Adhd

[Elaine143a]

I have no experience of this to be honest, but a good friend of mine has, so I can only comment on her experience.

It has taken several years for her son to be diagnosed, but (funnily enough) today she has received her son's Statement. This hasn't been mentioned on here yet, but if your daughter does have ADHD, you need to fight for her Statement to ensure she gets the additional help (and funding) that she will need to ensure her education does not suffer. My friend's son was labelled naughty, excluded on numerous times from school, and had an awful time at the hands of an unsympathetic teacher. He is now going into year 6 in Sept, and we are all hoping the Statement may improve his quality of schooling - and life.

ps - I think the majority of primary teachers do a remarkable job (not one I could do!), so please dont anyone think I'm knocking teachers with the above post.

Fight, fight, fight, and fight some more for a diagnosis if one is needed.

 

[dandelionpoppy]

I have no experience of this to be honest, but a good friend of mine has, so I can only comment on her experience.

It has taken several years for her son to be diagnosed, but (funnily enough) today she has received her son's Statement. This hasn't been mentioned on here yet, but if your daughter does have ADHD, you need to fight for her Statement to ensure she gets the additional help (and funding) that she will need to ensure her education does not suffer. My friend's son was labelled naughty, excluded on numerous times from school, and had an awful time at the hands of an unsympathetic teacher. He is now going into year 6 in Sept, and we are all hoping the Statement may improve his quality of schooling - and life.

ps - I think the majority of primary teachers do a remarkable job (not one I could do!), so please dont anyone think I'm knocking teachers with the above post.

Fight, fight, fight, and fight some more for a diagnosis if one is needed.

Absolutely agree with this. As with many things in life, those who shout loudest get the best deals.
Unfortunately, with the ever-tightening band on public funding, even having a statement may not mean all that much. There just isn't enough money to go round, and I anticipate there will be further cuts.
Keep working WITH the school, and as Elaine says push, assertively but not aggressively, (not suggesting you would but we all get emotional with our kids x), for any extra help you can get.

 

[eskimonailtech]

I wasn't going to share my personal experiences in this thread, because it's still a painful thing for me, but I went undiagnosed for the first 20 years of my life.

God knows how I even graduated high school. But I did and now I have 3 college diplomas and am a salon owner. I finished two of those diplomas before I even was diagnosed.

Any parent who says they "don't want their child on that medication" is being extremely selfish.

It's not about YOU. It's about your child, and helping them make it through each day. It's your responsibility to set your child up for life. Not putting your child in counselling, therapy and getting them medication is going to put them on an extremely bad path and you do not deserve to be their guardian if this is what you choose. You are essentially dealing them a devils card in life and both of you will pay for it dearly.

ADHD is not a "personality". It is a disorder and needs to be treated like any other problem; asthma, allergies, etc.

 

[deanosnana]

I wasn't going to share my personal experiences in this thread, because it's still a painful thing for me, but I went undiagnosed for the first 20 years of my life.

God knows how I even graduated high school. But I did and now I have 3 college diplomas and am a salon owner. I finished two of those diplomas before I even was diagnosed.

Any parent who says they "don't want their child on that medication" is being extremely selfish.

It's not about YOU. It's about your child, and helping them make it through each day. It's your responsibility to set your child up for life. Not putting your child in counselling, therapy and getting them medication is going to put them on an extremely bad path and you do not deserve to be their guardian if this is what you choose. You are essentially dealing them a devils card in life and both of you will pay for it dearly.

ADHD is not a "personality". It is a disorder and needs to be treated like any other problem; asthma, allergies, etc.

eskimonailtech, you have hit the nail on the head. Thank you so much for your post! My heart goes out to you. :hug:

 

[kirsty]

Massive thanks to all of you :hug:

eskimonailtech, please don't think I'm selfish!

My reason for being unsure about the drugs side of it was the posibility of side effects, and the fact that I don't want to lose my happy, bubbly outgoing little girl. She's my little ray of sunshine and the thought of her being calm and quiet scares the hell out of me, it would feel like she'd lost her personality.

