what do i do now? Is this still gonna work?

[emily22]

Hi, as some of you know ive recently set up being mobile. I got accepted this wk for a small loan with the princes trust. I sign the paperwork nxt wk and meet my mentor.

The only thing is ive just discovered im pregnant. I dont know what to do now with regards to the biz. I had an ectopic in july this year and lost a tube - I though id lost all hope of having another baby, so as much as this is a shock as we wasnt planning to try again now, this baby is now the most important thing in my life along with my other two kids.
My husband thinks the biz will go down the drain now, tbh my heads all over right now so it wasnt my first concern. But my plan is to continue my biz and work as far as i can, have the baby and then contiune after wards but on a part time basis such as evenings only (which are mainly when my clients want me anyway..)

What do you think? Has anyone else here been in this situation and if so - what did you do and how did it work out?....

 

[oey]

If I was in your situation the pregnancy would be my first and only priority, but you need to do what your heart tells you.

If you accept the loan can you defer starting until after you have had the baby? What terms have the loan been crated on? Any restrictions?

 

[emily22]

hi, i dont think the loan can be paid later and i have already started up but have been planning to do loads of marketing etc to get me working full tie with it.
This pregnancy is my first priority - i thought id lost all chance of having another one so no matter what, this now comes first.

But i also want to try and continue with the buisness, i am mobile and work on my own so i have more flexibility as to when i work etc.

The loan repayments are only £20 a month for the 1st 6 months, then £29 for the remainder, so even when im not working i can still pay it.

My husband is as shocked as i am but hasnt taken it well, so ive got loads to sort out with him now, but at the end of the day he cant blame me for this. I know hes prob petrified for me after last time so this is gonna take time to settle in his mind, i almost died when i had my ectopic and am very lucky to be here, i guess he is just scared of it happeing again - and so am I.

We are keeping it to ourselves this time, only me best friend knows but thats as far as its gonna go until i reach 12 weeks. Im still shaking with shock, and as much as im scared im happy too. I just dont want to put everything on hold, last time i did that and then the worst happend. I think i need to carry on as normal but also plan to adapt things as i need to. Once i reach that 12 week point ill be ok, ill get an early scan at 6wks because of what happend before to ensure this isnt another ectopic, so ive only got another week - 2weeks to wait for that...

 

[PLAOH]

My mum's always telling me "where there's a will there's a way".:hug:

This pregnancy, naturally is your main priority, however, I can't see why you can't continue with your work and after the baby work on a part-time basis. Most of my ladies prefer an evening appointment as it leaves their day off free for them.

xx

 

[cups1974]

I say go for it!! Everything happens for a reason just make sure u take care of yourself first then the biz. Ck with your doctor and see what he/she says Good luck to you and many blessings!

 

[tinkywinky]

After reading your post I get the feeling you'd rather wait to the crucial 12 week stage. I think this is very wise.

If you can afford not to work and take it easy for this time then I'd say do so. It's very worrying having lost a baby and the pregnancy not working out once, I know have been there and you worry like mad during any subsequent pregnancies.

When I was 13 weeks pregnant we moved to a new area, so I lost all my clients from the old area.

I set up very very part time, and luckily got enough work to tide me over.

I still have my clients and a few more, but at the end of the day the baby and your help do come first.

A little bit of work won't harm if you take it easy and don't carry heavy things around. In fact it takes your mind off things I think.

If you are self employed and are paying your National Insurance Contributions you may get maternity pay.

Good luck with the pregnancy, try not to worry. Enjoy putting your feet up watching TV and having time to relax. It may be boring but I think it is essential in the beginning.

hth's x

 

[emily22]

hi thanks for your replies, Tinky Winky - you are so right about how im thinking right now. Im not even telling my mum until the 12 weeks has passed. Ive got an early scan hopefully the week after next and Im hoping that will ease some of my fears. Im trying to get straight in my head how im going to do things, but i did this last time and it all went wrong, once i know its going to be ok - then ill be happy to plan the future....

