Difficult Massage Client (long Post sorry)

[Blissful_Beauty]

After being up and running for three months undertaken excllent training and having had a few funny/difficult/nice clients I have met the mother of all difficult ones. I am interested to hear how more experienced therapists would deal with this one! trying to keep it short first visit, 35 year old turns ups with her mother, i was unsure who the treament was for due to the crazy booking phone call I had received. It turned out to be mother although the daughter stayed for the whole full body Swedish massage talking and helping me by whisking towels and cushions out my hand. The lady was my last appointment that day and as soon as I had completed the massage to cries of "how do keep your arms in such good condition" the daughter asked for a manicure for mum due to a family event the next day long story short I did a file and polish. Daughter then tries to book a 8.30 full body for the next day, after explaning I do not book before 10 o clock she very reluctantly went, also during the file and polish she picked every nail colour/product up and tried to tell me how much better her own varnish was. I then did two very difficult massage for the daughter and sister the following week which included dealing with a two week old baby and eight year old. She booked and paid for eight treatments for mum and a further one for her self and bought a gift voucher. She can for a full body Swedish bringing her young daughter which was again a very difficult treatment to carry out professionally but I do feel I did the best in the circumstances, on finishing she promptly pushed me into a seat and began massaging my neck! it took me a couple of seconds to work out what was happening buy which time she was attempting to remove my tunic! during which it turned into a scuffle. I stood up and told her it was not acceptable to act in this way but she did not seem to understand and simply said she would let me know when she required her next treatment and went waving and smiling. I am going to refund her final payment but I do not know if I should refund the eight she bought her mother, she will not be in the country when her mother comes and her mother enjoyed her treatment very much i feel guilty, it is not about the money I gave her a very good discount for the bookings due to amount, your thoughts would be very helpful as this has upset me. Sorry for the length of the post but it is not an easy situation to explain.

 

[Diana-Jane]

If anyone behaved that way in my work environment and made me feel that uncomfortable, i absolutely wouldn't see them again! If you see the mum again you need to be firm and tell the daughter she can't be in the room during treatment. She sounds like trouble!

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[Mrs RSM]

Oh my goodness! If that was a man you would more than likely call the police. I would refund and refuse to treat any of them, that way you will avoid the daughter. I am really shocked, we concern ourselves with male clients approaching us but no women. Hope you get it sorted.

 

[Blissful_Beauty]

Thank you both, I will cancel mum as I do not want the daughter, as you say if this had been a male it would have involved the police I would not feel comfortable with any of the family.

 

[Ellebelle]

Oh how awful for you. You're absolutely right to cancel all appointments. I know this is a shame for the mother who will lose out on her lovely massages, but you need to have no reason for the daughter to contact you again. Perhaps she can explain why to her mother.

Hope you're ok x

 

[Blissful_Beauty]

Thank you it has made me a little wary as I work alone but it has helped just hearing from other professionals thank you all x

 

[salonone]

Yes sack them all. I too had a similar incident while performing a massage on a female. As I was standing massaging her upper back a hand started to massage me I stopped the treatment - asked the client to dress and leave the salon. One never knows.

 

[sukic]

How bizarre!!! I would refund all monies and refuse to treat. Just tell her she made you feel very uncomfortable and that she may be better off finding another therapist. That would have freaked me out to be honest. Whenever I have another person in the room they have always behaved and just sat and watched or chatted with their friend. Some people are odd!

 

[BotoxBoy]

Don't refund! Cancel both and say you'll report them for harassment if they complain. Tell the mother to get the refund from the daughter! Bizarre pair!

 

[hippy-chick]

its a shame that you have to refuse the mum because of her daughter's behaviour.

it does sound very bizarre.

 

[anca14]

Why don’t you say, you have spoken with your insurance company and you are only allowed to have one person in the treatment room.
So you can still treat her mother and hopefully not see the daughter.

