What's your fave corny Christmas cracker joke??

[cath4512]

Ok,its time for all the corny christmas jokes to come out. Whats your fave???

Mine is:- What is Santa's favourite pizza? .............one thats deep pan, crisp & even

how bad is that?? have you got a worse one??

 

[HWilliams]

Why did the biscuit cry?
Because his parents had been a wafer so long.

 

[HWilliams]

Why didn't the skeleton go to the Christmas Ball?
He had nobody to go with...

 

[Princess Mummy]

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals ? Philippe Phillop.

:lol:

 

[Francesca<3]

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef

 

[Noodle]

What do you get if you throw a piano down a mineshaft?

A flat miner !

 

[emma@TheLaurel]

What's pink and hard? &#128563;

A pig with a flick knife. &#128516;

 

[HWilliams]

What do you call a donkey with 3 legs?

A wonkey

 

[HWilliams]

What do you get if you cross a pig with a T-Rex?

Jurassic Pork

 

[dandelionpoppy]

What do you call a donkey with 3 legs?

A wonkey

Ha-ha! Fell out of my cot laughing last time I heard that!:lol:

Hope you're not peaking early....save a few for 17th! xxx

 

[HWilliams]

Ha-ha! Fell out of my cot laughing last time I heard that!:lol:

Hope you're not peaking early....save a few for 17th! xxx

Got some great ones for next week x

 

[HWilliams]

How do Eskimos build their houses?

With Ig-glue!!!

 

[Gemgem675]

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals ? Philippe Phillop.

:lol:

I remember hearing this on the radio once its a terrible joke but i couldn't stop laughing:o

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas Quacker!

 

[x Fee x]

Oooh- I got one at lunch just yesterday:

What's a prizefighter's favorite drink?

-Punch

LMAO!!! it's not even funny, but the wine had me giggling for ages lol

 

[HWilliams]

Why did the condom fly round at 80mph?

Cos it was p....ed off!

:-0

 

[lilly]

What do you call a woman with a mixer on her head ???? Blender ! :smack:

 

[Lola_Spa]

Two tomatoes cross the road, one gets run over.

The other Tomatoe shouts "ketch-up"

Haha it's funny when an American says it. (omg lame joke award goes to me!!)

Xxx

 

[Lola_Spa]

That's *tomato lol xx

 

[Astarstyle]

Q. What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A. A fsh!

Never fails to make me laugh!! :lol:

 

[iconic]

Q. What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A. A fsh!

Never fails to make me laugh!! :lol:

Ha ha, this is the joke that always comes first in to my head when I think of jokes!! Never fails to make me laugh either!!

Another one though..

Q. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A. No idea!

Lol.. Oh dear me!! Xx