no!
Would you forgive a cheater?
- Thread starter PixieBeauty
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In answer to your question no I would not because I am the type of person that would not be able to get past that and would constantly think about it analysing it and so the relationship would have no chance.
My opinion though is based on how I would feel but I do understand why people may forgive someone. I also believe that a woman who cheats normally only does so if there is truly something wrong in the relationship whereas a man can be happy in a relationship and still cheat. That's men fir you and I'm afraid even the nicest man can cheat given the right circumstances! Sorry but it's true. :-/
When I was single I can't tell you the amount of men who came on to me/ talked in an inappropriate manner to me on facebook who were married or in relationships! Some were the type you would think would not do that type of thing! So you seriously have to be mindful of the fact that given the chance and the excuse a man will betray you, even if he loves you.
This is the thing with men they really are ruled by their d***s! To fool yourself into thinking any differently in my opinion is foolish. Just make sure you dont give them the excuse/opportunity to get up to anything! Lol.
Sorry to be cynical!
My opinion though is based on how I would feel but I do understand why people may forgive someone. I also believe that a woman who cheats normally only does so if there is truly something wrong in the relationship whereas a man can be happy in a relationship and still cheat. That's men fir you and I'm afraid even the nicest man can cheat given the right circumstances! Sorry but it's true. :-/
When I was single I can't tell you the amount of men who came on to me/ talked in an inappropriate manner to me on facebook who were married or in relationships! Some were the type you would think would not do that type of thing! So you seriously have to be mindful of the fact that given the chance and the excuse a man will betray you, even if he loves you.
This is the thing with men they really are ruled by their d***s! To fool yourself into thinking any differently in my opinion is foolish. Just make sure you dont give them the excuse/opportunity to get up to anything! Lol.
Sorry to be cynical!
abiloveit
Well-Known Member
I found out my baby's dad had cheated on me 2 weeks after she was born, she 6 months now and it's been hell... Literally. My daughter is a battery baby, an angel but my life with him is awful... We try to work things out but I'm paranoid freak, I always think he's up to no good, it's not healthy! I would do anything to be free but it's soooo hard! I need a kickup the arse to get rid but find it hard with the little one! :-( cxx
What do we mean by cheating in this context?? A kiss, a cheating heart or a full blown affair?
It's easy to say no way... But if you just got married and your husband cheated would you divorce him straight away? It's not so simple once you've signed that piece of paper... X
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It's easy to say no way... But if you just got married and your husband cheated would you divorce him straight away? It's not so simple once you've signed that piece of paper... X
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KateeLouise
Well-Known Member
My partner and I been together 6years from age of 15 I am now turning 21 he is 23, I get very parnoid about my partner, he used to go on other girls Facebook and look at there pictures with there bums and boobs out so got really jealous, u don't think he has ever cheated on me but when I am not with him like on a girls night out and he is on a lads night out I feel sick to my stomach thinking he is with girls and cheating I have asked him and he said no , I guess it's just me been a weirdo as my exs cheated on me and think my current will, think am just been daft but if you got any tips or anything let me know lol xx
suzysuz
Active Member
im kinda going through this now, not so much thinking he is cheating but is hiding something. Some of you have probs seen my threard and i am going to try and get to the bottom of it.
Im 98% sure that im right and if i am. I will not forgive or forget. I will leave him, even if it will feel like the hardest thing ever i will know its right
Im 98% sure that im right and if i am. I will not forgive or forget. I will leave him, even if it will feel like the hardest thing ever i will know its right
Kateelouise the only tip u can give you is tell him straight how you feel. It's not acceptable for him to be looking through pics of girls in fb and liking them with there boobs and bums out! It's totally disrespectful but we are made to feel that we can't say it bothers us cos "it's just men being men!"
Well u for one refuse to just let things go that bother me just because society dictates that men can do what they like and we should put up with it!
I completely understand how it must make you feel and honestly facebook is the worst thing for a relationship. I'm lucky that my boyfriend no longer has a facebook account and so I don't have to worry about that.
The problem is if you don't tell him how you feel about things it festers and that's not good. Men are not stupid enough to think we would be ok with certain behaviours (ie. Rifling thru half naked pics on fb and "liking" them) but they more than likely have never been put in their place andvpulled up on it as most girls don't say anything.
Anyway it's hard to give advice as I don't know him or how he might react to you saying something. Why don't you go thru "liking" half naked pics of men on fb in front of him and see what he says to that?! Give him a taste of his own medicine and see how pissed off he gets! If nothingc else it'll make u feel a bit better! Lol.
