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So intimidating my hand wouldn't stop shaking

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Auds

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Please tell me other people have also gone through this? My clients to date have mostly been family and friends or people I have known slightly but a lady phoned for an appointment a few weeks ago and even then I didn't like her tone but decided it would be fine. Anyway, I will keep this brief but I found her to be very intimidating in much of what she said and my hand just kept shaking and at one stage I felt if I had been able to run out I would have. Luckily she picked shellac iced cap because if it had been a dark colour I would surely have made such a mess. Does anyone have any tips on controlling nerves if someone making you feel this way or what to say to the client? She was truly awful and I couldn't sleep that night for thinking about it. I'm really worried now that I will encounter other people like her and I'll go to pieces, although quite how I managed to do both her hands and feet I still don't know.
 

happyfeet

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Awww hun poor you. Some people can make you feel like this but dont let it get the better of. Take control and best bit of advice i have heard is. ... Smile, breathe, repeat. Your confidence will grow over time hun and youll be able to be more in control mentally and physically.

Chin up lovey and dont worry its all a learning curve.

Big c
 

happyfeet

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Sorry meant big x bloody iphone!
 

kattyj

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Oh bless you, I get really nervous when I have new clients, last week I had 3 woman coming together for eyebrow waxing, I was so nervous I dreamt that when they arrived I was only wearing my tunic and underwear, no trousers, when the first one got on the couch it collapsed and I forgot to turn my wax pot on!

My nerves are terrible and I have a lady who when she first came sounded terribly intimidating, she really made me feel uneasy, but I tell myself I am good at what I do and I do do a good job so I have no reason to feel intimidated by her, she comes regularly now and it turns out she is the loveliest person, its just her manner and I needed to get used to it.
 

Kate1982

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You haven't said why she made you so nervous but I will go out on a limb and assume she was demanding in some way.
I find fear/frustration starts where knowledge ends. I'm not saying you don't know what your doing by any means. I'm sure your a very capable therapist however you are obviously not convinced in your own abilities yet. (Do you think Geeg would ever be intimidated by a client these days?) But don't worry hon you will be eventually. Keep throwing yourself out there. It's the only way to build up your confidence. It is very obvious to clients if you are nervous or unsure they pick up on it straight away. But every client will give you a different reponse. Some will try their hardest to put you at ease while others just assume you don't know what you are doing. My advice to you is learn to:
FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT
 

LouiseB Orchid

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My motto for nerves is:

"Fake it till you make it!!"

What I mean by this is that you have the training, you can do the job and do it well, and let that confidence grow! We all have moments like this - I am in my forties and one client tells me what a good girl I am! Yikes!!!

:hug:
 

Dolly6410

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losing the nerves will come with time, but shaking hands, gosh i struggle with them! lol only when i'm doing nail art but i usually just put down what i have in my hand, squeeze my hand tightly into a fist and take a deep breath and them stretch my hand right out. usually works. practice at home though because otherwise your client might wonder what your doing... about to punch them, about to poo your pants.. anything could be going through their head haha x
 

blossom

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I'm just the same. I've been doing this 9 years and still get the jitters sometimes.

I used to do the nails of someone off TV (absolutely lovely), a lady from a titled family (a bit plummy but nice, but I was intimidated at first) and a lady who I grew to like but who initially had me scared to death; she used to quiz me on everything from my education to what I fed my kids and would criticise everything, I used to sweat like a pig on those appointments . . . I fed like with like in the end and after a couple of years (yep years lol) we got along much better.

I also had a girl who claimed to be a nail tech who would question everything I did, and although she didn't criticize, it totally unnerved me (as I was very new at the time) to have to answer questions and justify everything I was doing when all I wanted to do was just GET ON . . .

Some clients you just wish would keep their mouths shut lol
 

Auds

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Wow! Thanks everyone for your replies. I guess I was intimidated because she did question me from the off on how long it would take me, and I did try to joke that my hand was a bit shaky when I was showing her the colours and she just said to me you are not instilling me with confidence my dear! I had thought she would appreciate me being upfront as I know it would be obvious I was nervous. I am always a bit nervous and my hand shakes a little but usually settles down very quickly and I'm in control but she took me to a whole new level. I also know that I need more clients in order to build up my confidence and skills so I guess I let her intimidate me far too easily. I dred her coming back tho. Thanks again everyone, its nice to feel your not alone and to hear some positive feedback x.
 

Floss26

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I really feel for you Auds as I've often found myself in this situation. My way of dealing with it is to try to introduce another subject with the hope of diverting the person's attention - so ask her a question about her job, children, where she lives or whatever - so that she'll be distracted from what you're doing by telling you her story if that makes sense (these types of people invariably like the sound of their own voices lol!) and you're then left to get on with the task in hand without being quite so much in the spotlight.

