Children? Yes, No and why

[adelekeegan1]

Since I started a poll about partners it got me thinking about children and how many of you do or don't have kids.

I don't have any children, this is not from choice. I lost a baby at 23 weeks when I was 24 and had been trying for 2 years. Surgery afterwards resulted in damaged tubes. Tried IVF eventually but was unsuccessful. Took a long time to adjust, my marriage didn't survive and it was only when I met my 2nd husband that I came to terms with it.

 

[Lellipop]

Yes I choose to have children because I love them and family means everything to me So I had my first at 24 and then because of post-natal depression waited 6 years before I was ready to try again so was 30 when my second came along.

 

[Jennykins]

I have a 9 month old daughter - Evangeline (or evie geek on here!!) and i have 2 and half year old step son called Tristan. Before hubby & i got together i said i didn't want children but being with Anthony and spending time with Tristan totally changed my views!

I love children, don't know what i did without them.
I have the contraceptive implant in my arm so it'll will be a while before we have any more!!

 

[Tsia]

Since I started a poll about partners it got me thinking about children and how many of you do or don't have kids.



I don't have any children, this is not from choice. I lost a baby at 23 weeks when I was 24 and had been trying for 2 years. Surgery afterwards resulted in damaged tubes. Tried IVF eventually but was unsuccessful. Took a long time to adjust, my marriage didn't survive and it was only when I met my 2nd husband that I came to terms with it.

Sorry to hear that. I want children but fear not being able to. Had some problems with monthlys etc... been through all types of tests, they found nothing. Been 'sort of' trying for 18 months, but nothing.
I hope one day I will get a surprise, but I am not holding my breath.xx

 

[Annemari]

I dont have any children yet, been living with my partner for about a year and we aren't quite ready yet, my sister has two babies and I absolutely love them. They are a major part of my life, couldn't do without them!

I have polycystic ovaries so when i do start trying I expect it will take a while... All in good time tho!​

 

[* Helen *]

I chose 'No by choice.' I have a quite large family, 5 sisters (2 young), & at the moment I have 3 young nieces & 1 young nephew & 1 pregnant sister, so they keep me busy as an Aunty & I can "hand" them back when they are being difficult & have had a smelly one:lol:

I am quite happy the way I am but I am only 21 so who knows in the future!!

 

[*Gemma*]

I have 4, I only planned to have 2 but when I fell pregnant with the third I knew I would have to even things up. They range from 17 to 11 and although they drive me nuts sometimes I am so glad they are back to school and college, I certainly wouldn't be without them.

 

[Klassy Klaws]

I choose 'Yes but not really planned' I fell pregnant when I was 18 I hadn't really thought about having kids so the choice was taken out of my hands.
My second daughter was born 20 months after the first she was planned I decided it would be nice for the eldest to have a sibling about the same age, the youngest came along almost 5 years after the second and again she wasn't planned.

I don't regret having the girls but I do feel I lost out on alot of my 'Teen' years but on the other hand I don't think I would have had the guts to go and do all the Courses I have done in the last year when I was 18 so things worked out better plus my hubby and me can now afford to go out and enjoy ourselves and the girls are old enough to look after themselves.:lol:

 

[Tilly Ann]

I have picked 'No out of choice'!!
This is for a very strange reason!!!
To me i find the whole mother thing very un natural which i know is very hard to believe!! I do love kids and I love playing with them etc but I could never ever see myself as a mother!! The thought of being pregnant scares the living daylights out of me! I even have nightmares about it which is wierd!! Not sure what it all means!!
Another reason is that I am worried if I ever did have children that i wouldn't have that mother/child bond with them because I find it so un natural and scary!!

Please dont take this the wrong way, i dont mean its an un natural thing, obviously it is the most natural thing in the world! I just mean to me I can't ever see it feeling right for me to have a child!!

Now then, did that make any sense at all!?!?!?! I am a right wierdo!!!!

 

[Vetty]

I voted 'yes by choice' and I have my son who is 7 and my daughter who is 4. It wasn't always and easy path and with 2 miscarriages I wondered for a while if we'd end up with any at all...... I wasn't fussed about having kids through most of my 20's but then we decided we did and having them has fulfilled something in me that I didn't know was missing..... I know that doesn't really make sense, and I do believe you can be happy without them but for me it made me complete.

