Cheeky client. Was I fair?

[eternalscot]

An interesting book on this subject is called Mad, Bad and Sad - it charts mental health in women from its fist acknowledgement to present day. It's really interesting how the geniuses of their time, now had such a tiny impression of what was really going on. Possibly, or should I say probably, in a few hundred years, people will be saying the same about our treatments and medications! Anyway, I digress.

You don't know what it is like until you have been there yourself, I have met many a person to tell me to "snap out of it", people say "oh just smile, will you?" but it is all relative to the person. Some people can cope with things better than others, like some people bones are stronger, immune systems can fight off more.......we are all unique individuals!

I don't deny there is mental illness ofcourse there is, but it has become very fashionable to have a tad depression yet theses people seem to carry on with the love lives/personals lives fine, you know their "me" times and such likes. Yes depression exsist, but I have known people with proper depression and others who are just quite frankly narcisist, lazy attention seekers, ok so its a bit harsh saying that, Im sure there is a few on here that get the idea. Drs sign people off as there is no way of really proving it. We all feel down from time to time why this breakdown, depression label encourages all this behaviour.

 

[tigi]

I think you did as you felt fit to do. everyone is different, everone reacts differently to things, but I think if you felt you needed to take time off thenthat is what is right for you.

we all react differently to things, some find comfort keeping busy and others find comfort in being with people at times of great crisis.

I hope your dad gets better soon. take care of you xxx

 

[Pika]

As said above, I don't take time off work for headaches or colds, but if I am feeling poorly and it's a bug that I've caught...out of respect for my clients I always ring and tell them so they can make up their own mind how important their appointment is that day. However, when I was 18, my dad died after having a heart attack, it was a Wednesday so I didn't go to work, Thursday was my usual day off but I went back into work on the Friday morning. I carried on for about a month with the attitude 'life goes on' and I didn't want to let people down. But I then ended up having a complete emotional breakdown and got signed off work for 2 weeks.
It's down to the individual and individual circumstances, to the OP, if your circumstances meant that you had to have the time off, then so be it. You didn't just not show up to these clients and I'm assuming all of them were ok apart from the one mentioned? So what? We are still human, therefore we have unforeseen things happen and we actually have feelings like everyone else. Clients like that are not worth your time or emotion, bet it would have been a different story if it were her dad eh?

 

[gr8nailz]

As a people, we are selfish. Although your clients may empathize with you in regards to your father's plight, they're more concerned with their own needs. It's really human nature.

Your average loyal client would either wait until you were able to return or would see someone else on whom they felt they could rely.

Some folks are just plain self-centered.

 

[eternalscot]

I hate when my clients come into me if they are ill! I had someone off work with sickness bug but still came to me for a facial and guess what next day I was so ill! I was so angry! I wouldn't do treatments to any sick people now and I wouldn't work when I was ill. Anyway if you feel you needed the time off quite right. I had week off when my uncle died because it just didn't feel right working and people coming to my house. Oh and I changed my clients appts today as I'm still hungover from sat! Shoot me! Lol! Big hug and hope your dad gets well soon. X

You cancelled clients cos your were hungover? I would never dream of doing that and expect my clients to take me seriously, could you imagine a teacher, lawyer or professional doing that or taking a week off for a deceased Uncle? (obviously if you were brought up by your uncle and you were very close AND making all the funeral arrangements yourself, fair enough, if not Im suprised. Its your business what you do, your self employed after all. Employers give the week off for next of kin (not uncles, auties grandparents etc) as they have the funeral to organise (fair enough).

 

[Tomme]

You cancelled clients cos your were hungover? I would never dream of doing that and expect my clients to take me seriously, could you imagine a teacher, lawyer or professional doing that or taking a week off for a deceased Uncle? (obviously if you were brought up by your uncle and you were very close AND making all the funeral arrangements yourself, fair enough, if not Im suprised. Its your business what you do, your self employed after all. Employers give the week off for next of kin (not uncles, auties grandparents etc) as they have the funeral to organise (fair enough).