HTH xx
 

Auds

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I really feel for you Auds as I've often found myself in this situation. My way of dealing with it is to try to introduce another subject with the hope of diverting the person's attention - so ask her a question about her job, children, where she lives or whatever - so that she'll be distracted from what you're doing by telling you her story if that makes sense (these types of people invariably like the sound of their own voices lol!) and you're then left to get on with the task in hand without being quite so much in the spotlight.

HTH xx
Thanks, I know your right of course and I did try to do that but she proceeded to tell me that I needed to learn to talk and work at the same time (she is in the beauty industry) and that in order to do this kind of job you needed to be a people person! Anyway, I am in a calmer place now lol! Thanks for the advice tho x
 

JERSEY JOCK

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Bach Rescue Remedy....... Works wonders, get it from the chemist.....xxx
 

Nat-Nat

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If I have the shakes I always make a joke out of it and say 'it's because I havent had my gin yet today' which usually relaxes us all lol and then the shakes stop! :wink2:
 

Auds

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Bach Rescue Remedy....... Works wonders, get it from the chemist.....xxx
No idea what that is but I might just do that. Knowing my luck she will re book, Never thought I'd be praying someone didn't come back lol!
 

tweeboo

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Aww bless! If she's that awful don't book her in again tell her you've not got your appointment book as it's at home and you will call her to book her in again. If she's REALLY AWFUL and it's your business tell her she's a f**ker and tell her to p*ss off and not to book back in, not very professional but sends clients a message you won't be messed about or taken advantage of lol :)
 

JERSEY JOCK

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No idea what that is but I might just do that. Knowing my luck she will re book, Never thought I'd be praying someone didn't come back lol!
It's a herbal remedy, used for things like nervous flyers, taking exams any stressful situation really.....just calms you down and gets rid of any panicky feelings....xxx
 

brightbeauty

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Aw hun - i know how you feel and probably every therapist out there had has a few clients like yours. Put a positive spin on it and make yourself believe you enjoy doing treatments on clients like that i love the difficult ones its more fun because once you know you can handle them everyone else is a doddle!! Instead of letting her waffle on asking questions have a speech prepared that covers most of the answers to the questions likely to be asked like explain the treatment , how long it will take, some info on the products your using and briefly how they work, throw in a few big words to sound a bit scientific and that should put her at ease that you know your stuff it will make you feel more comfortable knowing youve given her all the info then just turn the conversation round to her and find something you can relate to it could take ages but worth doing as it will make your job easier when shes in for treatments good luck hun and keep at it x
 

Malibuboo

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Hey Auds,

I feel your pain! I have felt exactly the same way whilst and after a particular client left and could not stop sighing after she had left, I felt so depressed, it really does knock you back and dent your confidence. But in the long run it is a GOOD thing that you come across knock backs like this in the beginning because 1) With this experience you become wiser 2) You can build your confidence so you know how to handle this in future
Anyway I bet you did a good job and it wouldn't surprise me if the lady does rebook because sometimes some people have a hard exterior you just have to crack that and I bet you she actually does like you and the job that you did. If she does come back I think that proves it right?

Some customers you don't get that instant bond with but that makes me more determined to crack them! So don't feel bad, see it as a learning curve and you will thank her (maybe not to her face) but mentally one day for doing it as it only makes you stronger and more determined to succeed!

Nervousness brings all sorts of lovely reactions that we cant control mine is my nervous st st st stutter er er!!
HThs and keep your chin up :biggrin: xxx
 

Auds

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Aw hun - i know how you feel and probably every therapist out there had has a few clients like yours. Put a positive spin on it and make yourself believe you enjoy doing treatments on clients like that i love the difficult ones its more fun because once you know you can handle them everyone else is a doddle!! Instead of letting her waffle on asking questions have a speech prepared that covers most of the answers to the questions likely to be asked like explain the treatment , how long it will take, some info on the products your using and briefly how they work, throw in a few big words to sound a bit scientific and that should put her at ease that you know your stuff it will make you feel more comfortable knowing youve given her all the info then just turn the conversation round to her and find something you can relate to it could take ages but worth doing as it will make your job easier when shes in for treatments good luck hun and keep at it x
|Ah Nadine, Thank you. I do believe things can only get easier but as for throwing in the big words I'm afraid she was so articulate I turned to mush and couldn't string two words together :sad: Perhaps I'll need to do some role play with a friend before she comes back :biggrin: x
 

Auds

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Malibuboo, thank you x
 

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