But from what others have said here, I feel differently now, no one has said that a child on these drugs is 'doped up' or mentioned any nasty side effects so it's certainly something I would consider if that's how things go.

 

[Paul Bryson]

Just wondered if any geeks have children with ADHD? Or know any? I suspect my youngest may have it.

Kirsty x

When I was a kid, it was simply called "Hyperactivity". They put me on Ritalin at age 5, I took myself off it without permission at age 15.

All 3 of my sons show signs of it, the oldest most especially. (Not coincidentally, he's the most scientifically minded one.)

We are homeschooling. No drugs. School systems don't know how to handle bored, smart... oops, "ADHD".... kids and will threaten you with child abuse charges if you don't put them on the drugs. Fortunately, homeschooling isn't too difficult legally in California... actually it's a lot easier than EXITING public school, because once the taxpayer funded schools have you on their roster they are LOATHE to give up a funding source... oops, a child...they lose thousands of dollars for every child that leaves, or stays out of, the system.

In the town west of me, they closed two schools due to dropping enrollments -- based on my knowledge of what's going on there, I believe this is largely due to the huge number of families turning to homeschooling. There are several reasons but the overdiagnosis of ADHD, and the forced drugging that follows, are certainly contributors to the homeschool explosion. ADHD drugs, even by prescription, can harm a kid's career chances permanently. When I looked into military service (shortly after 9-11), I found that besides being a little over the age limit (which could be waivered), my childhood prescription for Ritalin totally precluded military service.... even decades later, even though I never abused it or used it illicitly. After all, Ritalin is a close chemical relative of Methamphetamine.

As to diet for the kids (and ourselves) -- we follow the Weston A Price philosophy to a large extent -- we emphasize raw milk, grass fed butter, plenty of meat, vegetables, fruit, eggs from our own chickens, whole grains. We limit sugar (a zero sugar diet for kids just isn't socially realistic) and allow NO processed vegetable oils (canola/soy/etc), hydrogenated or not. Also Vitamin D3 supplementation, 10x the RDA.

Exercise helps "ADHD" a lot. Running (for me), karate classes (for the kids), and playing outside with the dog (all of us).

And NO DRUGS.

 

[Paul Bryson]

Any parent who says they "don't want their child on that medication" is being extremely selfish.

Unless that parent has been on the medication himself and has personally experienced the downside.

ADHD is not a "personality". It is a disorder and needs to be treated like any other problem; asthma, allergies, etc.

The ADHD situation has been described as "hunters in a farmers' world syndrome. It may not be a disorder at all, it may be a natural variation of mankind. It does seem to respond to a more primitive diet, more omega-3s, and a larger amount of exercise. And a lot of ADHD guys LOVE hunting...indeed that's almost diagnostic.

Hunter vs. farmer theory - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

By the way, asthma and allergies also appear to be "disease of civilization" that respond positively to more "primitive" diets -- and higher dirt/germ exposure. So, yes, let your kids play in the mud!

 

[eskimonailtech]

Massive thanks to all of you :hug:

eskimonailtech, please don't think I'm selfish!

My reason for being unsure about the drugs side of it was the posibility of side effects, and the fact that I don't want to lose my happy, bubbly outgoing little girl. She's my little ray of sunshine and the thought of her being calm and quiet scares the hell out of me, it would feel like she'd lost her personality.

But from what others have said here, I feel differently now, no one has said that a child on these drugs is 'doped up' or mentioned any nasty side effects so it's certainly something I would consider if that's how things go.

I think Paul up there is being selfish - I think you're just being a cautious mother. But that is my opinion of him which I am entitled to, and just the same, he is entitled to raise his children as he sees fit. And even more so, I totally and completely support his right to raise his children however he wants. I just happen to think he's doing his children a great disservice.

Someone who defends their reason for not putting their children on medication with excuses that are all about THEIR experiences, is being selfish. Which was my point from the beginning. It's NOT ABOUT THEM. It's about your CHILD'S future.

Again, I'm not really into the idea of plastering my life on a public forum, so if anyone has any specific questions, again, please message me.

