Kids and going out for dinner-not again!

[Missy1213]

I went out today with the kids to my favourite restaurant. I was really looking forward to it but was also scared of taking all 4 of my kids unsure how they would behave.
Their ages are 9,8,4 and 2.
It was awful. I couldn't relax or enjoy my food. The eldest two bickered over who got the milkshake with the most cream on top, the 3rd child was sulky at 1st because I picked up his knife and not my own then proceeded to spend the rest of the time under the table along with my 2 yr old who just follows suit.
Neither of then ate a sufficient amount.
I couldn't yell at them because of where I was. Tried many times to tell the younger two to sit down.
In the end it felt like all I did was tell them off constantly , I know it could be a lot worse but for me it was not enjoyable.

I see some children who are so good. Just sit there on their BOTTOMS like normal.
I even gave the eldest and 4 yr old a pep talk before going.

I thought it would be a nice change to go as a family which we rarely do but I think I'm going to leave it.
It just causes more stress.

How's it for you? Are your munchkins good?

 

[Mobile Manicure]

What ever possessed you to take 4 children under 10 out to dinner somewhere nice?!

Were you the only adult? I would only do a child friendly pub or fast food outlet with a group like that. Somewhere with an outdoor seating area where they can run around and let off steam.

My girls are 12 and 6. They've always been well behaved in restaurants, even nice ones but to be fair it's just the two of them. The 12 year old mothers the little one and takes her to the toilet etc, helps her with colouring in. It's never been a problem but there is a massive difference between taking 4 kids out and 2 girls.

 

[virtues2011]

I would have left them in there. Alone.

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[w1nnie]

I help at an infant school at lunchtimes and the kids have to sit on thier bottoms all the time, and most of them do, but if they start stretching across the table they are immediately told to sit on thier bums. It's different in a school environment, there's a rigorous system in place and there's no room for mucking about because 120 kids have to all have thier lunch within an hour.

 

[Missy1213]

Lol to virtues.

MM it was an Indian restaurant. Families go. My sisters child who is 4 is good as gold and so are my sis in laws...
I just thought it would be nice. Hubby was with me too.
I just didn't expect it to be like it was.
We rarely get a chance to do something together and this restaurants chocolate cake is to die for which I was craving ... So off we went.

 

[Missy1213]

I help at an infant school at lunchtimes and the kids have to sit on thier bottoms all the time, and most of them do, but if they start stretching across the table they are immediately told to sit on thier bums. It's different in a school environment, there's a rigorous system in place and there's no room for mucking about because 120 kids have to all have thier lunch within an hour.

I suppose come sept it'll be a different story then as my 4 Yr old starts school.
Do I dare try again?

 

[w1nnie]

School meals certainly disciplines them at the table, they are not allowed to touch each other even it's the old saying.. 'give them an inch, they will take a mile'. Just have to be firm but fair, but it's not enjoyable for you if you have to keep telling them off.. but they need to learn to sit at the table !

 

[ch-ela]

Well, you've got to try, haven't you.

Mine were always ok in restaurants. My son always did as he was told until he turned 13 and my daughter always needed to see the toilets. At least twice, which was a bit annoying.

You need to keep your favourite restaurant for just you and your husband or a good friend and take the children somewhere where it doesn't matter so much to you if they are unruly.

 

[lilly]

I went out today with the kids to my favourite restaurant. I was really looking forward to it but was also scared of taking all 4 of my kids unsure how they would behave.
Their ages are 9,8,4 and 2.
It was awful. I couldn't relax or enjoy my food. The eldest two bickered over who got the milkshake with the most cream on top, the 3rd child was sulky at 1st because I picked up his knife and not my own then proceeded to spend the rest of the time under the table along with my 2 yr old who just follows suit.
Neither of then ate a sufficient amount.
I couldn't yell at them because of where I was. Tried many times to tell the younger two to sit down.
In the end it felt like all I did was tell them off constantly , I know it could be a lot worse but for me it was not enjoyable.

