Any other childfree geeks?

[FreyaBeauty]

I kind of half expected an angree post like that to come up on this thread :-/ somehow i didnt see anyone write anything of the sort in the threads ABOUT kids. People are just voicing their opinions, they have a right to do that. No one intended to hurt or insult anyone, well, definitely not me.

Would you say to your froend to shut up if she was telling you about her problems/concerns/worries? Even if its to with her kitten/puppy?

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My post wasn't angry I just had a bad experience of someone who really didn't like children!!
So what your saying is that its ok for you all to post your opinion about children but mine isn't welcome?

I totally understand some people don't want children and like I said its a good thing as it means less unwanted pregnancy etc!

I never said I'd tell a friend to "SHUT UP" as you put it, but simply ask to change the subject, I've had a friend who really can't stand birthing stories and she asked if it was ok if we didn't talk about it! And I changed the subject and respected her view point about it! Shame you didn't respect mine!
Sorry if my post offended people I was just voicing my opinion like everyone else does!

Rebecca

 

[annie:)]

See i have a son and i talk about him 24-7 because he is my life and im with him 24-7 and my 'friends' didnt want to hear it,but as i got told i couldnt have babies id say im more appreciate of him maybe,however i can relate in the fact i hate it when people compare my son the their pet!!i have a dog n i love him to bits but the two dont compare and until people have kids theyl never understand!xx

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[FreyaBeauty]

I understand your view totally but that's your view which you're entitled to-I'm also entitled to my view. Not all people who don't want or like kids are evil like you're boss was to you. I agree that was totally out of order. My initial point was, at the moment, my friends don't seem to be able to have a decent conversations with me these days and it's getting annoying. I'm sure your child and theirs are the most amazing things ever but for me it's like talking about football all day....it's a yawn fest! One thing I do agree with your boss on is no kids in the salon, but I wouldn't allow dogs either. And actually, I am a good friend and I'd never be horrible enough to say to my friends that I didn't want to hear their stories because friends listen to friends. I just needed a vent and to know I wasn't alone in feeling this way.

Enjoy your baby and I'll enjoy not having one. PGx

I totally understand and believe it or not I once didn't have kids and know how you feel, it gets totally boring! I guess when your friends children are older etc mums tend not to talk about them all so much and it gets easier and better convo for the ones that don't have them...bare with it ; )
Enjoy your Childfree space!! And yes everyone is entitled and I'd never take that away I just felt like the posts where a bit harsh one that said "me and my fiancé can't STAND KIDS" sorry but as a mum I did find such comments rude as they are not just "kids" they are little people with feelings...

Rebecca x

 

[Mrs RSM]

My son will soon be 22 and is living in a college apartment, so....I am childfree. I have to admit, I like the freedom of no children, but I miss my son being little. :'(

My son will be 16 in September and I totally know what you mean about missing them being little! I keep looking back at photos and get all weepy. Your son is gorgeous, a lovely looking lad!

I love children but prefer animals and I would dearly love to have another baby but I am not able to have any more children. I loved bring pregnant and I do get fed up of women that moan about being pregnant.

I don't allow children in the salon not because I don't like them but because a beauty salon is simply not the place for them.

I am always weary or people that say they "hate" children as I am if people that don't like animals, there's something a little bit off about someone who can hate small , harmless innocents, children or animals. Our two dogs are my babies ,my husband laughs at me when I tell him that as we can't have any more babies, I need a puppy!

 

[loveday]

I'm 29 and have no children and SHOCK HORROR I'm also single. I'm going to be 30 next year and I'm sick and tired of people automatically thinking that I don't want children because of my age and giving me the sympathetic tilt of the head and saying 'Oh don't worry, I'm sure you'll find someone special soon' when they hear that I'm single. Then I get the whole 'Well you'll have to start a family as soon as you can because the clock is ticking!!'

Fact is I haven't found anyone that I've really wanted to settle down with - certainly not have children with. I'm not sure if I want children, I don't even know if I can have kids, but I hate it when people think that I can't be happy and content being single and childless.

I have a work colleague who has an 18month old child. EVERY day since the child has been born she calls her Mum up 3-4 times a day asking the same questions and talking about the same stuff - how is she? What is she doing? What is she eating? Has she had a poo yet? She then goes through what time her daughter woke up, how long it took her to get back to sleep, how many bottles she gave her etc etc. Then I have to hear the same stories and see the same boring photos of her child everyday. It is REALLY ANNOYING!!!! I think the love someone has for their child is amazing, but that doesn't mean that I am interested or feel the same way about their child and want to hear story after story about their kid!

I have really bad problems with my sleep so I get really tired at work and I did the outrageous thing of saying how tired I was at work one moring......the answer I got from the work colleague was 'Well, you don't know the meaning of tired until you have a child. You just wait and then you'll know what being tired is'. - ARGHHHHH!!! So now I can't be tired??!!!

Seeing all of my friends getting married and starting a family does make me feel pressurised (which makes me angry) but it does make me upset when people think it's wierd that I don't have or particularly want children. They seem to think that my life is pretty pointless if I don't have children.

