Job causing problems with mum!

[Hairflair'xo]

Hey geeks, some of you already know aswell as my salon job and level three hair course I'm also working in a nightclub, absolutely loving all of it! But the club job is causing problems between me and my mum. She hates me working there and constantly has a go about it, telling me to quit, moaning that i sleep too long the next day (I'm not home til five am so a lay in is needed!) she's even threatened to hand in my notice for me! Although I don't think my manager would accept it from her....what can I do!? I'm an adult, I pay my way, earn my own money and I'm very independent (I do still live at home but cook&clean for myself) she's not budging on it!! Grrrr xxx

 

[StephR]

I think you need to sit down and talk to your mum, explain how you feel why you work there etc and then invite her to tell you why she feels the way she does. Have a proper heart to heart. It sounds to me like she is just worried about you and doesn't want you working in a place like that. The only way you will resolve it is by talking to her. Xx

 

[Hairflair'xo]

I think you need to sit down and talk to your mum, explain how you feel why you work there etc and then invite her to tell you why she feels the way she does. Have a proper heart to heart. It sounds to me like she is just worried about you and doesn't want you working in a place like that. The only way you will resolve it is by talking to her. Xx

Brilliant advice but believe me I've already tried this, there's no reasoning with the woman, she just doesn't listen :/ xxx

 

[izzidoll]

What at your mothers concerns and are they justified?
Is this a club that there is a lot of trouble,does your employer there look after his staff, and provide transport home for you at that time in the morning?
Can you honestly say working there doesn't impact on your studies?

I know working in pubs and clubs can be a good experience and lets future employers see you have worked during your training but a parent will always have concerns.

 

[Steph86]

Must admit my mum sometimes moaned when I lived at home & worked in a nightclub. I got in about 3am, & as id lie in she thought i treated the house as a hotel but I was up for college when I had to be, but weekends I slept in. Truth is I loved working in a club, it fitted in well with college as it was mainly weekends, just 1 night in the week, (& 1st wednesday of every month) & it was good money for my age (9 years ago it was £8.10 per hour, min wage was around £5) plus tips! I could have worked full time all week on an apprenticeship for alot less money.


What is it she doesn't like about your job?

Xx

 

[Hairflair'xo]

I earn way above minimum from it, I either walk home with a group of work friends that live near me or get a cab if I'm on my own, there's no shortage of bouncers, any hint of trouble and there on it, my town is generally very safe anyway, and it doesn't affect college whatsoever, I work sat and mon nights, and go to college weds, thurs and fri, she is just being unreasonable and won't let me talk about it with her xxx

 

[AmberExt]

Is it time to move out? Get a flat share with a work mate?

 

[Hairflair'xo]

Is it time to move out? Get a flat share with a work mate?

I have been considering this for a while but I don't wanna rent, it's just chucking money away that I could be saving for a mortgage...really don't see the sense in renting just to line someone else's pocket, and although I'm on a good hourly wage overall it wouldn't be financially viable xxx

 

[Steph86]

Is it just you & your mum who live at home? Just wondering if you have a sister/dad/brother who maybe able to help talk her round or stand up for you? Xx

 

[Hairflair'xo]

Is it just you & your mum who live at home? Just wondering if you have a sister/dad/brother who maybe able to help talk her round or stand up for you? Xx

I live with my mum and stepdad, he doesn't really get involved cause he doesn't see it as his place to say anything xxx

 

[Steph86]

Really is a tough one

As izzy said if there was a particular reason maybe you could reassure her.

Xx

 

[Hairflair'xo]

Really is a tough one

As izzy said if there was a particular reason maybe you could reassure her.

Xx

Almost impossible situation, thankyou everyone for your suggestions, if I had a more reasonable mother they would have worked! Haha xxx

 

[izzidoll]

Maybe reassure her that having this job will show future employers how hardworking reliable and trustworthy you are and will give you the edge over the other job applicants.

Working in this club shows that you turn up on time, work hard and can be trusted with money (I am assuming you work behind the bar).

 

[Hairflair'xo]

Maybe reassure her that having this job will show future employers how hardworking reliable and trustworthy you are and will give you the edge over the other job applicants.

Working in this club shows that you turn up on time, work hard and can be trusted with money (I am assuming you work behind the bar).

I do abit of everything, on the bar, front of house, cloakroom, promoting, I'll
Mention this to her, thanks! Xxx

 

[rachy86]

If you currently pay your own way then a houseshare could be viable? I know where your coming from. My mum is very similar. You never know if you start openly looking for places to view, she might back off with the nagging at the thought of her baby moving out xx