Mental illness, social anxiety etc?

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Aphrodite26

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How's everyone doing? I'm having a dark and twisty day today :( keep feeling like I'm going to burst in to tears for no reason. I feel so drained.
Hope everyone else is having an "up" day xx


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Elaine Armani

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Hi guys,
I suffer from depression, my psychiatrist refuses to give me any anti depressants because she believes that I can get through it without relying in any medication, my story is an extremely long one, from an extremely toxic relationship to losing close people and money issues.
Last year in around July I completely sunk and found it really hard to get through my beauty therapy course but I made it...
I was doing hair extensions from home but I completely gave up because I was just so depressed to deal with people and etc.
Now I'm finally trying to follow my dream and complete my hairdressing courses, I need $2000 to pay for my equipment which is obviously money I don't have but will need to borrow it all to get where I want to be, I'm trying to design and build my own brand of eyelashes but I have deferred it so I can cover my hairdressing course.
Life is completely ****, my dad is schizophrenic and pretty much can barely work so my family struggle but I'm thankful that they're extremely loving and supportive, I may not have bad issues comparing to other peoples lives but I used to be a very weak person and that was enough for me to sink I'm now trying my hardest to get where I want to be career wise and my life pretty much revolves around positive thinking now, i constantly stay up all night and imagine how I wanted my life to be and I imagine that the people I've lost are in it, sometimes I drive myself mad, but now I pretty much say to myself "deal with it you can't have it all" I've become very very strong but almost emotionally numb, I don't believe my depression is caused by a chemical imbalance, it's purely caused by my issues.
I've also suffered from anxiety since I was 6 years old, sometimes it's hard for me to concentrate and not give up.
All in all, life is what we choose to make if it, now I'm trying to accept that the people I've lost are gone and to move in but I never once think to myself that "they'll come back when the times right" who knows, maybe they will, maybe they won't, all I know is that it helps me cope.
I'm trying my best and that's all that we can do.
Here's my thoughts and emotions, I don't tell anyone about any of this but it's nice to sometimes let it out.
The only advice is to never give up :)
x
 

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Hi guys,
I suffer from depression, my psychiatrist refuses to give me any anti depressants because she believes that I can get through it without relying in any medication, my story is an extremely long one, from an extremely toxic relationship to losing close people and money issues.
Last year in around July I completely sunk and found it really hard to get through my beauty therapy course but I made it...
I was doing hair extensions from home but I completely gave up because I was just so depressed to deal with people and etc.
Now I'm finally trying to follow my dream and complete my hairdressing courses, I need $2000 to pay for my equipment which is obviously money I don't have but will need to borrow it all to get where I want to be, I'm trying to design and build my own brand of eyelashes but I have deferred it so I can cover my hairdressing course.
Life is completely ****, my dad is schizophrenic and pretty much can barely work so my family struggle but I'm thankful that they're extremely loving and supportive, I may not have bad issues comparing to other peoples lives but I used to be a very weak person and that was enough for me to sink I'm now trying my hardest to get where I want to be career wise and my life pretty much revolves around positive thinking now, i constantly stay up all night and imagine how I wanted my life to be and I imagine that the people I've lost are in it, sometimes I drive myself mad, but now I pretty much say to myself "deal with it you can't have it all" I've become very very strong but almost emotionally numb, I don't believe my depression is caused by a chemical imbalance, it's purely caused by my issues.
I've also suffered from anxiety since I was 6 years old, sometimes it's hard for me to concentrate and not give up.
All in all, life is what we choose to make if it, now I'm trying to accept that the people I've lost are gone and to move in but I never once think to myself that "they'll come back when the times right" who knows, maybe they will, maybe they won't, all I know is that it helps me cope.
I'm trying my best and that's all that we can do.
Here's my thoughts and emotions, I don't tell anyone about any of this but it's nice to sometimes let it out.
The only advice is to never give up :)
x
Then medication probably isn't the best route for you Elaine, maybe if and when you feel ready counselling? I know that's quite hard and something I tried once at 18 and it made me 100 times worse. If not just keep talking to everyone here! It's strangely therapeutic. I have a host of social issues in my family including schizophrenia depression being in care and drug abuse. I spent many years being very depressed. Now I'm fine, but I'm 30 now. sometimes it takes the best part of ones 20s to find yourself and to learn how to deal with all the sh*t life throws at you!

