Is it OK to tell your child or someone else they are fat?

[Elaine Armani]

I was a chubby child when I was 10-12 yrs old nd my mum told me not the eat sweets and put me in gymnastics.
Eventually I lost the weight, if it's your child that will grow to be obese then yes you tell them because they're young and don't know how and why it will affect them.
Other than that I would never tell someone that isn't my young child that they're fat.
Some partners tell each other that they're fat but not many.
I still wouldn't tell my partner he was fat (if he was).

 

[tina10]

I think i am lucky my oldest and youngest are take from their dad it doesn't matter how much they eat they just don't put any weight . My oldest always so skinny sometime my friends say to me feed him more food :-(But my second one he is bit like me we don't eat as much as others but we not skinny like they. But we not over weight . I like take them to different activity they jump run all the time . Sometimes too much . Yes I wouldn't tell her but I would take her a sports she likes I mean even not for lost weight but for the sake of health and I always believe at least have one sports or two and make them like habit are good for the life time for them. In mean while find some nice suit her sharp clothes cuz I believe better dress can make different how you feel. You can show her you can be dress nice even you not skinny. Hope that will helpful xx

 

[Sam81]

As an aside and I'm not denying obesity or unhealthy lifestyles, but it does make you wonder with all that going on, as a society we are all living longer. Seems to contradict doesn't it? I'm assuming with modern medicine and medical breakthroughs, we are perhaps living longer because of that. Makes you wonder though doesn't it?

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When you think about it though, the men and women who are living longer are those who grew up on post war rations, making and growing food from scratch, eating what they needed not through greed and before fast food, games consoles and the technology we use every day to make our lives 'easier' (lazier). In 50 years will we be as healthy as those old people are now? Doubt it.

Sorry to go off topic! My two children are of a healthy weight at the minute, if they weren't I would consider it my fault as what they eat and how much activity they do is under my control right now. It's up to me while they are young to teach them healthy habits which will hopefully last them a lifetime. Just my opinion.

 

[Kim Lawless]

As a fat person myself, who was a fat child, I would never tell a child they were fat. There are other ways of saying it and encouraging them. Overrating as a child can often come from emotional issues, so to be told 'you're fat' is another nail in the coffin.

My parents and siblings were slim to skinny and they didn't really mention my weight apart from a few occasions in my lifetime and I could quote verbatim exactly what they said and where I was standing when they said it. Very hurtful but it only makes you run (or waddle lol) for the biscuit tin.

 

[w1nnie]

I've no idea how you say this one, I think it's a doctors job to tell them. I have one strapping lad and one quite skinny one, and he is always amazed to see someone skinnier than himself.

 

[Nikki May]

My whole childhood and teens I was told by my parents and grandparents I was fat. It was heartbreaking for me and made me feel awful. I tried every diet under the sun from an early age and you know what looking at old school photos now I wasn't fat I'm the same size as all my class mates. The problem was my 2 twin cousins who I grew up with and my brother were so slim of course I looked big next to them in they eyes of my family. Even now in our ,30's my cousins are a size 6 and I'm a healthy average 12 but I feel that massive plump kid at family get togethers.

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[adamlea87]

As an aside and I'm not denying obesity or unhealthy lifestyles, but it does make you wonder with all that going on, as a society we are all living longer. Seems to contradict doesn't it? I'm assuming with modern medicine and medical breakthroughs, we are perhaps living longer because of that. Makes you wonder though doesn't it?

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http://www.independent.co.uk/life-s...hildren-die-before-their-parents-8757812.html

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[nicole333]

I work with people who have Eating Disorders as a result of Psychological Disorders, so all your thoughts and opinions on this has been really interesting for me to read.

 

[kinkyboots33]

There are serious health issues about being overweight. My daughter is now 19 and im guessing around 5/6 stone overweight, I worry alot about the health ussues. Iv tried to be kind, encouraging and down right honest - nothing has worked and I seriously worry for her as u can see her getting bigger and bigger :-(

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[ch-ela]

I work with people who have Eating Disorders as a result of Psychological Disorders, so all your thoughts and opinions on this has been really interesting for me to read.

I would be interested to hear a professional opinion on this subject. Is there anything you would like to add?

 

[nicole333]

I would be interested to hear a professional opinion on this subject. Is there anything you would like to add?

Although I have found everybody's opinion an interesting read, I have no wish to open such a can of worms on a beauty forum :wink2:

It's massive and more complex than people may think, so not appropriate for me to comment I feel.

 

[xxAmyxx]

Over eating is a disease just like being an alcoholic! Telling someone they are fat just makes them feel worse especially when they don't feel strong enough to do something about.

 

[mm29]

Over eating is a disease just like being an alcoholic! Telling someone they are fat just makes them feel worse especially when they don't feel strong enough to do something about.

In some cases this may be the case but certainly not all and esp with children,

Anyway if someone was addicted to drugs or alcohol would you not tell them how bad it's became incase you hurt their feelings,

Sorry but most people need to hear the hard truth

 

[blossom]

As far as I can see, it is never acceptable to insult someone and call them fat, or skin and bones for that matter, you wouldn't say it to your friends or neighbours, why on earth does it become acceptable to insult your children?

If you think there's an issue, your job as a mum is to inspire, take a strong interest in healthy eating yourself, do some regular exercise, maybe together, buy in healthy food and fewer snacks, or healthier snacks. Above all cut down on the sugar, simple refined sugar is the devil itself. Involve the kids in how the whole family can be healthier.

