Fear

[lu-B-lu]

Do you embrace it or let it control you?

The reason I ask is I was lying in bed last night thinking about all the things I dont do because I worry so much.

For example:
I have a massive (irrational) fear of flying, so much so the furthest 'abroad' I've been in 11 years is the Isle or Wight & I could actually swim there from where I live! :lol:
My partner & kids end up going on holidays without me, I miss out (my own doing entierly) not seeing them all enjoying themselves and all of us experiencing new things together!

Before you mention it, I have tried almost everything to combat it, fear of flying courses, alcohol, hypnotism, drugs (prescription only I hasten to add). My nick-name is actually B.A. Baracus :green:

I also have a fear of public transport & am already winding myself up about trekking up to London on my own for Pro-Beauty! But I WILL do it!!

Fear controls alot of my life actually, so this year I've decided I'm gonna grow a pair and do something about it!

So, what have you put off/turned down because you were afraid?

And then there's the flip side, are you a fly by the seat of your pants kinda gal/guy that just dives in head first & deals with the consequences later?
If so what's your inspirational story & could I have whatever your having please?

 

[chocolatepickle]

I'm scared of everything!
BUT
I put bad thoughts out of my head and try everything to avoid thinking remotely about them... ignorance is bliss and all that.

So as as result, despite being a big fat scaredy cat i still dive in head first to things so i dont take the time to over think anything!

Someone said recently :wink2: "In life we regret the things we didn't do more than the things we did.
Don't let fear control you, embrace it instead!! "

I definitely think you should listen to that wise person!! x

 

[Tantrum]

Hi, i had a sickening fear of heights. Even looking over balcony in a shopping centre had me dizzy and shaking (the glass barriers didnt help)
my friend thought it was mad and said we should do a bungee jump or something one day to fix it, the idea of that alone had me shaking.

well he died, so i decided to do something for a charity kind of related to him and thought i'd raise more if it was something people knew would terrify me.
i done a parachue jump:lol: it was absolutely great and i'll have to do another one at some stage.. really think "feel the fear and do it anyway"

 

[Blinkingorgeous]

I know how you feel lu-b-lu, Im scared of EVERYTHING and fear completely rules my life, so much so that I only travel approx 20 miles in each direction of my house and only if its not on motorways or the area I dont know or 50 million other unreasonable reasons :irked: I dont fly or take public transport, in fact it was so bad that approx a year ago I melted, well and truly :green: Iv had anxiety (and Im talking sever anxiety) for 18 years, tried CBT, hypontherapy, counciling bladie bladie bla

I feel for you hun :cry: but you definately arent alone, you see really I am a fly by the seat of your pants kinda gal trapped in a wuss mind!!!!!! If you cant laugh!!!!!!!!

 

[Penny Vintage]

I have a fear of spiders, it gets to the point if I know it's somewhere in the room I will lock myself upstairs away from it! Also the thought of them makes me feel sick, there legs n the way they run :-/. Also since (and only since) all the plane crashes and accidents I now am too scared to fly. I literally would pass out if I got on a flight now

 

[dee]

i am scared of everything .. but i also tend to wing it and if i cant cope then i just quit , lol
i stress myself out over work etc.. an i worry about everything , my god i am so bad i used to make sure i took my son to the loo incase he fell headfirst into it !! who on earth thinks like that , lmao
its actually quite funny coz when you talk to people you find out theres actually a fair few with the same fears , unless i just have totally crazy mates , hehe

 

[dandelionpoppy]

Spiders. Even typing it makes me feel ill.
When it's situations I find that "acting" the part helps x

 

[Chameleon]

The human brain is a wonderful tool we have,yet we let ourselves fear...and for what reason:lol:

Only you can stop yourself from not being afraid.However i know that is easier said than done,but it is only yourself that can be in control of your decisions.