Thanks so much for your advice...:hug:

 

[leah82]

Just wanted to say "Congratulations"!!! Your body knows better than anyone else & will tell you if your doing to much & you must listen to it!! Take it easy for the first 3mths, then see how it goes!! Might give you something to focus on other than the pregnancy as it will distract from any worries you might have, as when I was pregnant both times I was so worried because of fertility problems, & so stressed that baby was going to be ok etc... on & off through the pregnancies!!
Just don't make things stressful, maybe people could come to you for a while, I'm sure they will be understanding!!! Good look with it all, I'm sure you'll decide whats right for you & bump!!! Keep us up to date!! :hug:

 

[blossom]

Congratulations and I hope all goes well with your pregnancy. :hug:

If it was me, I would shelve the business for now, loan or no loan. This baby is quite rightly the most important thing for you right now. You are setting out on a journey with this pregnancy and you need to give it everything.

Leave the business a bit . . . it's not just the pregnancy it's the birth and those precious early months . . . you can't in all fairness give all of yourself to both the baby and the business. JMHO.

If you want to succeed, you will. :hug:

 

[sj1973]

Congratulations and I hope all goes well with your pregnancy. :hug:

If it was me, I would shelve the business for now, loan or no loan. This baby is quite rightly the most important thing for you right now. You are setting out on a journey with this pregnancy and you need to give it everything.

Leave the business a bit . . . it's not just the pregnancy it's the birth and those precious early months . . . you can't in all fairness give all of yourself to both the baby and the business. JMHO.

If you want to succeed, you will. :hug:

same goes for me....dont put presure when you dont need it hun.....my sis had epotic pregnancy and had 1 tube taken away,she had another baby after and just took it easy for her pregnancy....which ever you decide good luck and congratulations again hun xxxx

 

[tinkywinky]

Take each day as it comes. When you've been through what you've been through, you don't want to put added pressure on yourself; for the first few weeks you are likely to have a few hormonal changes which can make you feel ill (morning sickness) so I'd say concentrate on you now business later. You probably won't feel like working anyway at the mo.

I made it work even though it was very part time and I couldn't really be bothered as I felt tired, fat and wobbly lol

But seriously I'm a firm believer in putting you first work second at a time like this.

 

[emily22]

hi, thanks again for all your support! I am definatl putting this pregnancy first but think im also going to carry on with the business but maybe not try to promote it too big just yet! I really need something to take my mind off things, once ive had my early scan ill be a little more relaxed but at the mo im spending everyday just paniking and almost waiting for things to go wrong. I know that sounds awful but I have 2 children already and never had any probs until last time, last time it was all planned, i got my positive result and was so excited but a week later it all started to fall apart. At first the docs thought I was / had a miscarriage but wern't 100% sure, almost 4 weeks later i had surgery for a ruptured ectopic. It was the most terrifying experience I had ever faced. I cant explain how i felt, it was kind of like someone came into my life and just smashed everything into tiny pieces.

I never thought something like that would ever happen to me but it did. And so now, as much as i want to be excited this time round I cant - not yet anyway. I need to keep going with the business to take my mind of it all and to give me something else to think about. Its hard, every little niggle i get worries me as this is once again that dreaded first week! I never made it past the first week last time without knowing for sure that something was wrong so i just want to get past this one with no obvious probs and that will be a good sign for me!

I have new client booked tommorow eve and have re-organized my things! I had a large carry bag for my table which is quite heavy, so ive now transferred that to a large suitcase with wheels! It doesnt look as great but at least i can pull it easily without having to lift it!

The rest of the week is busy 'ish' but mainly doing case studies for my nail extension course so nothing to heavy...

....saying that - can anyone just quickly reassure me that its ok to be working with acrylic whilst pregnant? Il be going onto fibreglass and gel after xmas at college..

Thanks again soooo much to all of you - it helps so much to ba able to 'talk' about this without anyone who knows me finding out my news sooner than id like them too! lol! :hug:

 

[tinkywinky]

Oh bless you I can firmly understand what you have been through and are going through now and I do think yes maybe a bit of work (and extra cash so you can go shopping lol) will help take your mind off things.