It's so convenient to point a finger isnt it and say whose fault it is, but it isn't cut and dried like that. A number of things lead to people and kids being overweight. And a number of things can address the issue. But being rude and insulting to your kids isn't one of them.

 

[virtues2011]

I tell my daughter that she needs to watch what she is eating quite a lot, and I tell her when she puts on weight....a bit cheeky I suppose - said from mother 'slim' sat here sitting behind a desk eating a box of chocolates.......!

My parents told me all my life to lose weight, stop eating, I'm fat....my mother told me on my wedding day standing in my wedding dress how fat I looked.....oh well! Whatever!

I know I have to lose two stone and next year I will - when I am ready to. It took me 25 years to stop smoking...give me a break!

 

[tonicj]

As far as I can see, it is never acceptable to insult someone and call them fat, or skin and bones for that matter, you wouldn't say it to your friends or neighbours, why on earth does it become acceptable to insult your children?

If you think there's an issue, your job as a mum is to inspire, take a strong interest in healthy eating yourself, do some regular exercise, maybe together, buy in healthy food and fewer snacks, or healthier snacks. Above all cut down on the sugar, simple refined sugar is the devil itself. Involve the kids in how the whole family can be healthier.

It's so convenient to point a finger isnt it and say whose fault it is, but it isn't cut and dried like that. A number of things lead to people and kids being overweight. And a number of things can address the issue. But being rude and insulting to your kids isn't one of them.

Exactly blossom!

 

[Kim Lawless]

I tell my daughter that she needs to watch what she is eating quite a lot, and I tell her when she puts on weight....a bit cheeky I suppose - said from mother 'slim' sat here sitting behind a desk eating a box of chocolates.......!

My parents told me all my life to lose weight, stop eating, I'm fat....my mother told me on my wedding day standing in my wedding dress how fat I looked.....oh well! Whatever!

I know I have to lose two stone and next year I will - when I am ready to. It took me 25 years to stop smoking...give me a break!

You know I luv ya but you don't fool me because I know that behind your humour is a huge heart and a sensitive soul.

Seriously, your mum saying that on your wedding day is disgraceful………but you know that and you still remember how hurt you felt (you don't fool me). :hug::hug:

 

[virtues2011]

You know I luv ya but you don't fool me because I know that behind your humour is a huge heart and a sensitive soul.

Seriously, your mum saying that on your wedding day is disgraceful………but you know that and you still remember how hurt you felt (you don't fool me). :hug::hug:

Oh yes Kim - there are plenty of reasons why I don't speak to either of my parents! nor have I for many years.....I took my mother out for a meal sometime after my wedding probably a year or so after, in fact it was on my birthday..I dropped her off but before she got out of the car I said to her "Mother this is the last time I will be seeing you and these are the reasons why..." and I have never seen or spoken to her again that was 6 years ago. My father was even more bizzare... A long story so will start at the end....I was 25 and was meant to be going to see him one weekend as it happened I was having some wardrobes fitted so I sent an email and explained that I would have to re arrange to the following weekend hoped he was ok and I would see him soon with my daughter. His reply was " If you don't come and see me at the weekend I never want to see you again" ...I never saw him again that was 16 years ago! I will never agree with the comment 'you can choose your friends but not your family" You can make any decision you want! This is where my drive for success comes from purely to prove a point to both of them, although it will never be proven!

 

[tonicj]

Oh yes Kim - there are plenty of reasons why I don't speak to either of my parents! nor have I for many years.....I took my mother out for a meal sometime after my wedding probably a year or so after, in fact it was on my birthday..I dropped her off but before she got out of the car I said to her "Mother this is the last time I will be seeing you and these are the reasons why..." and I have never seen or spoken to her again that was 6 years ago. My father was even more bizzare... A long story so will start at the end....I was 25 and was meant to be going to see him one weekend as it happened I was having some wardrobes fitted so I sent an email and explained that I would have to re arrange to the following weekend hoped he was ok and I would see him soon with my daughter. His reply was " If you don't come and see me at the weekend I never want to see you again" ...I never saw him again that was 16 years ago! I will never agree with the comment 'you can choose your friends but not your family" You can make any decision you want! This is where my drive for success comes from purely to prove a point to both of them, although it will never be proven!

:hug:

 

[tina10]

I tell my daughter that she needs to watch what she is eating quite a lot, and I tell her when she puts on weight....a bit cheeky I suppose - said from mother 'slim' sat here sitting behind a desk eating a box of chocolates.......!

My parents told me all my life to lose weight, stop eating, I'm fat....my mother told me on my wedding day standing in my wedding dress how fat I looked.....oh well! Whatever!

I know I have to lose two stone and next year I will - when I am ready to. It took me 25 years to stop smoking...give me a break!

I know how you feel I have mother like that , she didn't say anything on my wedding cuz she wasn't there . I can imaging if she was there she would have so much to say about my weight , my hair , my dress . Her opinion is way much more important than my happiness .when I went visited her after my oldest was one she was saying I am fat every single day at least once I am fat :-( (for6 weeks ). But I was size 12 , ok compare her size 6-8 I am big . But she has never enjoy her food she eating
for sake of living , on the other hand I love my food I don't eat junks .It is very hard ignore your family especial your own mother and hurt the most .