Well u for one refuse to just let things go that bother me just because society dictates that men can do what they like and we should put up with it!
I completely understand how it must make you feel and honestly facebook is the worst thing for a relationship. I'm lucky that my boyfriend no longer has a facebook account and so I don't have to worry about that.
The problem is if you don't tell him how you feel about things it festers and that's not good. Men are not stupid enough to think we would be ok with certain behaviours (ie. Rifling thru half naked pics on fb and "liking" them) but they more than likely have never been put in their place andvpulled up on it as most girls don't say anything.
Anyway it's hard to give advice as I don't know him or how he might react to you saying something. Why don't you go thru "liking" half naked pics of men on fb in front of him and see what he says to that?! Give him a taste of his own medicine and see how pissed off he gets! If nothingc else it'll make u feel a bit better! Lol.
enlivenbylouise
Well-Known Member
Have forgiven in the past but just like OP I found someone who wouldn't dream of ever cheating on me and it's such a liberating feeling being able to say that you trust someone 100% (and mean it of course) and them feeling the same about you. X
Misslady to me cheating is cheating in any context. But i used to be more forgiving. As I've got older and experienced life a bit more I've become more opinionated! Lol.
A piece of paper would not make it harder for me to walk away from if someone disrespected me by cheating. Even if I could forgive I'd never forget so that would be it!
I do understand why some people take someone back who cheats but ultimately the signal that sends is that they can do what they want. That's why majority of men that cheat will do it again if they are let away with it the first time.
A piece of paper would not make it harder for me to walk away from if someone disrespected me by cheating. Even if I could forgive I'd never forget so that would be it!
I do understand why some people take someone back who cheats but ultimately the signal that sends is that they can do what they want. That's why majority of men that cheat will do it again if they are let away with it the first time.
sarah_clancy
Well-Known Member
There is usually a reason why people cheat..... Something is obviously lacking in the relationship if a man/woman feels the need to find it elsewhere.
That is also what I think but I just wanted to clarify because some people seem to have different degrees of what they'd put up with. And I know of a lot of older women that have put up with cheating husbands - simply because it's easier than leaving especially when children are involved.
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facelashbrow
Well-Known Member
I think its unfair to say, simply because its easier. There's nothing simple about it, but when you know its splitting up a family and how upset your children would be, sometimes you assess circumstances etc. I don't think I could ever get over it, but Im just saying its so permanent once you've left and you've changed your childrens lives. Ky husband.hasnt cheated and I don't think I could stay with him if he did, but when we've had bad patches the thought of leaving devastates me because of our child, so its definitely made us work harder when we may have given up. Digressing from cheating, but I'm just saying its not fair to say women stay because its "easy".
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Sorry I didn't mean 'easier' like that, I do understand where you are coming from. I meant in terms of all of the possible circumstances it's easier to stay for the kids or finances. But with regards to this, I am talking about a completely different generation and maybe even a different culture as lots of my family are abroad. Discussing things like this with older relatives really shocks me because a lot of the women knew what was going on (or still is) but just turn a blind eye.
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But to answer the OP... (sorry for digressing - i've had a think)
I do believe in forgiveness and can say that I could only forgive once and only once. But it's something that I would have to pray long and hard about cos I am like an elephant, and an elephant never forgets!
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I do believe in forgiveness and can say that I could only forgive once and only once. But it's something that I would have to pray long and hard about cos I am like an elephant, and an elephant never forgets!
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Pinkbunny28
Well-Known Member
I agree though. Sometimes it is much harder to leave so people stay. I'd personally rather do it the hard way if I needed to. x
jeniaaa
Well-Known Member
No i would never forgive a cheater,Life is just to short to be with someone that can't be faithful!
Jen889
Well-Known Member
I did in the pasy but it lasted 2months after the event as i had no trust and was extremely angry at him because he denied it ever happened (still does three years later, although i don't care anymore he will always bring it up). long story short my big brother and his girlfriend caught my ex on a date with a girl.
now..i have the most amazing boyfriend and couldnt be happier. TRUST is number one in a relationship, once that's gone the relationship is gone.
now..i have the most amazing boyfriend and couldnt be happier. TRUST is number one in a relationship, once that's gone the relationship is gone.
facelashbrow
Well-Known Member
Oh I see, I know what you mean-deliberately turning a blind eye... I couldn't do that!x
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