Follow your heart?

[skankinchar]

Hello my lovelies, seen as you are the wisest people I know, I thought I'd ask a bit of advice.
My boyfriend has asked me to move in with him, which is great! He's in the army, and is based about 2 hours away from me, so the plan is to move up there.
I'm totally ready, and very excited... However, I am encountering some rather negative reactions from people about it! My mum and dad couldn't be happier (they were my main concern) but some of my friends think it's too soon. WE haven't been together very long, but I've known him for years and really don't think I'm making a mistake.
What are your thoughts? I'm inclined to give it a go, I'll never know unless I try, right?
:biggrin:

 

[essentia]

If you have no doubts then follow your heart. When I met my now husband and decided to up and leave my house, job, everything I knew and move to a new area to be with him, friends were concerned I was doing the right thing. However I felt it to be right even though we hadn't known each other very long. We are still together 10 years on, married with a gorgeous son, so I guess my instinct was right :biggrin:. Good luck with your move.

 

[skankinchar]

This is the same situation I'm in, so hearing something this positive is great i'd like to think that 10 years down the line i'll still be very happy! Thankyou

 

[happyfeet]

Hi honey

Awww congratulations first of all. How exciting!

The question for you really is do YOU feel ready? Never mind anyone else at the minute, what do YOU think and feel?

I put a lot of trust in my parents personally, and no they don't always get it right, i know when they advise me they are not only thinking from it from a parents point of view but as an adult and wise old pair of birds

With regards to your friends, you've asked their opinion so theyve given it, i assume theyve elaborated and not just said its too soon. By all means take on board what they say but also consider is there a touch of wishing it was them, are they upset youll be moving 2 hours away? Or do they genuinely believe its 'too early'?

Ha ive asked you more questions than answering any but ultimately you need to think this through and also discuss it with your partner as its you two that are effected by this decision.

I knew my now husband (emails, texts the odd drink) for a year before we got together. I moved in with him after six months and got pregnant a month later! Yes a big shock and all very whizz bang. When our bubba was 5 months we amicably and mutually decided to split up, however whilst we didnt live together we remained friends and about three months later we naturally and nicely fell into each other again. We moved back in together about 18 months later, bought our house, moved area and last year i married my hubby

My point is i dont ever regret moving in so quickly with him even despite the fact that we split up or did everything a little arse about face. We made all of our decisions together, yes we took on board other peoples advice, but ultimately as a couple you need to be able to discuss your situation, feelings and how to's.

Good luck honey x x x

 

[skankinchar]

Thankyou so much for your lovely reply

I come from a forces family, my mum upped and left to live with my dad and they were together for 20 years, so I trust them both and know it can work.

I think maybe there's a hint of jealousy from some people, at the end of the day I have no real ties right now, so can afford to be as spontaneous as I am. If anything, I think it'll be good for my friendships as it'll prove who my real friends are, after all, distance shouldn't matter.

I've spoke to my other half about it, and he says that he's happy with whatever decision I decide to make. He's a few years older than me, and his last relationship lasted 3 years, yet he never had any desire to live with her or anything. I think this is a major positive for me, as we all know how scared guys can get about such things!

So yeah, I'm going to go for it... I feel so excited about it, and I don't want to be thinking "what if?"

 

[pinkknailss]

your friends are 100% jealous! No doubt!

 

[*Zoe*]

Maybe your friends are just don't want to lose you?

We don't know what the future holds. It may work, and it may not. You'll never know unless you take the chance.

I'd just have a quiet word with your mates and say 'I'm doing this, it's a bit step for me, and i'd appreciate your support in this'.

Hope it's all goes well x

 

['chelle]

You know sometimes friends can appear as though they are concerned for you, but their motives can be selfish. Perhaps jealousy, perhaps they dont want their friend to move away, but at the end of the day you seem very happy and very sure about what you want to do, and if you're parents are happy too I would say go for it because theres no more critical judge of a boyfriend than a mum and dad!! I hope things work out for you and that the two of you are very happy together. I moved in with my boyfriend having known him for 8 months, and we are now married and have been together 8 years and are as happy as we could ever hope to be

 

[skankinchar]

Thankyou so much guys just waiting till Saturday, he's going to look at a place for us! Excited! Xx

 

[FlawlessBeauty]

Aww you sound really happy and excited about moving in with him. Like you said, you won't know until you try so go for it.

Your friends are probably just looking out for you and maybe are a little jealous that you are moving onto this new adventure.

A different situation, but i started dating my bf not long after a big break up with my ex. We both lived with our parents and we knew that he would be moving 4 hours away as his mum was moving. Lots of people suggested to me that i break up with him before he moved. I know they were looking out for me and didn't want to see me upset again, but i didn't want to break up with him.

We did the long distance thing for 8 months and then he moved in with me. We've now been together for 2 years and 2 months and we've never been happier.

Follow your heart xx

 

[Luscious85]

Congratulations, how exciting!
I would 100% agree - just do what you feel is right, follow your instincts and if you want to go for it then do it! As lovely as our friends are, I have to say I think often they feel jealous and try to bring down what you have a little bit because they don't want you to move on. I have found it a little bit with a couple of my oldest friends who were used to me always being the single one!
Good luck with what you decide!