Iv always believed that the people who made the laws and statements about one week for x family member and 1 day for x etc were all in boarding school, I had 12 aunts ad uncles, and although we are a big family and are a well established family in the area, we are all very close, my grandmother and 19 grandchildren and on her death 30 great grandchildren, that's now up to 38. And she was as close to each and every one as I am and as their parents and grandparents respectively. I don't think a day would be long enough for anyone in my family to get over the shock and upset.

Saying that my oh's family are the complete opposite, they are a smaller family, hardly ever sees any of them, and when a uncle of his died he stayed in work and worked the day of his funeral.

Some are closer and some more distant, in my mind I expect smaller families to be closer, but then I look at me and my family, and think I have 34 keys on a keyring I call family, each key has to have a tag so I know who's house it's for, ad I can go visit anyone in my family at anytime, if they aren't home yet Incan let myself in and wait.
When my front door lock was changed I had to get 40 keys cut to be able to give out keys to te family, and that's how close we arethan my partner has a key to his grandmothers house and his own, he dosent even have a key to his brothers house's.
So maybe think how family's differ in closeness and fondness/love xoxo

 

[Beautygirl1977]

You cancelled clients cos your were hungover? I would never dream of doing that and expect my clients to take me seriously, could you imagine a teacher, lawyer or professional doing that or taking a week off for a deceased Uncle? (obviously if you were brought up by your uncle and you were very close AND making all the funeral arrangements yourself, fair enough, if not Im suprised. Its your business what you do, your self employed after all. Employers give the week off for next of kin (not uncles, auties grandparents etc) as they have the funeral to organise (fair enough).

Oh we are so different! I work to live. Yes I was off for a whole week because my uncle died and no I didn't arrange his funeral but I was there everyday for my auntie and cousins. We're a very close family. My beauty room is at my parents house and it wasn't appropriate to have people coming round.
Yes I cancelled 2 people today because I was still feeling hungover and I'm going to do them later in the week instead. They didn't mind because they like a night out too! Lol! I go out my way for them too.
My business is going really well thanks! X

 

[Cat.]

I think you were completely right i would drop everything for my family, bf and best friend and more to the point i think so would my clients just as i would expect them to cancel on me in the same situation, you cant control some situations, i also think if my mind was somewhere else i wouldnt be doing my job properly.. But as has been said we all have our own opinions!!

Im try to be pretty tough where it comes to illness but im sorry there are times when its completely unfair to be treating clients.. As has been mentioned above i had a client come in who had a sickness bug (told me half way through doing her nails) sure enough i came down with it the next day, as i was quite poorly as i already have stomach problems i was given medicine which i then had an allergic reaction too as the dosage was faaarr to high and i could barely string a sentance together or stop throwing up, so yes there are times you do actually have to stop!! But i too would work through minor things toothache, colds etc. but were all different i suppose

 

[eternalscot]

Iv always believed that the people who made the laws and statements about one week for x family member and 1 day for x etc were all in boarding school, I had 12 aunts ad uncles, and although we are a big family and are a well established family in the area, we are all very close, my grandmother and 19 grandchildren and on her death 30 great grandchildren, that's now up to 38. And she was as close to each and every one as I am and as their parents and grandparents respectively. I don't think a day would be long enough for anyone in my family to get over the shock and upset.

Saying that my oh's family are the complete opposite, they are a smaller family, hardly ever sees any of them, and when a uncle of his died he stayed in work and worked the day of his funeral.