I still love babies, and have a 3 month old nephew to snuggle, but I'm glad to give him back and definitley don't want any more!

 

[Vetty]

Another reason is that I am worried if I ever did have children that i wouldn't have that mother/child bond with them because I find it so un natural and scary!!

Now then, did that make any sense at all!?!?!?! I am a right wierdo!!!!

Kirsten, you're not a wierdo at all!! I didn't like children particularly when I was younger - the first nappy I changed was my son's! In fact I often don't like other peoples children now, I'm definitely not an earth mother type who want to be surrounded by all the kids in the street!

You'd be surprised at how nature kicks into action when it's needed! Also, there's nothing to be ashamed of in needing more in your life even when you have kids. I've always worked from when mine were babies and not always for purely financial reasons......

 

[Tilly Ann]

Kirsten, you're not a wierdo at all!! I didn't like children particularly when I was younger - the first nappy I changed was my son's! In fact I often don't like other peoples children now, I'm definitely not an earth mother type who want to be surrounded by all the kids in the street!

You'd be surprised at how nature kicks into action when it's needed! Also, there's nothing to be ashamed of in needing more in your life even when you have kids. I've always worked from when mine were babies and not always for purely financial reasons......

:hug: Thanks hun!!
I do like kids!! When I was younger I used to want 4 kids, 2 boys and 2 girls, I even thought up names!!! I just could never, ever, ever imagine it now!! I am very career minded so maybe its that?
Has anyone been watching Coronation Street with poor Claire? I am worrie dthat that is how I will be!!

 

[Vetty]

:hug: Thanks hun!!
I do like kids!! When I was younger I used to want 4 kids, 2 boys and 2 girls, I even thought up names!!! I just could never, ever, ever imagine it now!! I am very career minded so maybe its that?
Has anyone been watching Coronation Street with poor Claire? I am worrie dthat that is how I will be!!

You're 12 years younger than me so you've got plenty of time yet!!! At the risk of sounding ancient, you'll probably feel different in a few years time.....

Sorry if that sounds patronising, don't mean to!!

 

[BABSann]

I voted yes from choice.I have 3 kids,my eldest is nearly 19,I had her when I was 20,nearly 21,the other 2 boys are 13 and 15.Its hard work and expensive but I wouldn't be without any of them for the world.I have clients who talk to me about their fertility problems and it makes me feel so pleased that I am blessed with my kids.Dont get me wrong it's damned hard with a house full of hormones and 2 of my kids being taller than me.I have to be tough as hubby so soft with them it's untrue.Sometimes I get their first babygrow out and marvel that they were ever that small.Where has the time gone eh!!!

 

[Tilly Ann]

You're 12 years younger than me so you've got plenty of time yet!!! At the risk of sounding ancient, you'll probably feel different in a few years time.....

Sorry if that sounds patronising, don't mean to!!

Not at all hun!! LOL! Thats what everyone says!! I just can't see it happening thats all!! I'm going to be a lonley old woman who has lots of guinea pigs or something!!

 

[oey]

Dont know which option to choose as most of you know i am nearing the end of my first IVF treatment. Will be able to answer in 10 days time though!

 

[BABSann]

Dont know which option to choose as most of you know i am nearing the end of my first IVF treatment. Will be able to answer in 10 days time though!

I didn't know hun,good luck.:hug: xx

 

[dee]

i have 2 by choice , i had a miscarraige the 1st time which put me off ever trying again, but hubby talked me round :green: i think i was so scared something would go wrong i just backed off completley, through both pregnancies i had scares but luckily they both arrived well and healthy:hug:
i wouldnt know what to do without them now , even though i never wanted kids when i was younger :lol:

 

[NtricateDesigns]

My hubby and I have 4 kids, they were all unplanned, we were just doing a whole lotta *you know what* so we weren't exactly shocked it happened.

:Kissing: They are SO sweet... Kids definitely make your life a lot better:Love:

 

[Bagpuss]

yes yes yes....to all 3 of my girls....love being preggers, love giving birth, love babies, yeah its hard work sometimes but i cant imagine my life without them.

what ever makes YOU happy...whats for some isn't for others...thats what makes us all special. xxx