Times have changed and life isn't all about breeding!

 

[persianista]

Hmm. Everyone has stuff going on in their lives that can exhaust and stress them. I have found friends were very agressive to another childfree friend because she was looking after her elderly, ill Mother and was tired and struggling. Their view was that NOTHING is harder than bringing up a child, nobody else can be more stressed or exhausted. I found that rather distasteful.

As for treating our pets like babies, well I don't have children, so I will never know how it feels to love something more than my persians and pup. This is EXACTLY the problem we were getting at. Why poo poo what we love? why not accept that we are different from you and love different things? I promise you, we know how to love just as much as someone who has bred, thankyou very much.

Unfortunate attitude from the boss of the person above. Not everyone is like that, however I have found pregnant people rather difficult to deal with at times due to hormone/mood fluctuations. I have never made the comments or attitude you describe, however I have had a pregnant employee moan cos she was tired, then complain that I was sidelining her when I offered to cover her clients so she could go home! Those kind of things drive a boss mental.

 

[dandelionpoppy]

Think there are a lot of valid comments made.
From my own experience (long time ago now!) I hated the way people - well my mother mostly - constantly asked me as soon as I got married when I was going to have a baby. It didn't stop, though! After number one I got nagged by her about the second one. (I had the temerity to have a 3 and a half year gap) I think I did at one point say something about it being insensitive. I can't imagine how horrible it must be to be asked this if you're having trouble conceiving.
As to conversation, I think any one-track is boring, be it babies, cars, pets or even work!
I do think it is entirely possible to love both animals AND children!

 

[FreyaBeauty]

I think it's very old fashion when people question your age and why you don't have children, times have changed and for some people it's not all about babies! I don't think people should ever comment or question why at the age of 30 you don't have children, as it's just not on some peoples agenda and that Is totally up to each individual! Stand by who you are don't feel pressure from people for not getting married or having children!! It's your life ; )

As a boss I am sure it's hard having pregnant staff, I remember thinking to myself some days at work "god I am a moody cow today" and I'd try and snap out of it because I was there to do my job! I worked in a very posh area where alot of clients either didn't have children or had them and would question why I had a child without being married!! No matter what, everyone has an opinion and something to say I guess in this day and age you just have to be more opened minded about peoples situations! Some don't want children and some don't want to get married and some don't like pets....doesn't mean you should judge and it doesn't mean you love any less!

I love my little dog loads! At one point in my life she kept me going and was my reason to get up! But I love my daughter in a totally different way and in a lot of ways she keeps me going!
If you don't want children and have a little dog cat lion whatever then love it with all your love and enjoy it!

Yes, being a mum you tend to have the same convo day in day out and it gets boring to listen to! I feel for people who get bored of this! I try not to do this I talk about my daughter if I am asked! I don't actually enjoy listening to endless stories of other peoples children etc! So I don't go on about mine!

Enjoy what each of you have and what you want in life, you have a right! Everyone has a different story and situation and we should all respect that....x

 

[jurate]

I totally understand some people don't want children and like I said its a good thing as it means less unwanted pregnancy etc!

I never said I'd tell a friend to "SHUT UP" as you put it, but simply ask to change the subject, I've had a friend who really can't stand birthing stories and she asked if it was ok if we didn't talk about it! And I changed the subject and respected her view point about it! Shame you didn't respect mine!
Sorry if my post offended people I was just voicing my opinion like everyone else does!

Rebecca

My wording may have been incorrect or too harsh, maybe, - english is not my native language. Im sure you got the drift of what i meant to say And i respect your opinion. I dont have to agree with it, but i do respect it. ;-)

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[FreyaBeauty]

My wording may have been incorrect or too harsh, maybe, - english is not my native language. Im sure you got the drift of what i meant to say And i respect your opinion. I dont have to agree with it, but i do respect it. ;-)

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Thank you! Also respect your view and opinion.
: )

 

[Roxie]

I love kids especially when i can hand them back lol

I love my rabbits more to me they are my babies.

Sometimes i get broody, then i remember i like my sleep and freedom to much.

I would never say never though.

 

[annie:)]

As for treating our pets like babies, well I don't have children, so I will never know how it feels to love something more than my persians and pup. This is EXACTLY the problem we were getting at. Why poo poo what we love? why not accept that we are different from you and love different things? I promise you, we know how to love just as much as someone who has bred, thankyou very much.
.

