Lily
Well-Known Member
Teena_B said:
God my spellings rubbish!!!! LOL
So it did make sense what i was saying LOL
These are just my personal opinions from my life so far!!!!!!!
Amanda
What is a healthy weight and how do you maintain it?
- Thread starter PLAOH
- Start date
Help Support SalonGeek:
God my spellings rubbish!!!! LOL
So it did make sense what i was saying LOL
These are just my personal opinions from my life so far!!!!!!!
Amanda
Lily
Well-Known Member
plaoh said:Hi Amanda,
Thank you for the pm and for your honest answer.
I do agree with you concerning the celebs and magazines. There is too much pressure to be "perfect" like the pictures and if I could be airbrushedI too could look that good. When we went shopping for my daughters Communion dress, she chose a dress that has capped sleeves. Her response to the dress with thin straps was " i don't like my shoulders being shown, they are too skinny and white"
Your comments have been helpful as I'm swaying more to healthy as opposed to slimmer. For my health I need to lose weight. My knees hurt when i get up off the floor. I couldn't genuflect in church last week (utter embarrassment) and I can't run with my children. I have never eaten particularly healthy, but before I met hubby never had to worry. Now I don't always get time to eat when I need to so then tend to hit a sugary fix when I feel faint. Then once I get that hungery and start eating the sugary things, I find the binge is in full swing.
I have tried Sw some years ago and I did lose weight. I think in order for me to succeed, my family needs to look at eating habit.
Deffo, its a life changing experience, i wanted to loose weight for my wedding so i followed the plan and so did Herman and my kids and we even had curries and desserts (they didnt know and i didnt tell them). Its changing the way you cook things and in what sauces........as far as excerise, i for example when dusting or cleaning windows try to do it a little more vigourisly (spellings????) this is excersing without having to go the gym etc!!!!
Another example is my 10 yr old step daughter will not eat fruit or veg, she never has even as a baby and is always sat at the pc.........wheras my 13 yr old step daughter and 6 yr old daughter eat any fruit and veg and are really active!!!!!!!
Amanda
PLAOH
jog jog jogging
*Jo* said:Hi Lou,
Yea I do know where you are coming from ... I am about 5 stone overweight and i hate it! It does dictate everything you do in life everyday and like you i love the sun but dread it also coz it means hunting for something to wear that i dont look hideous in. My confidence has hit rock bottom and i think in my nails too coz i so want to interact with others but just think they will see what i do - fat and old! I have booked to do a day next week with other people and am really excited but really scared too coz of what i will look like compared to everyone else.
Lou I dont have the answers ( i have even thought about surgery) I have slimmed using slimming pills for years and they have left me in a mess physically and mentally so dont go down that route please.
The only way is too eat less and more healthy and excercise more - i think we all know that lol - but you definately have to be in the right mindset and that is the hardest part. I think I start a diet every week lol but knowing that i am going to fail so I guess thats why i always do. My mum used to tell me that I could set my mind to do or get anything i wanted (i so love a challenge) and I always succeeded - except in losing weight - didnt make sense coz it costs nought, infact costs a damn site less than what i eat lol
Anyways i am not going to go on anymore
Take care xxx
PS Debs you always come over a beautiful confident lady on here and your piccy is lovely
Snap! Whenever I mention losing weight my hubby reminds me that I never see anything through. So every time I try I've already failed as I don't believe I can do it.
At least it's clear now, healthy food and the right time and it will happen.
Goodluck with your training day. :hug:
This is so amazing to read. I am overweight by about 5 stones and I have always been on this site imagining that all the other geeks were young, slim size 10/12 girls and I am this fat 53 year old. This has opened my eyes a lot I can tell you. I always think that everyone else it super brilliant at nails (and Im not) young and beautiful (and Im not) and slim (not yet again). Just goes to show doesn't it.
The best thing that has happened to me is meeting my new hubby 4 years ago. He has only ever known me big, yet he loves the socks off me, and has taught me to love myself 'just as I am'. I remember the first time he told me he loved me....... I was going round for weeks thinking......he loves me 'just as I am'. Very Bridget Jones I know, but it was the start of learning to love myself JUST AS I AM.