I see some children who are so good. Just sit there on their BOTTOMS like normal.
I even gave the eldest and 4 yr old a pep talk before going.

I thought it would be a nice change to go as a family which we rarely do but I think I'm going to leave it.
It just causes more stress.

How's it for you? Are your munchkins good?

It's tough ! I've been lucky with mine but friends have had nightmare meals ! Let them Take something they love, even if it's a, dare I say it, an I pod etc !!! Some people, who have model children that sit and use their napkins and never ever knock over a drink will think might be a terrible terrible thing to advise but your brood are still sooo young to enjoy a family meal, we think it is a lovely thing to do, they think going for a family is the most boring thing on this earth to do, and at they're age who'd blame them !

 

[Victoriabar]

My eldest three were always perfectly behaved, even as tiny tots... My 5yro is the spawn of Satan, carries the devil gene and has ants in her pants along with unabletolistentoyouitis and Idratherwhinethantalk syndrome... She loves going out and doesn't recognise the fact that her mother wants to kick her arse sometimes due to her ways but still smiles sweetly and talks in a calm tone (getting cross, raising voice and dragging her off fuels a hysteria that she is unable to cope with... Hers not mine)

My older kids now tho if we go out as a family... The 22yro his gf and their 2kids are well controlled, sit eat and are calm.
My 25yro just says to her daughter sit with nanny, nanny will sort it, tell nanny etc and she is wild.. She is 2 and throws things, screams, and gets frustrated as she can't talk or make herself understood.. So I'm trying to keep my 5yro under control and my middle grandie too while my eldest just sits and moans about my 5yros behaviour and that she is crying/moaning/whining and that her daughter wants me and is calling me...
My 16yro rarely comes out with us, she can't deal with the noise, the eldest palming middle grandie off all the time or the moaning.
I'm sure she is embaressed.

I'm just stressed anytime we go out for food.

Mind you its exactly the same if we go to each others homes as a family thing... I always come home stressed and with a headache lol.

 

[virtues2011]

My eldest three were always perfectly behaved, even as tiny tots... My 5yro is the spawn of Satan, carries the devil gene and has ants in her pants along with unabletolistentoyouitis and Idratherwhinethantalk syndrome... She loves going out and doesn't recognise the fact that her mother wants to kick her arse sometimes due to her ways but still smiles sweetly and talks in a calm tone (getting cross, raising voice and dragging her off fuels a hysteria that she is unable to cope with... Hers not mine)

My older kids now tho if we go out as a family... The 22yro his gf and their 2kids are well controlled, sit eat and are calm.
My 25yro just says to her daughter sit with nanny, nanny will sort it, tell nanny etc and she is wild.. She is 2 and throws things, screams, and gets frustrated as she can't talk or make herself understood.. So I'm trying to keep my 5yro under control and my middle grandie too while my eldest just sits and moans about my 5yros behaviour and that she is crying/moaning/whining and that her daughter wants me and is calling me...
My 16yro rarely comes out with us, she can't deal with the noise, the eldest palming middle grandie off all the time or the moaning.
I'm sure she is embaressed.

I'm just stressed anytime we go out for food.

Mind you its exactly the same if we go to each others homes as a family thing... I always come home stressed and with a headache lol.

Ha ha ha Vixx - sorry don't mean to LOL at your post but it makes all the more sense as I know you! I can just picture it..... however you probably know that I would have a worse meltdown than the 5 year old and the 2 year old put together. They both would soon be quiet if I started!

 

[Victoriabar]

Ha ha ha Vixx - sorry don't mean to LOL at your post but it makes all the more sense as I know you! I can just picture it..... however you probably know that I would have a worse meltdown than the 5 year old and the 2 year old put together. They both would soon be quiet if I started!

Please please please come with us.... I would pay to see these two wild kids silenced

(Ladies I would also video it and share so you could all see )

 

[Baggybear]

What you've described above is a perfectly normal family meal out with 4 kids.

