitched voice, I agree that there;s nothing you can say about that, just one of those things you will have to put up with!!

 

[thg]

she can't be as bad as the woman i get, and i have the honour every other tuesday, and guess what she's due this week, I ask myself is life worth living.
God the day after tomorrow, whhhhhyyyyyyyyyy thg:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

 

[lucy_locket]

Actually, I think you can and should say something to her. I agree that its not our job to point out our clients little annoyances, and in most cases you should smile sweetly and take their money, however two things spring to mind for me here:

1) There is never a reason why you should tolerate bad language. If I had a client who was effing and blinding through the appointment I would tell her to stop, whether there were kids present or not. I think it would be appropriate for you to tell her to stop swearing and I dont think it would cross a professional boundary to do so.

What about ppl who have a autistic spectrum disorder or tourettes, would this still be the same?? sometimes they can't just stop.

2) If she is flailing her arms about, how can you be expected to do your job? I would never expect money for a sub-standard set of nails, and so in return I expect the client to stay still so that I can do a good set of nails. Again, I dont think it would be out of order for you to tell her that she needs to keep her hands still so that you dont mess up her nails. Maybe if you tell her the first time and she still fidgets, you could say that she is going to make you mess up her nails, and she will have wasted her money on them, that might make her sit still!

What about if they have problems with body perception?? sometime ppl do these strange things like arms everywhere, tapping, making noises ect it's just there way of knowing where there body is in the space around them. sorry it's really hard to explain.

Apart from that, with the shrieking and the high pitched voice, I agree that there;s nothing you can say about that, just one of those things you will have to put up with!!

How do I talk to her, without offending her and making it understood that she needs to calm down and quit bouncing about and shrieking and swearing for nothing?
She gets me so mad, I want to smack her sometimes. How awful is that??

Any advice would be appreciated!:hug:

The reason she might over react to what you do could be because she has oversensitive skin. to some people the slightest touch could feel like they are having there skin ripped off!

if i was you i would maybe have 5-10 minutes before treatment maybe doing some hand and arm stroking to desensitize the skin in that area and maybe play some music to help relax her. i would also tell her why you are doing it and also add a certain amount to the cost of treatment to cover the extra time being spent.

it's a shame because ppls with certain special needs can be given up on when all they just need is a little understanding and help. i'm sure you will do what's best hun :hug:

 

[Bagpuss]

I don't think this person sounds like she has any kind of special needs...its just the way she is....her personality...we all have one and they ain't all supposed to be the same.

But they are clients....we haven't got to like them...and we shouldn't be telling them about things that bug us about them.

Heck if i went to the hairdressers and the hairdresser said to me.."hey Angie, i really like you but the way you talk, hold your head and express yourself really does my head in"...I wouldn't go back !!

 

[lucy_locket]

i completely agree with you angie.

i'm not saying she has special needs not at all.
i'm just saying sometimes people do have special needs that you can't see and we as professionals need to be aware so we can let them access treatments and enjoy them thats all.

:hug:

 

[Ragdoll >^..^<]

One of the beauties of working from home for me is that i can pick and choose my clients. I am inviting them into my home, they talk to my children, and i dont expect them to swear in their presence ! which none of them do. I think you are completely within your rights in asking her to refrain from swearing whilst your children are around, not so bad if they're not but thats up to you. If she does continue i would not think twice about reffering her elsewhere.

 

[wishbabe]

Sounds to me she could have a form of terets syndrome?
The symptoms are loss of control of body and they can't help but blurt out words which are naughty some times.

Did you get the lady to fill out an evaluation sheet? If so is there any clues on that?

 

[min11]

I don't think this person sounds like she has any kind of special needs...its just the way she is....her personality...we all have one and they ain't all supposed to be the same.

But they are clients....we haven't got to like them...and we shouldn't be telling them about things that bug us about them.

Heck if i went to the hairdressers and the hairdresser said to me.."hey Angie, i really like you but the way you talk, hold your head and express yourself really does my head in"...I wouldn't go back !!

Totally agree. I have to say it makes me glad to be on the quiter side. Not a nice thought you could be being talked about in terms of tourettes or anything else just for being extroverted and very bubbly :hug:

 

[min11]

Sounds to me she could have a form of terets syndrome?
The symptoms are loss of control of body and they can't help but blurt out words which are naughty some times.

Did you get the lady to fill out an evaluation sheet? If so is there any clues on that?

I'm only quoting you as you were the last post at the time I posted so it's not aimed at you personally :hug: Are we all doctors now? It can take quite a process of different tests to diagnose any of the conditions mentioned here let alone a few posts in this topic. I'm quite amazed really to be honest.

:hug:

 

[wishbabe]

I know I feel bad now:cry: Was just trying to give this lady a good excuse for driving the tech mad. SORRY!!!

 

[lucy_locket]

I'm only quoting you as you were the last post at the time I posted so it's not aimed at you personally :hug: Are we all doctors now? It can take quite a process of different tests to diagnose any of the conditions mentioned here let alone a few posts in this topic. I'm quite amazed really to be honest.

:hug:

i don't think anyone is trying to diagnose, just give advise and maybe a reason as to why she is the way she is.

:hug:

 

[sknight]

The only thing i would have a problem with is the swearing. If it was really bad language and it was very frequent I would ask her to "watch her P's & Q's please". I am no saint either but it doesn't mean I wanna hear constant foul language, its not necessary. Of course if a client had a disorder like someone mentioned above then I would make allowances and keep the kids outta the way. x