The best thing that has happened to me is meeting my new hubby 4 years ago. He has only ever known me big, yet he loves the socks off me, and has taught me to love myself 'just as I am'. I remember the first time he told me he loved me....... I was going round for weeks thinking......he loves me 'just as I am'. Very Bridget Jones I know, but it was the start of learning to love myself JUST AS I AM.
Lily
Well-Known Member
valburt said:
Awh thats so inspirational, it doesnt matter what shape you are!!!! Love yourself first!!!!!! the rest follows.
Amanda xxx
nik
too geeky for my own good
hiya
i have also tried every diet going and have several stones to lose.
At the moment i am trying the paul mckenna book and cd, the idea is to teach you to like yourself and respond to food as a slim person does. I thought if i could sort out my mind first it might be easier. The problem with diets is they make you focus on food constantly which is unhealthy.
i have also tried every diet going and have several stones to lose.
At the moment i am trying the paul mckenna book and cd, the idea is to teach you to like yourself and respond to food as a slim person does. I thought if i could sort out my mind first it might be easier. The problem with diets is they make you focus on food constantly which is unhealthy.
PLAOH
jog jog jogging
nik said:
Hi Nikki,
I've also got the book and cd (along with every other self help weight loss book :lol: :lol: ). but haven't used it yet.
Let us know how you get on with it and if indeed it works. I'm open to any suggestions.
valburt said:
Re the bold section - this is one of my problems, I feel guilty that my husband knew me as a 16 year old 8 1/2 stone young thing, I do think I was quite attractive, and now he has to put up with this fat, ageing flump, who feels so unsexy that I don't want him to see me naked. It's really depressing. You are so lucky to know that your man loves you as you are!
PS I also thought the other geeks were as you described, young sexy, brilliant at nails!
Bryony
British Aussie Geek
plaoh said:
Ok, that's me then. The only 'problem' I have with my weight is not enough of it. I was teased constantly throughout school as I was always so thin - I ate like a horse though! (Bitch, I know!)
Anyway, as I got older, about 16/17 I noticed that I couldn't eat what I liked and stay thin. My mum used to be thinner than me, and she is now a size 20. I don't want to go the same way so I am careful about what I eat but I DON'T diet!
I eat reasonably healthy (and I eat big meals), I generally don't eat: cakes, biscuits, sweets, chocolate, puddings, pastry, pies, burgers, chips. I aviod those aisles in the supermarket, otherwise I know I'd buy it all. I eat mostly chicken, a little pork, use lean mince (when I use it). I spread butter thinly (but more beacuse I don't like the taste when it's thick - yeugh). I mainly cook from scrtach - i.e don't buy ready meals, I maybe use a prepared sauce one a week/ fortnight, I have takeaway once or twice a month at most. I make mountains of veg so my plate is FULL. I also excercise about twice a week and have an active job too. I don't eat between meals, I have recently started to eat breakfast, but didn't for years, I have a sandwich for lunch and dinner when I get home - which on the whole I try not to cook/ eat too late in the evening. I don't drink tea, coffee (don't like caffiene), coke (yeugh) or other fizzy drinks (only VERY occasionally).
I carry a bottle of water with me for work & in the car, whenever I feel hungry I drink some water - you'll be amazed how often hunger is actually not hunger but dehydration!!!!
I drink too much, when I want a piece of cake (not often, I'd rather fill up on dinner than pudding) I eat it and enjoy it and don;t feel guilty. If I go away for a weekend and want to pig out I can, but get back to normal afterwards.
I don't own a set of scales. I judge my overindulgences by how well my clothes fit (or not!).
Anyway, you asked what people thought was 'ideal weight'. I think this is up to what YOU feel comfortable with. I am actually about 1 1/2 stone underweight, but know I wouldn't feel comfortable if I was at the weight I should be for my height. I'm not so underweight my health is at risk. As long as you are at a healthy weight for your height and YOU feel good, it doesn't matter what the scales say.
Life is NOT a bed of roses when you are slim. People still take the piss, clothes look crap as there is nothing to hang off, you still don't have enough money, nice house, reliable car etc. etc.