Chin up!!!
 

Elaine Armani

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Then medication probably isn't the best route for you Elaine, maybe if and when you feel ready counselling? I know that's quite hard and something I tried once at 18 and it made me 100 times worse. If not just keep talking to everyone here! It's strangely therapeutic. I have a host of social issues in my family including schizophrenia depression being in care and drug abuse. I spent many years being very depressed. Now I'm fine, but I'm 30 now. sometimes it takes the best part of ones 20s to find yourself and to learn how to deal with all the sh*t life throws at you!

Chin up!!!
Thanks for your advice Hazel :)
I see my psychiatrist every fortnight and talk to her, if I'm honest I don't think it really helps, if pretty much learnt to help myself and think positive.
I'm slowly dealing with it all but I do have some bad days, I know that I will get out of it one day and that really helps.
In my situation, it's all in my head, my thoughts are the only thing that will help, I come on here and I automatically feel like I'm at peace with myself.
Life is simple, it's just what you make if it!
 

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Thanks for your advice Hazel :)
I see my psychiatrist every fortnight and talk to her, if I'm honest I don't think it really helps, if pretty much learnt to help myself and think positive.
I'm slowly dealing with it all but I do have some bad days, I know that I will get out of it one day and that really helps.
In my situation, it's all in my head, my thoughts are the only thing that will help, I come on here and I automatically feel like I'm at peace with myself.
Life is simple, it's just what you make if it!
It really is, and it's all too short! You will pick yourself up, your young, in time you learn to manage with it all. I still feel sad about certain things but I don't let it consume me anymore- 10 years ago I was a wreck!
One thing which picks me up is my nails, it makes me so happy doing this and gives me something to work towards!

Xxx
 

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As for the OP and some of the others, this depression sounds very different to the type which I suffered... I really hope you find a way through the dark periods... I have every faith that everyone of us here is a strong person, why else would we be here after all? pushing ourselves within our careers?! Even if your not good in social situations coming here and admitting it is a very brave thing. At least here there are people who understand!


Xxx
 

Fante

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Hey kaylienails, I work at a salon and deal with anxiety/social anxiety/depression. So I know a lot of days aren't easy. You asked if going outside your comfort zone helps. I think it does, only in baby steps at our own pace, we prove to ourselves we can do it. Suddenly one day something that seemed so hard isn't as bad. You might trip and fall one day, but that's ok everyone does you just gotta try again. Staying in your comfort zone always and remaining stagnant wont improve the situation. I'm just saying from experience. Check out Meetup.com or google support groups in your area. I joined a social anxiety group on Meetup, and it's been helpful. Being able to relate to others and even laugh at it sometimes is really helpful. Make sure you have downtime after work, some "me" time to decompress. Do things outside of work that make you happy and more connected. Just keep on truckin! You are capable of a lot more than you realize, bad thoughts just make us think we aren't. Good luck doll
 

KaylieNails

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Thank you guys it's all something to think about I personally feel as though things can only get better and that thought alone is really helping xx

Hey kaylienails, I work at a salon and deal with anxiety/social anxiety/depression. So I know a lot of days aren't easy. You asked if going outside your comfort zone helps. I think it does, only in baby steps at our own pace, we prove to ourselves we can do it. Suddenly one day something that seemed so hard isn't as bad. You might trip and fall one day, but that's ok everyone does you just gotta try again. Staying in your comfort zone always and remaining stagnant wont improve the situation. I'm just saying from experience. Check out Meetup.com or google support groups in your area. I joined a social anxiety group on Meetup, and it's been helpful. Being able to relate to others and even laugh at it sometimes is really helpful. Make sure you have downtime after work, some "me" time to decompress. Do things outside of work that make you happy and more connected. Just keep on truckin! You are capable of a lot more than you realize, bad thoughts just make us think we aren't. Good luck doll
Hi fante, it is understandably hard for us all I think, sometimes I hold onto the thought that if it werent for having to socialise at work I might be in a much darker placr because sometimes its easier to just sit at home lock the doors and become a recluse, and if you do , theres practically no coming back from that , I might try one of those groups but the only problem with it is I find people difficult thats one of my issues, im convinced everyone has a false agenda amd I can sit here now and say its all in my head but when the time comes it's back to thinking there out to get me. I think ill try the groups though as relating is a huge relief. Thank you hun