Don't panic, the older they get the better they are at behaving for that short time in a resteraunt (my 4 kids are 17, 11, 7 & 6).

The more you go the more used to it they will become and a stern talk reminding them of what you expect from them just before you go in usually helps a little.

If they do not know what you expect from them then it will be a stressfull time. We go out as a family about once a month and usually end up in an all you can eat Chinese as this is what the kids love (I'd prefer to go to the all you can eat Indian but we go there as a couple as the kids don't like Indian food).

Try sitting nicely at home and pretending your out (the kids love a bit of imaginative roleplay), have several trial runs & make it fun, give the best behaved person a prize (extra desert or something).

The more they behave nicely eating at home, the more they get to go out for food and the easier it becomes I promise.

 

[missBeauty-lic]

Ano it sounds awful but I hate taking my kids out all together, its a nightmare.

My eldest is 18, 14, 10 nd 2 my eldest fights with all of them, my 14 year old sulks nd stabs the table with his knife and fork, my 10 year old crys and winges from walkin in to walkin out, and my youngest swings from the rafters haha

Now I love taking them all out separately, nice and peaceful it well apart from my youngest who still swings from the rafters haha

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[MrsHBeauty]

Mine can be little gits they are 10, 8 and 4. But if hubbies with me I march them out of the restaurant and they stand outside for a telling off. To be honest as long as I'm not leaving the 4 year old I will take them out on my own.

I often take them out in my own and one day it will go perfect and next time it's an utter disaster. I have pod for the food and left halfway though eating, drive straight home and put them to bed. I will not tolerate naughty behaviour from them and thy know when they've gone too far.

I'm expecting my 4th child and bad days (like yesterday!) make me question why we're having another lol.


Jemima

 

[xnailsbylisax]

My 4 year olds the opposite! Absolute swine but if he is in a room where foods involved - good as gold ha! Little pig!

 

[Ncc83]

I have 2 boys, age 4 and ten. My 4 year old eats lovely for his age, table manners, uses his cutlery perfectly etc, my 10 year old however, eats disgustingly and always ends up in trouble!. They have both been brought up the same ........

 

[Panoramic]

A good clip round the ear should do the trick.


Surrey Girl through and through x

 

[ukfaye]

I went out today with the kids to my favourite restaurant. I was really looking forward to it but was also scared of taking all 4 of my kids unsure how they would behave.
Their ages are 9,8,4 and 2.
It was awful. I couldn't relax or enjoy my food. The eldest two bickered over who got the milkshake with the most cream on top, the 3rd child was sulky at 1st because I picked up his knife and not my own then proceeded to spend the rest of the time under the table along with my 2 yr old who just follows suit.
Neither of then ate a sufficient amount.
I couldn't yell at them because of where I was. Tried many times to tell the younger two to sit down.
In the end it felt like all I did was tell them off constantly , I know it could be a lot worse but for me it was not enjoyable.

I see some children who are so good. Just sit there on their BOTTOMS like normal.
I even gave the eldest and 4 yr old a pep talk before going.

I thought it would be a nice change to go as a family which we rarely do but I think I'm going to leave it.
It just causes more stress.

How's it for you? Are your munchkins good?

I feel for you! My son never used to sit still!
My daughter was a bit better! But by then I had learnt to only go to places where it didn't matter if they sat still or not.
Like a hungry horse or something!
If they want to go play on the slide fine!!
Save the lush places for you and hubby for now!
Center parcs is a god send for holls too.
Play areas in every restaurant.
Me glass of wine and relax!! Kids play and eat as they wish xx

 

[waffle4]

See I just don't get this. Mine used to really look forward to going out for a meal as a family (probably relieved to escape my awful cooking!) so would never have dared play up as they would know they wouldn't be going again. I think you need to be firmer with them. It's supposed to be a treat for you all, a bit of fun not an ordeal!