Some are closer and some more distant, in my mind I expect smaller families to be closer, but then I look at me and my family, and think I have 34 keys on a keyring I call family, each key has to have a tag so I know who's house it's for, ad I can go visit anyone in my family at anytime, if they aren't home yet Incan let myself in and wait.
When my front door lock was changed I had to get 40 keys cut to be able to give out keys to te family, and that's how close we arethan my partner has a key to his grandmothers house and his own, he dosent even have a key to his brothers house's.
So maybe think how family's differ in closeness and fondness/love xoxo

This is very cute about the keys, but the law gives you a week off to help prepare to to tie up the estate and organise the funeral it is not about your depth of feeling. Incidentally I see my mother most days and phone her once normally twice a day. I also see my brother regularly as I did my deceased, father and grandparents. To suggest my relationship with any deceased party was any less than yours is unfair, it is not that I don't grieve or I'm feeling fine six days after being in high dependency after giving birth, it is a case of is it possible I can work? Well I will, I will make my clients happy. I would rather afford a good lifestyle, and a decent education for my son, that takes sacrifice. If people here can achieve all these things without sacrifice, well done them they know something I don't! But let's not pussy foot around here there is CHOICE involved!, people are choosing to be off for whatever reason and you really cannot blame clients if they go elsewhere.

 

[Tomme]

This is very cute about the keys, but the law gives you a week off to help prepare to to tie up the estate and organise the funeral it is not about your depth of feeling. Incidentally I see my mother most days and phone her once normally twice a day. I also see my brother regularly as I did my deceased, father and grandparents. To suggest my relationship with any deceased party was any less than yours is unfair, it is not that I don't grieve or I'm feeling fine six days after being in high dependency after giving birth, it is a case of is it possible I can work? Well I will, I will make my clients happy. I would rather afford a good lifestyle, and a decent education for my son, that takes sacrifice. If people here can achieve all these things without sacrifice, well done them they know something I don't! But let's not pussy foot around here there is CHOICE involved!, people are choosing to be off for whatever reason and you really cannot blame clients if they go elsewhere.

The law may say that, but your health is different and above the law. I wasn't insinuating you care less.
I may not have the lifestyle everyone wants, or immagines having, but I'm healthy, I give myself more than enough time to recover from illness, I take the time to look after family, and having such a hands on relationship with the health of my family and I prefer to be in this situation than make penny's to put in my pocket to buy glittering new things xoxo

 

[Beautygirl1977]

Yes we all have a choice and I chose to spend the week with my family. To be honest most people expected it and would have been quite surprised if I was Woking.
As for my hangover today this was out of order but i don't make a habit of it and my clients know i work hard. I didn't lie to them as I knew they wouldn't mind.
I don't have kids yet but I hope to soon and I don't think I'll be back to work after 6 days. Will be more like 6 months! Not sure how I'll feel but don't think I would be leaving my long awaited baby quite that soon.
Everyone is different though. For me family comes first before everything else.

 

[MeToYouNails]

Firstly, I hope your Dad is alright.

Secondly, it's not about who right and wrong and how many days or not people did or din't take off work for whatever reason.

I have had to cancel twice in 2 years and the first one was a nightmare.
I was in so much pain I couldn't speak and sent an email 4 days before her appointment (after being at A&E) and she completely ripped into me even after my explanation as to why I was cancelling. I had also given alternative people she could call.

I have had clients cancel on me because of them being ill or their children being ill and thankfully they have been thoughtful enough not to ask me to come into their environment in case I either catch something or pass it on to another client.

It is all about respect for others.

 

[TheBeautyHouse]

Wow enteralscot u are a hard worker and it's great you want to provide a great future for your family.
Sueelaine sorry to hear about your dad and I hope he gets better soon.
I do agree that sometimes people's work ethic isn't great however I know mental illnesses are very serious and sadly drive my father to commit suicide so I don't think it should be taken lightly at all. On the same topic though I did go to work the next day because that was the only stable thing left in my life at that point.
I do feel that it is important to take time off when and if you feel it is needed.
Everybody is different and yes money does make the world go round, but family and friends are just as (I'f not more) important in my eyes.
Xxx

 

[eternalscot]

Wow enteralscot u are a hard worker and it's great you want to provide a great future for your family.
Sueelaine sorry to hear about your dad and I hope he gets better soon.
I do agree that sometimes people's work ethic isn't great however I know mental illnesses are very serious and sadly drive my father to commit suicide so I don't think it should be taken lightly at all. On the same topic though I did go to work the next day because that was the only stable thing left in my life at that point.
I do feel that it is important to take time off when and if you feel it is needed.
Everybody is different and yes money does make the world go round, but family and friends are just as (I'f not more) important in my eyes.
Xxx

This is a very good point, that work does give you some stability when your world can be falling apart around you. Sorry about your father.