Ohh another question does anyone struggle with going places on there own? The bank, town, the dentist /doctors ? Im 21 years old and I have to get my nana to sit in my appointments lmao I bet I look a right nugget but I just cant go alone. I also struggle to pay at shops , I will not order food at like
Mcdonalds etc theres no chance And I struggle eat infront of people I have to strategically choose seating but before that I wouldn't do it at all. Just wondered if anyone else struggled?

Thanks again to you all your a massive help. Sorry I cant individuallly reply to you all but I have read
and took in everything everyone has saif and it means alot thankyou xxxxx

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KaylieNails

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How's everyone doing? I'm having a dark and twisty day today :( keep feeling like I'm going to burst in to tears for no reason. I feel so drained.
Hope everyone else is having an "up" day xx

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Hiya sugar, by the sounds of it better than you atm , ive just been trying to focus on the beautiful things in my life like my partner and my family... and my cat 😝. Its helped quite alot more than I thought. If you need to cry then cry ! Sometimes you just need to amd it can help for a while. Really hope you get better soon :( if theres anything you want to get of your chest without putting it for loads to see my inbox is always open xxx



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Fante

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Thank you guys it's all something to think about I personally feel as though things can only get better and that thought alone is really helping xx



Hi fante, it is understandably hard for us all I think, sometimes I hold onto the thought that if it werent for having to socialise at work I might be in a much darker placr because sometimes its easier to just sit,,might try one of those groups but the only problem with it is I find people difficult thats one of my issues, im convinced everyone has a false agenda amd I can sit here now and say its all in my head but when the time comes it's back to thinking there out to get me. I think ill try the groups though as relating is a huge relief. Thank you hun

Ohh another question does anyone struggle with going places on there own? The bank, town, the dentist /doctors ? Im 21 years old and I have to get my nana to sit in my appointments lmao I bet I look a right nugget but I just cant go alone. I also struggle to pay at shops , I will not order food at like
Mcdonalds etc theres no chance And I struggle eat infront of people I have to strategically choose seating but before that I wouldn't do it at all. Just wondered if anyone else struggled?

Thanks again to you all your a massive help. Sorry I cant individuallly reply to you all but I have read
and took in everything everyone has saif and it means alot thankyou xxxxx

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Hey, I know what you mean about socializing at work or you'd feel like a big recluse. It's good, even if its superficial sometimes to talk to people and be surrounded by them. Over time hopefully it helps break down the barrier, and makes it easier to talk to others. I try to think of it as practice sometimes and it's helped me some.
As far as going to join a group, I understand you feel you don't trust people easily, but some others there will feel the same way. That fear is just part of the anxiety itself, and it will feel uncomfortable going to the meetups sometimes, but it's worth it.
I also have the problem going certain places alone. It used to be everywhere but overtime with practice I go most places alone. I just can't drive far distances alone or I get scared. I struggle with talking to cashiers and ordering things most of the time but you just have to keep doing it as often as you can. Not doing so only enables that fear to continue. It keeps you prisoner to your anxiety and controls your freedom and comfort. I wear my headphones and listen to music or standup comedy when in the stores a lot, it helps :)
 

KaylieNails

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Thanks so much! Means alot xxxx

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persianista

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These type of illnesses are more common than you think in our industry. You're not alone. In between insisting that your doctor takes you seriously, practice putting on your salon face. It will seem insurmountable at first, but the more you practice it, the easier it gets. I can go from wreck to 'happy' in a nanosecond, and the client would never know. It's pure practice. Being able to present a salon front doesn't negate how you feel inside, it just stops you being in a vicious circle, as the more you moan or offload onto clients, the less success you have.
 