 

[Matthew Taylor]

"if it was a male"......
What difference does that make?
If youve been assaulted by male or female then you should call the police!!
The gender of the client has nothing to do with it!!!

 

[tiggerlady]

Is it at all possible that the lady is a therapist (or thinks she is one, hence the 'helping'!) and was trying to 'repay' your good massage you did on her mother? Just a thought... and if she assaulted you, as Matthew says, gender should not be an issue. I would def only ever have one person in the room,and definately no children.. the others can wait in the car..I appreciate that sometimes clients feel a little nervous going to a persons house for the first time and therefore would like someone to come with them, same as we would like to have someone in the house, purely as reassurance, but afterwards, show them to the door and what they do for the hour or so is up to them...Ultimately you have to do what you feel is right for you, but if the daughter isnt going to be there when mother comes again,then I would give it one more try and see how it goes? xx

 

[hippy-chick]

thats the vibe that I got too, that she was either a therapist, a failed therapist or a wannabee, hence her comments about your varnishes, and her jumping up to help, like she was trying to prove that she knew what you were doing and she was pre-empting you.

I'll give you an example, I did a talk on holistic/beauty therapies and had been to this venue many times, I was introduced to a new person and was told she did what I did, ie she was a qualified beauty therapist.

What a total pita she was, she talked over me, finished my sentences and frowned and tutted loudly when she obviously didn't agree with what I was saying. she basically was saying "I am an expert, I am on par with you".

I changed tact halfway thru and suddenly thrust her into the limelight (wicked I know). She was obviously an "old school" taught therapist and hadn't done any new training in a decade. so I started spouting new standards and then would stare at her and say "isn't that right Rachel"....she just looked flustered, I continued to do this on a number of points then said, "oh and of course the latest thing is.....Rachel?"

lets just say she soon drew back and didn't draw attention to herself after that.

Now, I as a trainer attend at least 3 training courses a year. I always sit back and enjoy the course, I dont feel the need to push myself forward and don't go out of my way to preempt the tutor or question her/him infront of people to score cheap points.

My gut is telling me, she has watched a few u tube clips and has suddenly decided she is an expert.

but, you know what happened with the assault, no one should be subjected to that. withdraw your services to this individual.

 

[izzidoll]

Why don’t you say, you have spoken with your insurance company and you are only allowed to have one person in the treatment room.
So you can still treat her mother and hopefully not see the daughter.

Good advice....I honestly was very surprised that another person would be in the room whilst you carried out a massage anyway, surely that is not normal practise??

As for this girl, I think she obviously has some kind of issues and is well avoided !!

 

[Tigan]

yeiks ! NO WAY
thats just terrible

 

[Tigan]

alright if it had been a good looking young man, teeheehee, (im only kidding)
they are completely strange and creepy by the sounds of it, i wouldnt want them anywhere near me, you know the difference yourself because ordinary clients would never behave like this, i wouldnt let them back if i were you, and if your friendly with other therapists nearby i'd warn them about those two

 

[pinkgirlie]

Omg! Hope u r ok xx

 

[Lunarstorm]

"if it was a male"......
What difference does that make?
If youve been assaulted by male or female then you should call the police!!
The gender of the client has nothing to do with it!!!

I totaly agree with this comment, if it was me, I'd call the police as assault is assault regardless of the gender of the individuals involed

 

[Blissful_Beauty]

Many thanks again for all your replies, as a number of you have pointed out gender is not the issue and I hope I have not offended any one with the post, I have taken on board all your thoughts which have helped me, the daughter has a hairdressing salon in another country so the remarks re wanting to become a therapist do sound very feasable when I think about what she was saying, reading the posts has enabled me to understand better and make me sure I do not want them to return it feels like a fine line between wanting to be a therapist and a little bit too much enthusiasum and totally over stepping the ethic line which ever I would not feel comfortable to have them in my salon and have also decided I need an audible alarm I can activate if a situation like this happens again with which ever gender.