Sorry for long winded post - but you did ask!
geeg
Judge Gigi-Honorary Geek
Well it's late and this post and Plaoe's plight (so like my own) have made me want to 'spill my guts' , as they say so elegantly in the USA, to anyone who wants to listen.
I am 57 years old. For the past 15 years I have gradually put on weight to the point where I was approx. twice the weight that I used to be. To those of you who think I am so confident ... forget it ... I felt exactly like Plaoe ... exactly. Though successful and hardworking in my professional life I have felt an utter failure when it came to solving this problem. Why should it be so hard to control what I put in my mouth? I'm good at most everything I put my mind to so why not this? I've done the diets (all of them) but could never sustain the enthusiasm or the will for as long as it was going to take to get the weight off ... why not? Why couldn't I eat like other people without putting on weight? I was angry. I didn't over eat and I eat very healthy food ... nothing processed and all fresh cooked .. plenty of veg fruit and protein and sometimes too much carbohydrate but that's normal isn't it?
5 Months ago now, I had a bariatric bypass. Here is what my most excellent doctor told me. Calories in has to equal calories out or you will gain weight. simple. Trouble is my calories in and the size of my meals (although normal to most) were 3 times more than I needed because I don't exercise (well who does when they are so overweight and it is uncomfortable?). Basically I can live off thin air. "Of course you couldn't do it on your own," he said. "You would always feel hungry and dissatisfied and give up a diet in just plain anger". He was so right.
5 months on and I have lost 28 kilos (approx 60lbs). I feel totally full on very little food and therefore am not ever hungry. I CAN'T eat more than a certain amount or I would feel very uncomfortable. I have been an excellent patient. Never had to vomit and only been in pain once. I had keyhole surgery and was home feeling great within 10 days. I was never actually in any pain ... a little uncomfortable but not what anyone would describe as pain.
I no longer feel a failure because now I know that I NEEDED this and my weight gain was not through gluttony. My only regret is that I did not have this operation 10 years ago. I had always been shapely, feminine, never a skinny mini ... never had a weight problem, but the sedentary nature of our job does not help the situation. I hid behind my nail desk for years .. it was comfortable.
To those of you with a REAL weight problem ... DO IT. You will not regret it ever. I am emerging again ... seeing me again ... feeling bones I forgot I had .. moving again ... going to the gym (reluctantly) but feeling better for it. I truly felt disabled and was disabled with the weight. It was no way to live ... I wasn't living. I was hating life and myself. DO IT. If you have to re mortgage the house DO IT. I paid for my operation myself. 15,000.00!! Yes, that is the price I paid to be me again.
End of story
I am 57 years old. For the past 15 years I have gradually put on weight to the point where I was approx. twice the weight that I used to be. To those of you who think I am so confident ... forget it ... I felt exactly like Plaoe ... exactly. Though successful and hardworking in my professional life I have felt an utter failure when it came to solving this problem. Why should it be so hard to control what I put in my mouth? I'm good at most everything I put my mind to so why not this? I've done the diets (all of them) but could never sustain the enthusiasm or the will for as long as it was going to take to get the weight off ... why not? Why couldn't I eat like other people without putting on weight? I was angry. I didn't over eat and I eat very healthy food ... nothing processed and all fresh cooked .. plenty of veg fruit and protein and sometimes too much carbohydrate but that's normal isn't it?
5 Months ago now, I had a bariatric bypass. Here is what my most excellent doctor told me. Calories in has to equal calories out or you will gain weight. simple. Trouble is my calories in and the size of my meals (although normal to most) were 3 times more than I needed because I don't exercise (well who does when they are so overweight and it is uncomfortable?). Basically I can live off thin air. "Of course you couldn't do it on your own," he said. "You would always feel hungry and dissatisfied and give up a diet in just plain anger". He was so right.
5 months on and I have lost 28 kilos (approx 60lbs). I feel totally full on very little food and therefore am not ever hungry. I CAN'T eat more than a certain amount or I would feel very uncomfortable. I have been an excellent patient. Never had to vomit and only been in pain once. I had keyhole surgery and was home feeling great within 10 days. I was never actually in any pain ... a little uncomfortable but not what anyone would describe as pain.