KaylieNails

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These type of illnesses are more common than you think in our industry. You're not alone. In between insisting that your doctor takes you seriously, practice putting on your salon face. It will seem insurmountable at first, but the more you practice it, the easier it gets. I can go from wreck to 'happy' in a nanosecond, and the client would never know. It's pure practice. Being able to present a salon front doesn't negate how you feel inside, it just stops you being in a vicious circle, as the more you moan or offload onto clients, the less success you have.
The thing I struggle with most is waking up that way out, putting my salon face on and then an awkward client walks through the door and I find it excruciating to keep my cool while they persistently irritate me. X

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persianista

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Yes, it's not easy. It takes a lot of inner strength. Although to be fair, if you are getting up and into work whilst in the grip of this, you've already demonstrated that you have a steel backbone.
Just remember that almost all nastiness levelled at us is borne of the perpetrators inner unhappiness. All bullying behaviour is borne of jealousy. Knowing that sometimes makes the awkward squad easier to deal with.
None of us ever really know what drives people to be nasty, but we can disassociate ourselves from it, and not give them the luxury of a response.
 

Kim Lawless

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I'm really sad to read that you're feeling like this and good for you to continue working and hiding it as best you can. People are kind but nobody likes to be around someone that's always depressed.

Like many others I too have been plagued with depression throughout my life and been hospitalised. If you met me you'd never believe it so I never judge a book my it's cover.

During my darkest days I did everything in my power to get better, from prescribed medication which was a life saver, to self help books, counselling, meditation etc etc.

Looking back I would have to say that positive thinking and life coaching (setting goals) helped me the most.

The best bit of advice that I was given was………don't listen to sad songs, don't watch sad films and don't read the papers or watch the news.

The best bit of advice that I gave myself was to get rid of people that drag me down and drain me. I'm always there for friends with troubles or who are feeling depressed themselves but they're not negative people……..they are just going through hard times. I'm talking about nasty people; they're the ones that you want to get out of your life if you can. If I get people on forums that dig me out and I know they hate me, even though they have never met me, I block them so I don't have to feel their negative energy coming at me through the screen.

On a spiritual level, basically I put myself in a bubble to protect myself and every night I put those people that I dislike or have been bitchy to me that day in a lovely pink bubble and I wish them luck and love and I ask the universe to take them off of my path. It's never fails. That way you're getting them out of your life in a positive way as I believe that if you wish bad on someone it'll come back on me.

It's a long hard slog and you will probably never be 100% well but start today by taking positive action and you'll feel an improvement within days.

Good luck and I wish you well.:hug:
 

babychops

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Thank you guys it's all something to think about I personally feel as though things can only get better and that thought alone is really helping xx


Ohh another question does anyone struggle with going places on there own? The bank, town, the dentist /doctors ? Im 21 years old and I have to get my nana to sit in my appointments lmao I bet I look a right nugget but I just cant go alone. I also struggle to pay at shops , I will not order food at like
Mcdonalds etc theres no chance And I struggle eat infront of people I have to strategically choose seating but before that I wouldn't do it at all. Just wondered if anyone else struggled?


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I feel like this when I go to most places. I get terribly anxious when I'm going to the doctors or the dentist. I feel like I'm gonna have a panic attack! I get my husband to order my food as I'm too nervous to lol the way I deal with it is that I have just accepted this is who I am. I'm just a nervous person. In the past if I got really anxious about something I would get very upset and depressed. Now I just think to myself "next time I'll be better, so I got a little nervous, who cares". Might sound weird but this is how I cope with social anxiety. It's very hard working with the public when your anxious but I think that's what keeps you going and stops you from giving up x
 

Jadie-23

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Hi geeks im really struggling at the moment as my mental health seems to be further deteriorating. Ive suffered with body dysmorphic disorder, social anxiety and quite severe depression my entire life however its getting so much worse. Im self employed in the beauty industry and rent from some one elses salon but im struggling to face people or go into work lately and obviously this is a huge barrier. Iv tried endless amounts of anti depressants counselling etc but nothin seems to work. I was just wondering if theres anyone else here that suffers with anything similar and how you cope etc. I hate feeling like I cant relate to anyone its so awkward trying to explain to my boyfriend he tries to be there though bless him.

Hope to hear soon x
To the OP I hope you are feeling better! Love that this is being discussed with heartfelt concern and care. To some it is still a taboo subject not to be talked about. I don't have many friends but I know who I can and can't talk too when I feel down!!

Personally I have an issue eating in front of people too, even long standing friends!