Trust me i wasnt meaning that to poo poo what you love or sound disrespectful but im just saying until you give birth to a baby you cant imagin how you can love something so much because you made them and their your flesh and blood,nothing compares! Il give you an example of what i ment though,my cousin died a few years back at 11 month old,suddenly of meningites,now alot of my clients tried to sympathise by saying 'oh im sorry i remember when my dog died ect' and quite frankly it was an insult! I didnt however mean any offence to anyone x

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[Pretty Geeky]

Trust me i wasnt meaning that to poo poo what you love or sound disrespectful but im just saying until you give birth to a baby you cant imagin how you can love something so much because you made them and their your flesh and blood,nothing compares! Il give you an example of what i ment though,my cousin died a few years back at 11 month old,suddenly of meningites,now alot of my clients tried to sympathise by saying 'oh im sorry i remember when my dog died ect' and quite frankly it was an insult! I didnt however mean any offence to anyone x

Sent from my X10i

Sorry to hear about your cousin-that's an awful thing to have happen. I have to be honest and say that, in less extreme circumstances, I have been guilty of comparing my dog to a child. BUT its only to convey how I'd feel if such and such happened to my dog...I have no other way to compare not having had a baby. Sometimes the love that people have for their animals is as strong a love that they'll ever feel. The huge majority of people realise that there's no comparison between a child dying and a dog dying but sometimes that dog dying is ALL we have to compare feelings. I don't think your client meant to insult you or your situation in any way. I hope that makes sense. PGx

 

[Pinkbunny28]

I'd just like to say that I don't have children yet but would like to in the next 5 years have had a couple. I have had pets growing up and I recently lost my cat, I cried for days on end because he meant the world to me and was there all my teenage years so as you can imagine I shared a lot with him lol. My best friend doesn't ever want children, she doesn't like them but instead of saying to her oh I'm thinking about it and getting married and starting a family I simply speak to my other best friend who has a son and likes to talk about that kinda stuff.

I think people have just got to realize that there are certain people they can talk to about certain subjects. This is what makes us all unique and why in a group of friends you would go to each one about something different. x

 

[molly'smanicure]

I dont have kids and dont intend to , i like them but i also like them to go home after a while. xx

 

[Dream Nails]

I don't have children. Never wanted them and everyone that knows me knows that. However I do have a little parrot (that's him in my picture) and I love him so much it makes my heart ache. Hubby works away so he is my company. He even asks for a kiss by saying big kiss !!!
Vicki xx

 

[gillian w]

One of the best things about children is that they eventually grow up to hopefully be wonderful adults that you actually have lots in common with.Having just sat around the dinner table with my 17 year old son, my 20 year old daughter and her boyfriend and laughed and laughed im so glad i wanted children.

 

[happyfeet]

I'm a mummy to my beautiful six year old boy and a fur mummy to my silly bubbly yellow lab and couldn't give a monkeys tabby cat! Love my animals and part of the family but my boy is my world. I'm not having anymore as getting myself back to work and want to have enough money to provide for my little one. . . Another one would bankrupt us lol! My boy makes me laugh my socks off and smile every day.

Maybe i go on about my boy but honestly i don't care i love him same as when i first met my Hubby all i did was talk about him. You know I'm driving everyone nuts with talking about nails at the moment! I think its actually about respecting other peoples choices. I'll be honest i don't care if you have kids or you don't. What i care about is if a friend of mine had no interest in mine not cause i think people should automatically love your kids but because I'd like to think that my friends realised what was important to me.

Also i think sometimes as friends you drift away, suddenly your lives and what you want out of them change and that sometimes means you no longer keep that friendship up. That can happen over kids jobs or anything to be honest but its about realising maybe that friendship you had isn't what it used to be to me that's life nothing wrong with it and time moves on.

Me and Hubby had little man very very early in our relationship wouldn't change it for the world but I'm looking forward to doing real couple things we postponed doing when little man was around and honestly I'm really looking forward to it.

I have friends with and without kids with both friends we talk about my son our lives their kids if they have any, i get the goss from my single mates about a new bloke they've met or simply put the world to rights. What I'm trying to say and think I've totally missed the point of the thread here lol is I'm not pinned into one area, i can be a mummy, a wife and a good friend to those with or without kids. We all have friends for different reasons and also different types of friends and that's what i love. All i ask of a friend is that they respect what i love and vice versa. If they don't they don't last long as my friend.

I say you do what you want have kids don't have kids life is for you and what you make of it. There's room for everyone and that's what makes life interesting.

Ps one final thought i can categorically say looking after a new born is much easier than Labrador puppy lmao! X o x

 

[WaxGirl]

This is soooo me!!

The friends stories bore me to tears

In the salon obviously im paid to listen so no probs chat away but I cant stand people bringing their kids in when they have no manners.

And the awful kids in the salon who wont sit down, what is wrong with their parents? who put their feet on cushions and hands on walls spill their food on the floor and creat a H&S risk.... teach them some manners!!!!

I had one yesterday who was pulling at stuff interrupting me in conversation and wouldnt sit down eventually she ran into me from behind a curtain and made a big crying scene im sorry awful as its sounds but i found it hard to have sympathy o god thats bad but true i just thought sit down and shut up!

 

[BeautyDiaries]

I never want kids and I knew this from the age of about 15. It's funny because people would say to me 'oh but youre still young' and I'd think 'so what!?'. I still get that now and find it patronising to say the least that after almost 12 years of knowing that I never want kids people STILL think I'll change my mind!

I much prefer animals especially cats and my baby jessiecat is exactly that, my baby (even tho she's an old lady now bless her). I'm not interested in kids, find the idea of pregnancy utterly horrifying and grotesque and find people who go on and on and on (and ariston) about them a total bore

Just my opinion. I could go on but I know sound like a complete spinster lol

xoxo