 

[pretty-in-pink]

my brother has adhd and to be honest the medication helps calm him hes been off it for a while now as hes classed as a adult and chooses not to take it but hes gradually got worse again hes horrible to live with at times and can be such a horrible person the mood swings are terrible,go to another doctor and get a second opinion they did some tests on my brother....its so stressful for all of us be easier if he took the medication to control it but hey ho i love him either way

 

[Pedifan]

My Daughter is also 7 and you could be describing my girl.

She was diagnosed as having learning difficulties and is roughly 2 years behind although to me she can be more like a 2 year old in a 7 year old body, although sometimes she can act more like her age.

Yesterday was a very bad day for us and I could have so easily have just sat and cried out of frustration due to her behaviour.

If you ever need to chat, I am here and I know exactly what you are going through.

 

[deanosnana]

I think Paul up there is being selfish - I think you're just being a cautious mother. But that is my opinion of him which I am entitled to, and just the same, he is entitled to raise his children as he sees fit. And even more so, I totally and completely support his right to raise his children however he wants. I just happen to think he's doing his children a great disservice.

Someone who defends their reason for not putting their children on medication with excuses that are all about THEIR experiences, is being selfish. Which was my point from the beginning. It's NOT ABOUT THEM. It's about your CHILD'S future.

Again, I'm not really into the idea of plastering my life on a public forum, so if anyone has any specific questions, again, please message me.

I agree with you, 100%.

 

[tireeteam]

I've spoken to a doctor but she basically dismissed it within seconds, I'm thinking of making an appointment with another doctor. I've got 2 clients who have children with ADHD (diagnosed) and they're both under the impression that doctors don't want to give a diagnosis.

I don't want her on drugs or anything, I just want to know what's causing all this stress for me and my eldest daughter (she suffers as much as I do, bless her) I treat both girls the same and my eldest is like an angel compared to my youngest.

trust me - some doctors are hopeless. It was the speech therapist who noticed the autism in my 2 sons. There are all kinds of spectrums of learning disorders and any half decent doctor would have a bit of respect for a mothers gut instinct that something was not right. Stick to your guns and demand a referral to specialist from your doctor. If your doctor fails to do this then complain.

Also have a word with your practice nurse. I know pushy parents are a pain in the backside but I have had to become one of them to get my kids the help that they need. Truth is that help is not always forthcoming, you have to go get it. Sad but true. Good luck xx

 

[Paul Bryson]

I think Paul up there is being selfish...Someone who defends their reason for not putting their children on medication with excuses that are all about THEIR experiences, is being selfish.

Please carefully re-read what I wrote. You apparently missed something. I personally was forced to take Ritalin for 10 years. My "excuses" are indeed "all about my experiences" - my experiences of being on the medication myself.

We are making major financial and lifestyle sacrifices to do this. Our lives would be a lot more comfortable and easier if we'd just cave in, put the kids on drugs, and dump them in the public school system. It's precisely because we are NOT selfish, that we go to all this trouble. And we're certainly not alone in this -- a lot their friends are also homeschooled for various reasons.

Which was my point from the beginning. It's NOT ABOUT THEM. It's about your CHILD'S future."

Exactly.

 

[eskimonailtech]

Please carefully re-read what I wrote. You apparently missed something. I personally was forced to take Ritalin for 10 years. My "excuses" are indeed "all about my experiences" - my experiences of being on the medication myself.

We are making major financial and lifestyle sacrifices to do this. Our lives would be a lot more comfortable and easier if we'd just cave in, put the kids on drugs, and dump them in the public school system. It's precisely because we are NOT selfish, that we go to all this trouble. And we're certainly not alone in this -- a lot their friends are also homeschooled for various reasons.



Exactly.

So you think automatically because you had a bad experience on ONE medication, that it wont make a positive impact on your own sons?

I think you need a reality check.

 

[kirsty]

My Daughter is also 7 and you could be describing my girl.

She was diagnosed as having learning difficulties and is roughly 2 years behind although to me she can be more like a 2 year old in a 7 year old body, although sometimes she can act more like her age.

