How to deal with upset client & taking it personally

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WIllowlanehair

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Jul 22, 2020
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Hello Lovelies,

I hope everyone is keeping well and safe! Just wanting some feedback on how to cope with unrealistic expectations and upset clients. I've been qualified for 8 years now, but I get incredibly disheartened and take it really personally when a client isn't happy with their hair.

How do you guys deal with negative feedback? I think because I put so much thought into each client, I take it really personally when they're not happy and when I do genuinely make a mistake, I doubt my skills as a hairdresser. I can be incredibly hard on myself. I'll list two examples and what I did to try combat them;

1. Regular client who came in with snapped over processed hair but still wants to stay blonde. I use the low and slow method and DO NOT drag the lightener through to the ends. She's been with me for a year now, the snapping has subsided and we're getting even growth. 2 weeks before her appointment, she used a box dye. Her natural colour is about a level 7 and usually lifts REALLY clean. However, this box dye lifted her roots and made them orange, full scale, ORANGE. I explained to her how hard box dye pigment is to remove from the hair, stacked in full head of baby lights and let them process. Low and slow. I then toned her hair, cut and blowdried. She took one look at it and said, "It looks like you've not done anything". Now her roots we're orange anymore, we'd gotten them to a light gold. She normally has very light has blonde. I apologised, stayed later and applied a second toner explaining again it won't be so icy. I didn't charge her full price, it was still slightly golden. I really took this to heart, because I've put so much time and effort into getting it back into a good condition, she then box dyed it and when I tried to fix it, said it wasn't good enough.

2. Full scale mess up. I mean FULL SCALE 'eff up! Lady with level 6 root normally has scalp bleach, again lifts ULTRA clean, I went against my gut here... bare with me while I explain! Firstly, she was another stylists client accidentally booked into my column, so I spoke with the stylist and she told me step by step what to do. This clients ends are a level 10 and her root is a level 6... and there is MASSIVE regrowth. Now, this is what I would've done if it was my client;

- 20 vol on mid lengths working crown down and then the front sections. once done, 10 vol on roots. Rinse the back when achieved level and then rinsed the front when that was ready. I then would've toned with correct toner, she likes it silvery.

but this is what the stylist told me to do....

- bleach from roots to mid lengths, starting front first and then from crown down. Guys, when I say her hair had a huge warm band... I toned with what the stylist suggested, client wasn't happy as it was too warm, reapplied second toner knowing fine well it needs a second bleach but don't have the time. The toner helped but not much. I cut and thinned her incredibly thick hair.
I didn't charge her for the toner or for the cut and blow-dry, she tipped £10 and told me to get a bottle of wine. She was so wonderful but I could tell she wasn't happy at all. I'm now doubting my skills and questioning myself as a hairdresser.

My question is, how do you personally deal with situations like these. Some just brush it off, but I take it really personally. Any tips on how to deal with a disappointed customer?

Looking forward to your responses, many thanks Xo
 
Honestly? Whenever I've messed up I put on a brave face for the rest of the day and when I get home I eat dinner while watching something that makes me laugh. Not everyone will be happy and sometimes stuff happens in the industry. But tomorrows another day.

Also I take clients as they are. I mean colour history is important but if the client is seeing you it should be your method not another stylists. Some people are better at different techniques. Hairdressing is artistic and there are loads of different methods to get a result.
 
It’s art. We are human and even the best hairdresser can make a mistake every now and then. You can’t please all of the people all of the time. I took it to heart so badly in the beginning. I still do now, but I’m a lot better.
Every head is different and has a different opinion and taste. What works for one won’t always work for another.
I try to be as upfront and honest with my clients and take the time to talk them through their likes and dislikes but unfortunately, you will always get an unhappy client. It can be hard to shake it off and I do find I feel sheepish for the rest of the day but I remind myself that for every 1 client that is unhappy, I have far more very happy clients who keep coming back. Self belief is important and knowing that you put that time and effort into every client really shows through in majority of clients.
 
Client 1.
Anyone that uses a box dye doesn’t care that much about their hair. I would have left it at the gold stage and said ‘next time we’ll hopefully get it lighter but I did warn you about the difficulties when correcting a box dye job’.

As the professional, you explain the process and likely results, you reduce their expectations to a more realistic level and you charge the full amount. Why should you be underpaid because the client is a cheapskate?

Client 2.
After taking advice on the hair history, do a proper full consultation as you would with any new client and go with your own instinct.
Do you think there’s a possibility the other stylist led you astray so that the client wouldn’t be happy with the result?
I had this happen to me once when I was newly qualified and it was mortifying. I felt the ‘advice’ was dubious but trusted my more experienced colleague who turned out to be not very nice after all. She told me to add some powder bleach to a highlift tint. :oops:


Finally...

You can learn to be more confident, assertive and believe in yourself. It just takes regular practice.
Every morning when you look in the mirror, smile and tell yourself that you’re a good competent hairdresser.
Remind yourself that you deserve to be paid in full every time.

Be more firm with clients and stop apologising and discounting your services.
They’re disappointed only because they are completely unrealistic in the first place.
If they want to look like their favourite celebrity, are they willing to pay the several hundred pounds it costs to maintain that look?
If necessary, remind them that you’re holding a tint brush, and not a magic wand!

At the end of every single day, be grateful for all your happy clients and learn to accept that it’s ok for the odd client to leave unhappy.
 
I'm not a hairdresser but I'm a great believer in 'a picture paints a thousand words' - I'd be taking photos of the hair before starting. It's very easy to forget what something looked like before, especially when you're sat in a chair for a couple of hours imagining in your head how it's going to look. That's why those who do tanning provide those little stickers. You think your tan hasn't taken then peel off the sticker and realise how white you were before :p
 
It is a horrible feeling especially when it’s just because the client doesn’t like it , I agree with haircutz with client 1, clients don’t understand that box dye and salon dye are completely different I just show them how many different peroxide’s we have to decide from unlike the one tube one bottle option in a biz dye, I try to be as accommodating towards clients as possible and always encourage them to let me know if they aren’t happy with it as I’d much rather fix it (asking as it’s not just cuz they picked a colour they didn’t like) and send them out happy instead of them leaving slating my work/salon and then ruining it themselves at home. But some are just plain rude like client 1 is of told her “yes I can get it to that blonde but you will be leaving with it all in a plastic bag! Which I have had to tell one of my clients before
 
Lovelies, reading through your posts on here has lifted my spirits. Thank you all so much for taking the time to respond :) I can be incredibly hard on myself, and doubt myself and my abilities. Hearing that I'm not the only one helps put into perspective that it's okay. I hope you're all staying safe and well <3 Thank you all for your kind and reassuring words!! <3 Xoxox
 

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