I am currently on a moderate dose of anti depressants and waiting (11 months!) for CBT. Can't say as I'm too sure the tablets are working but I'm also on cerezette and have a feeling this could be effecting my mood also, anyone else??? But it is my only option for contraception.

Years of dealing with joe public in retail/call centre/pubs have left me feeling well, numb! People can be horrible and so my customer service in my day job isn't what it used to be lol

I'm hoping my nails will take off and dealing with customers who want me for my work will be better although I am more than prepared for difficult customers lol!

Everyday feels like Groundhog Day at the moment. Same rubbish different day! Breaking into beauty is a double edge sword though. One side I'm exited and can't come quick enough. The other thinks should I bother in a saturated market / will I be good enough / big gamble for a single parent! I am a perfectionist and a control freak and hate not knowing where I stand!

Sorry for the long post :) xxx
 

Welsheeyore

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Hi all,
This is the first time I've been in the chit chat section. Was so happy to see this thread and know I'm not alone.

I've had several bad bouts of depression through my life, this current one brought on by the stress of my job as a vets practice manager working for a husband and wife and being bullied and treated like sh*t. I reached breaking point and my GP signed me off for two weeks - employers response was to send letter of dismissal by Facebook within 2 hours of me telling them (says it all really)

I am retraining and going to become a mobile nail tech so can set my own hours etc and work around what is right for my family.

I am on medication and have found who my true friends are and have a wonderful husband.

I too have struggled with even going to the shops on my own and panicking in crowds etc.

It's so nice to know that I'm not alone. Xx



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pinkknailss

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I am struggeling at the moment. Getting really bad anxiety going into shops or when I'm in town. I genuinly think people are stairing at me, it drives me crazy! Because I really think they are! My sister said its my imagination but my friends say people are?! So I don't really like going out for a long time for that reason aswell as I am super paranoid I'll see my horrible ex boyfriend whom I am still in love with and have a panic attack and die.

Does anyone else feel no one, even their doctor doent believe they are ill? I feel like I have to convince them I'm crazy? That this is a serious issue that I need help for? They did NOT want to sign me off work! Really annoying. Everyone in my imidate family has depression and other stuff. And if you haven't noticed I stopped taking my medication! Lol see how much it can change someone from nearly house bound to perfectly functioning? Crazy huh?!
 

KaylieNails

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I am struggeling at the moment. Getting really bad anxiety going into shops or when I'm in town. I genuinly think people are stairing at me, it drives me crazy! Because I really think they are! My sister said its my imagination but my friends say people are?! So I don't really like going out for a long time for that reason aswell as I am super paranoid I'll see my horrible ex boyfriend whom I am still in love with and have a panic attack and die.

Does anyone else feel no one, even their doctor doent believe they are ill? I feel like I have to convince them I'm crazy? That this is a serious issue that I need help for? They did NOT want to sign me off work! Really annoying. Everyone in my imidate family has depression and other stuff. And if you haven't noticed I stopped taking my medication! Lol see how much it can change someone from nearly house bound to perfectly functioning? Crazy huh?!
Thats crazy because this describes me. The thing is im 100 .. no 10000% sure people ARE Staring. my boyfriend says its because im beautiful haha bless him but thats deffo not the case. Maybe because we assume people will stare we have an energy that makes them stare? Im not sure but they definitely stare. Ive always said if I didn't feel like some sort of bad celeb in town my anxiety would be halved. Its awful. This also adds to why I cant eat in restaurants etc as I get clumsy with food when I feel someone's looking and 9 times outa 10 multiple people are. Maybe depressed people look different lol. Ive stopped my meds too I knocked everything on the head including contraception pills as I didnt know what my natural self was anymore however I don't feel much different so I don't think my anti depressants even worked but when I was initially put on them she wouldn't give me high doses or strong pills as I was really underweight or something so maybe when I put abit if podge on they weren't strong enough?





And to everyone else thank you. Your not just helping me, your helping us all. its the worst thing to think your alone in depression and its nice to compare feelings and thoughts and my inbox is always open. I wish you all well and huge amounts of happiness :) I was going to try reply to all comments however im going to be late for the dreaded w.o.r.k

Lovessss xxxxxxxxx
 

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