I no longer feel a failure because now I know that I NEEDED this and my weight gain was not through gluttony. My only regret is that I did not have this operation 10 years ago. I had always been shapely, feminine, never a skinny mini ... never had a weight problem, but the sedentary nature of our job does not help the situation. I hid behind my nail desk for years .. it was comfortable.
To those of you with a REAL weight problem ... DO IT. You will not regret it ever. I am emerging again ... seeing me again ... feeling bones I forgot I had .. moving again ... going to the gym (reluctantly) but feeling better for it. I truly felt disabled and was disabled with the weight. It was no way to live ... I wasn't living. I was hating life and myself. DO IT. If you have to re mortgage the house DO IT. I paid for my operation myself. 15,000.00!! Yes, that is the price I paid to be me again.
End of story
Just Jo
Creative Geek :)
Incredible Geeg! and there was I and probably most of us thinking you were the most amazing and confident woman. It just goes to show. Thankyou Gigi for sharing that :hug: you are so truly an inspiration in so many ways already and now one more is added to the list.
This is something that I have thought about and still am - I really will seriously look into it now because you have made me see it differently - I was even feeling a failure for thinking of surgery because I was so convinced I would fail at that too
Anyway - Thankyou for sharing :hug: xxx
This is something that I have thought about and still am - I really will seriously look into it now because you have made me see it differently - I was even feeling a failure for thinking of surgery because I was so convinced I would fail at that too
Anyway - Thankyou for sharing :hug: xxx
GlitzyGirl
Well-Known Member
valburt said:
I know exactly what you mean Val.
Recently I've been thinking, I must be the only overweight nail technician there is. In every salon you look in, you see a beautiful, slim, young thing sitting behind her nail desk. This does'nt do a lot for your confidence. But reading this thread, I realised I am not on my own. However, still does'nt comfort me a lot, when I am so desperate to be slimmer. I am not looking to be a size 10 or anything, I'd just like to be a lot more comfortable in my clothing, and to know that I look decent without having to cover everything up. It's come to the stage where I don't even want summer to be here, as I'll have to at least bare my arms.
When other people look at me, they see a "happy and fun loving" person. But when I look in the mirror, all I see is this "blob" and often find myself saying "I hate you" into the mirror. There are sometimes I do like myself, but these days it's getting rarer.
I have tried all different diets, and failed. Except for once, when something just clicked in my brain and I did it. I was very happy then and very confident, but it did'nt last long. I fell pregnant. Since then I've been waiting for that click again, but it has'nt happened yet.
I've now got the Paul McKenna book and CD, and sent off for detox tablets. I've just gotta start reading the book, if I get the time.
Anyway, enough of the story of my life.
By the way Geeg, what is bariatric bypass, is it same as gastric bypass?
Thanks
PLAOH
jog jog jogging
Sorry for long winded post - but you did ask![/QUOTE]
Hi Bryony,
Long winded posts are fine cause yes, :biggrin: I did ask and I appreciate your honesty.
Before we moved to Suffolk, although I didn't do much exercise I did still have the school run. Now the school is too far away, (the children's legs would grind away if we walked ), so it's in the car and as Geek pointed out, sitting behind a desk doing a job I love, doesn't help either.
It is no wonder that I struggle to lose any, I'm just not moving.
I don't drink enough water either, far too much caffeine.
I know being slim doesn't make life perfect. I just want to wake up in the morning WITHOUT that feeling that the day will be a struggle before it's begun.
Louise x
Hi Bryony,
Long winded posts are fine cause yes, :biggrin: I did ask and I appreciate your honesty.
Before we moved to Suffolk, although I didn't do much exercise I did still have the school run. Now the school is too far away, (the children's legs would grind away if we walked
), so it's in the car and as Geek pointed out, sitting behind a desk doing a job I love, doesn't help either.It is no wonder that I struggle to lose any, I'm just not moving.
I don't drink enough water either, far too much caffeine.
I know being slim doesn't make life perfect. I just want to wake up in the morning WITHOUT that feeling that the day will be a struggle before it's begun.
Louise x
wobbly
Well-Known Member
AT 6 stone overweight, I have the same probs as a lot of you here, but last year after having counselling at the eating disorders unit, I told my friends just how unhappy and depressed i was.