 

[pippy]

Right I'm going to be the baddie here, why do you need to cancel clients cos your dad has had a stroke? I have been doing this job 16 years and don't feel the need for all this last minute cancelations and clients are never happy to be cancelled on or let down. I no time of when my Dad died suddenly, 6 days off after giving birth and c section, no time in pregnancy, never off Ill but i would need to be properly ill not this headache stuff came in with flu, tonsilitis, after various operations, wrote off my car then straight back to work, how was broken into and everything including my car stolen never missed a client, the show goes on.... Other people's lives move on we can not believe we are that important in the scheme of things, I know it sounds harsh its called the work ethic which no one seems to have nowadays! Sorry about your Dad, but surely your Dad wouldn't like your business to suffer because of his illness. I'm going to get it now from all the other geeks! Next post will say poor you take a month of sick and wallow in it, we all have an opinion, I'm not saying others are wrong but it does not one favours wallowing in grief, illness or the likes.

All i can say is I feel sorry for you. u sound like a woman made of harder stuff than the rest of us, or your father might have not meant as much to you or you weren't tat close (no offense intended but just wanted to give you the same point of view as you gave). but I still noticed you took 6days off after your c-section so you are human after all as it takes about 5days for skin to heal with good care.
end of the day one geek had it right there is a line your's might just be longer than everyone else but family always comes first and anyone thinking they can replace that is seriously delirious.

I hope your dad continues to do better hun. and take the time you need off if someone doesn't lik eit they can go look for someone else who can disregard anything just to give them the perfect nails.xx

 

[eternalscot]

All i can say is I feel sorry for you. u sound like a woman made of harder stuff than the rest of us, or your father might have not meant as much to you or you weren't tat close (no offense intended but just wanted to give you the same point of view as you gave). but I still noticed you took 6days off after your c-section so you are human after all as it takes about 5days for skin to heal with good care.
end of the day one geek had it right there is a line your's might just be longer than everyone else but family always comes first and anyone thinking they can replace that is seriously delirious.

I hope your dad continues to do better hun. and take the time you need off if someone doesn't lik eit they can go look for someone else who can disregard anything just to give them the perfect nails.xx

That is frankly rude and upsetting I was very close to my father (which was often commented on), but many professionals do not take lots of time off, frankly its pointless. Was I suppose to be weeping and wailing in grief? I was only 20 years old and you only get one Dad, and you would not come out with such disreseptful cr@p if you had lost a parent yourself, however there is nothing to be gained from taking a huge time of work, the law gives you a week and that is that, grow up!

As for the comment about the C section, this is quite funny, 5 days to heal eh? from a graze perhaps! not having my insides opened up, believe me you have stiches dafty! I was also in high dependency this is like intensive care on a drip, and given a general anaesethic as there epidural did not work, yes sliced right threw without pain relief, as I had an incompetent anaesthetist. Unfortunately I was not allowed home at 5 days, although I felt fine. Look forward to hearing about you having a c section, no doubt a bit of bio oil will do the trick love?

My guess is you are quite simply cognitely challeged (not nice when people make assumptions is it?) Well don't make assumptions about me, I have not judged anyone elses relationship with their parents,child etc. Im just stating it is possible to go back to work and it is probably best all round in most cases, the show does go on!

 

[naturalnails]

I think it is time to close this now as everyone has had their say