Yesterday was a very bad day for us and I could have so easily have just sat and cried out of frustration due to her behaviour.

If you ever need to chat, I am here and I know exactly what you are going through.

They sound very similar, I often feel like I have a 2 year old in the house! She still draws on the walls (there isn't a wall in the house that isn't covered in pen, paint, stickers or plasters lol), and still has tantrums like a 2 year old.

I'm pretty sure she doesn't have learning difficulties though, she is very clever, she's the youngest in her year group, but in her recent sats she scored the highest possible mark in both maths and english. I'm still wondering how she managed to sit still and concentrate long enough to complete these lol.

Yesterday was an awful day for us, at one point she ran out of the local shop screaming 'I hate you' and took off down the road! By lunch time I was on the phone to my mum saying 'talk to me - about anything just keep me sane' I was either going to scream or cry. Luckily I have a wonderful mum who offered to have them for the night to give me a break, so I'm sat here now in a child free zone. Time to clean up her mess before she comes home and does her 'whirlwind' thing and destroys the place again

 

[Pedifan]

I really do feel for you kirsty, I know how bad the tantrums can be.

Sadly my mum isnt in a position to have my daughter overnight so I never get a break from it.

 

[kirsty]

I really do feel for you kirsty, I know how bad the tantrums can be.

Sadly my mum isnt in a position to have my daughter overnight so I never get a break from it.

I really feel for you too hun :hug:

I get a break every now and then, usually when they go to their Dads in the school holidays. I'm not sure I could cope if it wasn't for these breaks, I don't know how you do it! I'm lucky as I will have a whole week with no children to look forward to in a couple of weeks, I think I'll just sleep :lol:

 

[Helen v]

Hi I felt i would share with you this link. DORE formerly DDAT
My son had absence seizure epilepsy as an infant which lead to all kinds of language and communication problems very similar to that of dyslexia. We came across this place as we wanted to do something to help. They deal with people with all kinds of issues from dyslexia through to full on aspergers. All i can say is it wasnt cheap but it turned things around for my son in a way that i didnt think would be possible. So for anyone that wants a slightly more complementary approach (as i wouldnt rule out meds but this would work along side) give them a look.

I personally cant recommend it highly enough. HTH x

 

[dandelionpoppy]

May I just say again: there is help out there.
I am assuming that any help on here is anecdotal; what you need is PROFESSIONAL help.
We none of us know what her needs are. We're guessing from our experiences.
Make a GP appointment tomorrow. First step.
Lots of hugs xx

 

[Missy G]

What an interesting thread ,I started a thread some time ago now about ADHD in girls I was interested to know if ADHD symptons were different in girls to boys,as my daughter aged 10 was showing the signs at home ,but not at school,apart from being behind in literacy and maths ,seemed to be ok.My husband was diagnosed with some form of ADHD when he was younger,at the time it had not been diagnosed ,his niece has some form of hyperactivity...not sure what its called now.. and his nephew has been diagnosed with ADHD, so I can only assume shes the next.

My daughter does seem to have some hyperactivity to me at home,cant seem to stick to doing the same thing for too long,no sense of danger,says she didnt do something when I blantenly saw her do it,has a short memory,screechs for no reasons,and several other things. I approached the Family support advisor at school who was going to look into her behaviour,but unfortunatly she has left ,and alot of changes went on in her school..head mistress wise..so I have now pulled her out since February this year...her report before breaking up before the summer holidays was pretty good they feel she still needs to improve on literacy and maths, I also had an issue recantly with her helping herself to other pupils stationary.:sad:

I have approached my GP years ago ,who replied..she seems fine to me and said if shes fine at school then theres no problem.

The thing that scares me is I was talking to a neighbour the other day who has a boy of 17 ,and he is on tag.. :suprised: ,and has ADHD.

It scares me to think would this be my daughter one day if I dont sort things out.Im going to see how we go in her last year at school,and if I still feel there is a problem Im seriously going to have to give it some push,before she goes to secondary school.