They were all totally shocked!!
I had basically created a 'new me' which i could hide behind, i was large and larger than life, you know 'the big bubbly one with the gift of the gab.'
None of my friends knew how i could go through the cupboard like a whirlwind and not just eat some biscuits , but could eat several packets and anything else i could eat very quickly.
Afterwards i would be filled with huge feelings of self loathing so i would make myself sick.
No one noticed for years because i didnt do it all the time, only if i felt low or was really unhappy.
My hubby heard me one night and was really upset because i hadnt confided in him about it. It was at that point that i decided to get some help.
It was the best thing I did, i now know that there are other ways of dealing with problems and not to use food as a crutch.
If you have any feelings like this, go and see your doctor or a counsellor, cos a lot of it isnt just to do with food, its emotional stuff too!!
Sorry for such a long post
Tina x
They were all totally shocked!!
I had basically created a 'new me' which i could hide behind, i was large and larger than life, you know 'the big bubbly one with the gift of the gab.'
None of my friends knew how i could go through the cupboard like a whirlwind and not just eat some biscuits , but could eat several packets and anything else i could eat very quickly.
Afterwards i would be filled with huge feelings of self loathing so i would make myself sick.
No one noticed for years because i didnt do it all the time, only if i felt low or was really unhappy.
My hubby heard me one night and was really upset because i hadnt confided in him about it. It was at that point that i decided to get some help.
It was the best thing I did, i now know that there are other ways of dealing with problems and not to use food as a crutch.
If you have any feelings like this, go and see your doctor or a counsellor, cos a lot of it isnt just to do with food, its emotional stuff too!!
Sorry for such a long post
Tina x
Newgirl
Well-Known Member
Hi everyone,
This time 9 weeks ago, I joined slimming world (reluctantly) I had been four years previously and only managed to loose 5lbs in 9months:o I now know that I didn't understand the programme and the leader just didn't get me inspired.
:biggrin: This time I have been very lucky I go along with a great mate who is also having success we have both lost just over a stone each. I put our success down to the fact that we have joined a great group. We all have good laugh and can be honest about food and our 'issues'.
Okay it hasnt happened overnight but we are both getting to our goal. It isnt easy you have to devote time and effort in reading up about food and planning ahead but I have found that the days that I plan I am more satisfied and am less likely to blow it.
Hope you find what is right for you.
BTW I havent set myself an unrealistc goal weight (which I think helps) and we've made lots of new friends.
This time 9 weeks ago, I joined slimming world (reluctantly) I had been four years previously and only managed to loose 5lbs in 9months:o I now know that I didn't understand the programme and the leader just didn't get me inspired.
:biggrin: This time I have been very lucky I go along with a great mate who is also having success we have both lost just over a stone each. I put our success down to the fact that we have joined a great group. We all have good laugh and can be honest about food and our 'issues'.
Okay it hasnt happened overnight but we are both getting to our goal. It isnt easy you have to devote time and effort in reading up about food and planning ahead but I have found that the days that I plan I am more satisfied and am less likely to blow it.
Hope you find what is right for you.
BTW I havent set myself an unrealistc goal weight (which I think helps) and we've made lots of new friends.
Geeg
I have to say, I'm shocked by your post. As you said, I thought you were this amazing person, confident in everything, good at everything, etc etc. I also didn't see you as overweight. In my mind's eye you were maybe 1 stone over weight at the most, power dressing, with people running around for you, "yes, maam, no, maam" type of thing!
I also have to say, those pictures of you in the new Creative training booklet, you look fantastic!
After your post, I now see you more as a normal person (whatever that is!), basically, someone who would talk to me, not look over me (I hope you know what I mean, this is a confidence issue, I'm sure, that I feel people are too good to talk to me, how sad is that!?) but treat me as more of an equal (except that I am a million miles away from being as good as you and knowledgeable as you at nails!
Does anyone else have this type of confidence problem, where they feel they are not good enough for certain people to talk to? At the trade shows, I tend to walk around with my head low, thinking that everyone around me is better than me, knows more, and doesn't have the time to spend on someone like me.