I had two beautiful healthy babies after a miscarriage which shattered my world, tore me apart and I still grieve for the lost baby now. I can remember every single thing about that miscarriage more than I can remember both labours, as it is a negative and upsetting and painful thing that happened and I never want to experience it again.

So your body is naturally nurturing your baby whilst your mind is in fear.

I can totally understand and sympathise lovey.

It sounds like you are going through all I can describe as mental torture and worry the baby is born and placed into your arms.


It's so hard when you've had such a life shattering experience to try and pick yourself up and be positive.

I think as far as statistics go it is rare to experience what you have been through again and hopefully there is little chance of this happening again.

Did you speak to your doc/midwife - they are always there if you have concerns and worries about your little one.

Anyway I think you are sensible, listen to your body and your mind. Your intuition will tell you to put things on hold.

In terms of nails have you checked with your midwife about doing acrylic if you do do it, I decided not to in the end but that's personal to everyone I suppose.

PM me if you want to chat x x

 

[emily22]

hi, thanks tinkywinky!

I haven't seen a midwife yet, Ive got to go to the GP tommorow so he can get me booked in for the early scan at the EPU. I dont offer acrylic as part of my biz yet, but I am doing it a college at the mo - whats your opinion on working with it when pregnant? I wanted to ask my tutor last night but cant as she knows my mother (who doesnt know about all this yet!!). I did put on the extractor fan in the room though as they dont normally bother to put it on, so Im going to make sure its on all the time now.

I was asked by a couple of the girls at college if i wanted to join them for a 'wine' evening - I stupidly said i dont drink and was responded to with 'I know you do because I saw you hanging a while ago after you'd been out the noght before'! I continued my excuse with saying I have decided not to drink anymore because of that night but said id still love to join them just wont drink alcohol! I felt like such an idiot, what could i say??! I think ill just have to lie a bit more and say ive got tummy trouble at the mo and cant drink because of it!!
- I didnt think about what to say when it comes to going out for a drink but have def got to come up with a better excuse lol!

 

[Vetty]

- I didnt think about what to say when it comes to going out for a drink but have def got to come up with a better excuse lol!

Being on antibiotics is always a good one - especially dental ones cos they make you quite literally vomit if you drink alcohol on them...... Plus, no-one can look at you and say haven't got toothache!

Btw, there are no risk associated with working with l+p as long as you are sensible about vapours which you should be anyway.....

Good luck, fingers crossed for you xx

 

[tinkywinky]

As Vetty says there are no associated risks with L & P but I chose not to do it. Perhaps because I was looking for an excuse not to do enhancements anymore cos I didn't enjoy doing them.

 

[emily22]

Hiya, I had my early scan today and little bean is where it should be this time. Ive got to have another one in 2 weeks as i am a little too early to see the heartbeat - but thats not worrying me at all as i know that often happens with early scans.

Im just sooooo relieved that this one is in the right place!!:green::green::green:

 

[VICKYBROOKES]

aww bless im so pleased for u hun i know how worrying it can be at this stage but thats great that its where its suposed to be !! congrats to u !!! let us know how the next scan goes to ! also hows the beauty side of things going for u hun ? im a mum of an 18 month old girl and im training at the mo and like to read about how other tecs and therapists get on in business juggling it around kids/pregnancy . im hoping to have another next year maybe . we will have to see !!lol

 

[sj1973]

Hiya, I had my early scan today and little bean is where it should be this time. Ive got to have another one in 2 weeks as i am a little too early to see the heartbeat - but thats not worrying me at all as i know that often happens with early scans.

Im just sooooo relieved that this one is in the right place!!:green::green::green:

pleased for you huni and little bundle of joy,hope you dont suffer toooo much pain in your pregnancy....my 1st was a breeze .....only a bump.....my 2nd was a pain ,she could not wait to get out!!.....xxx

 

[saspeterson]

Good Luck with it all dear. I hope that all goes well for you. I have had 4 successful pregnancies after I was told that I wouldnt be able to have any! I would like to wish you all the best for you and your baby.

Good luck, cant wait to hear of the happy end result for you:Love: