How to be strong?

[Absolutebeautyx]

Hello geeks, need a bit advice although it's a sad one
Last night my boyfriends very good friend was found after he hung himself, he was still alive only just when they found him but in the early hours of this morning they turned off his life support. My poor boyfriend is devastated I have honestly never seen him upset in the 4 and a bit years I have been with him. they don't see each other much so he keeps on saying if I had phoned him yesterday or the day before would he still be okay or if I had saw him more would he maybe still be here?? I keep telling him everyone will be thinking the same but I know he can't believe me. I just want to cry for him but feel I need to be the strong one so how do you be strong when someone you love is so upset and you can't take the pain away? My heart is breaking for him, it really puts stuff into perspective and makes you realise how much people mean to you! Sorry for the long post suppose I just needed to talk to someone xx

 

[xxAmyxx]

Sorry to hear this.

I suffer from depression and can tell you he could have been considering this for a long time or it was impulsive. A phone probably wouldn't have helped.

All you can do is be there to listen to him get support him so he can get through this.

 

[Absolutebeautyx]

Sorry to hear this.

I suffer from depression and can tell you he could have been considering this for a long time or it was impulsive. A phone probably wouldn't have helped.

All you can do is be there to listen to him get support him so he can get through this.

I know that's what I keep trying to tell him but he's devastated so understandably won't listen. He's went out for a drink I just want to cuddle him and tell him it will all be okay lol! Sorry to hear about your depression it must be a horrible horrible thing to live with xx

 

[dandelionpoppy]

How very sad.
I wouldn't worry about being strong. Hug him and cry with him.
You are both in shock and there will be several stages to work through, just take it one day at a time and let him feel it's OK to express his feelings. xx

 

[Absolutebeautyx]

How very sad.
I wouldn't worry about being strong. Hug him and cry with him.
You are both in shock and there will be several stages to work through, just take it one day at a time and let him feel it's OK to express his feelings. xx

Thank you for that dandelion poppy even my 2 kittens were cuddling into him they can obviously sense their daddy is upset! I just wish he hadn't gone out to drink but I know he will feel a bit better talking to another friend who went through something similar a few years ago.. It's just so sad such a waste of a brilliant and very successful life! Xx

 

[pure]

That is so awful, hugs to you both :hug:

My ex brother in law hung himself 2 years ago and I do know that people who do this are determined. This wouldn't have been a cry for help but a definite decision he had made and there was nothing your bf or anyone else could have done to stop him. If he hadn't done it then it would certainly have been another time in the future.

All you can do now for your bf is be patient, listen when he wants to talk, don't make him talk if he doesn't want to and keep reassuring him that this isn't his fault and he couldn't have stopped it. His friend was obviously very ill.

 

[Absolutebeautyx]

That is so awful, hugs to you both :hug:

My ex brother in law hung himself 2 years ago and I do know that people who do this are determined. This wouldn't have been a cry for help but a definite decision he had made and there was nothing your bf or anyone else could have done to stop him. If he hadn't done it then it would certainly have been another time in the future.

All you can do now for your bf is be patient, listen when he wants to talk, don't make him talk if he doesn't want to and keep reassuring him that this isn't his fault and he couldn't have stopped it. His friend was obviously very ill.

This is the 3rd person close to is in the last 3 years (one being last month) that has hung themselves it's so so sad! Everyone said they didn't suspect a thing just that him and his girlfriend of 9 months(!) weren't getting along. I have a horrible heavy feeling in my heart tonight

Thank you for all the reassurance everyone I just needed someone to speak to! I really do love this place weather it's for finding out very useful information or just having a wee rant xxx

 

[Pinkbunny28]

That's awful. I can't offer any support as I'm in a similar situation today. I'm trying to be strong for one of my best friends. Her little girl passed away yesterday...They don't even know why yet. I think you just have to let them know you are there and that they can turn to you for anything and that you love them. Let them know it's ok to feel emotions...

Sent from my GT-I9300 using SalonGeek mobile app

 

[pure]

Also don't forget that whilst you want to support your bf and help him through this, you also need support. Be kind to yourself at this time too :hug:

 

[tonicj]

That's so sad. I agree with the others. Just be there for him with loads of hugs xx

 

[Absolutebeautyx]

Me and these 2 wee cuties are ready for cuddles when and oh god if he comes home tonight! Thank you for all your help lovely ladies it's just nice to talk xx

 

[Absolutebeautyx]

That's awful. I can't offer any support as I'm in a similar situation today. I'm trying to be strong for one of my best friends. Her little girl passed away yesterday...They don't even know why yet. I think you just have to let them know you are there and that they can turn to you for anything and that you love them. Let them know it's ok to feel emotions...

Sent from my GT-I9300 using SalonGeek mobile app

Oh god how horrible!! So very sorry to hear that! I hope you are okay too xxx

 

[Nats10]

So sad.. So sorry to hear that xx