I have to say, I'm shocked by your post. As you said, I thought you were this amazing person, confident in everything, good at everything, etc etc. I also didn't see you as overweight. In my mind's eye you were maybe 1 stone over weight at the most, power dressing, with people running around for you, "yes, maam, no, maam" type of thing!
I also have to say, those pictures of you in the new Creative training booklet, you look fantastic!
After your post, I now see you more as a normal person (whatever that is!), basically, someone who would talk to me, not look over me (I hope you know what I mean, this is a confidence issue, I'm sure, that I feel people are too good to talk to me, how sad is that!?) but treat me as more of an equal (except that I am a million miles away from being as good as you and knowledgeable as you at nails!
Does anyone else have this type of confidence problem, where they feel they are not good enough for certain people to talk to? At the trade shows, I tend to walk around with my head low, thinking that everyone around me is better than me, knows more, and doesn't have the time to spend on someone like me.
I'd also like to say, I think that you can be very affected by your weight, whether you are 15 stone overweight, or 1 stone overweight. I think it's about perception of yourself. I am actually only a size 16 (pushing 18 and very upset about it) but I think lots of pressure from magazines, the media, etc, has made me feel very ugly. In my office there is a woman who is, when I really look, noticeably much bigger than me, but in my mind there is no difference between us, I am so affected by being overweight. This other woman is a lovely person, I don't see her as big unless I think about it, she's just Carol (name changed to protect the innocent!). You really have to wonder, how do other people see us? You cannot say what is in others' mind's eye.
I've just picked up a copy of Best magazine from the kitchen at work, in which Caroline Quentin says how she doesn't have an issue with her weight, she's totally happy with her looks. GOD, HOW WONDERFUL IT WOULD BE TO BE LIKE THAT! I've decided to "borrow" that article and take it home, as an inspiration. I think she's a very beautiful woman.
I've just picked up a copy of Best magazine from the kitchen at work, in which Caroline Quentin says how she doesn't have an issue with her weight, she's totally happy with her looks. GOD, HOW WONDERFUL IT WOULD BE TO BE LIKE THAT! I've decided to "borrow" that article and take it home, as an inspiration. I think she's a very beautiful woman.
Just Jo
Creative Geek :)
Teena I wholeheartedly agree
I definately walk into somewhere head down first and speak all apologetically because like you see myself as unworthy. and you are right - that is sad!!
I think the weight is just part of that though and maybe we need to revise the whole picture - whatever that means.
One thing I know is that I have always felt fat and looked fat to me when i looked in a mirror, right back from being a child - but when I see photos of me I wasnt fat!! Now I look how I have always felt - scarey!!
This is really scarey to even type this - I have an absolute phobia of death - not just being afraid but the whole panic attack, not going out the door for months, not being able to read a paper or watch the news or even speak about death without crying and shaking kind and have sufferred like this (in varying degrees) for 22 years!! I have finally been to see someone who has diagnosed this as an actual condition and I am goign to get help - but this condition has happened because of something underlying and I guess i will find this out.
With this and my weight I feel only part living and can't bear the next whatever years feeling the same so I really am going to do something about it - because I want to and not just because someone else is pressuring me to do it either.
EEks I have never bared my soul this much - I really will need to keep my head down now when I see anyone lol
:hug: :hug: to all xxx
Bryony
British Aussie Geek
I totally agree, I think we judge ourselves much more harshly than we do others. We look for the good in other people but can find it very difficult to focus on our own good points.Teena_B said:
I think you've answered your own question, I think you'd be surprised how many people just see you as Teena.Teena_B said:
Lily said:
i also like the slimming world diet
i did do the atkins diet for 4 weeks (lost 1 stone in the first 2 weeks tho) but then i got sick of the sight of bacon and sausage
i started with slimming world on wednesday, all im eating now is fruit and veg with a couple of healthy optiions, and i LOVE IT, eat all day long, non stop, AND STILL LOSE WEIGHT, what more could a gal ask for, ive only got about 9 more pounds to lose and i cant weight for the summer to come to i can show it off, ive even bought that dvd - davina power of 3 - tho im not starting that till monday - hey - its the weekend - time for using up all my syns