Once you accept things that can not be changed and accept the facts that anything is achievable,you can set your mind to it....

please do not think this is harsh criticism,it is just some words from my own mind,from someone who has overcome all odds....as Alexandra Billings once said,"i never see the things i have as a curse but as a pretty package in a bow all wrapped up!"....or words to that effect....and she is one inspirational lady!:hug:

 

[lu-B-lu]

Wow! Thanks guys, some real awe inspiring stuff! Lovely to know I'm not the only kooky one in town!! :hug:

Chocolatepickle - I was wondering when that quote would jump up to bite me on my ass!! :lol:

Tantrum - Truley inspirational, ultimate respect for you!!

Blinkingorgeous - I know exactly what you mean, if I had it my way I proably wouldn't leave the house some days, this is why we need to make a stand and take back control of our own destiny.... bring it on world I'm pumped and ready for ya!!

Dee- LOL!! I often think of worst case scenarios, so yes kids falling down toilets has most probably crossed my mind on several occasions!!

Keep 'em coming guys, this is brill & so much cheaper than therapy! :lol: xx

 

[*sarah*]

I'm a big feardy the older I get is seems to creep into other things I was never bothered about! I do have an overactive imagaination, and have suffered with depression & anxiety attacks for nearly 10 years my driving and flying has been affected the past 2 years, undergoing hypnosis though and seems to be working a treat maybe give it another go, I got mine thru nhs xx

 

[VHunter]

I've seen a lot of scarey moments in my life... it's likely I could write a movie that would have the lot of you gasping in surprise and/or shock.

That said, I learned that for me, the best thing to do was hit Fear like a Mac Truck and hit it HARD.

Once you've faced it, it's done. You've accomplished facing it, and come out on the other side still intact and a WINNER!

For some things, I had to mentally psych myself up, faking confidence, talking in my head "you can do it, you can kick it's ass" etc.
Sometimes, faking confidence turns into the real deal.

After facing several fears in that way... I've come to believe STRONGLY that there is NOTHING I can't face or accomplish if I set my mind to doing so.

And in a nutshell, that's what it's about: setting your mind and making the concious decision to kick some serious butt.

What is fear anyway, but 'worry' that something negative will result?
Worry is a waste of energy and accomplishes a BIG FAT ZERO and does more harm than good. Sometimes, worry will result in poor health.
That's not good.

Positive thinking on the other hand, and dealing with the results of whatever it is WHEN IT HAPPENS and not before... much healthier.

:hug:

 

[kirsty14]

Hi

Just under two yrs ago I was sent offshore to an oil rig by my then company (I work in hr by day) it was 1st April as it was my first time offshore I was really nervous and not looking forward to the helicopter flight all the way out. Never the less I made it and everything was fine, I arrived onboard and got settled in, it was about 2pm in the afternoon and I just settled Down to some emails when the rig manager came in and told me that a helicopter from one Of the near by rigs had gone Down. I had no idea really what to expect but I jus thought that it had maybe gone to low and ended up in the water ... A few minutes later I was in the tea room watching the news .. Headlines said no survivors! It turned out the rotary blade from the helicopter had disengaged and the helicopter had free fallen into the water... It had fallen literally out of the sky from such a height and at ridiculous speed that as it hit the water it exploded into a million bits instantly killing all 16 guys onboard! As you can imagine I was so scared to fly on a helicopter but I was due off the rig the following day! I could have chosen to get a boat back to shore but I knew that if I didn't get on that helicopter the next day I would be scared forever so I made the choice to just board the helicopter and face it! Everyone was anxious but I believe I needed to do it to get over the fear! It was such a sad day I'll remember it Forever but my point is why fear the things we can't control... Lifes too short get out there and throw 2 sheets to the wind and embrace it xx

 

[lpq]

Hi

Just under two yrs ago I was sent offshore to an oil rig by my then company (I work in hr by day) it was 1st April as it was my first time offshore I was really nervous and not looking forward to the helicopter flight all the way out. Never the less I made it and everything was fine, I arrived onboard and got settled in, it was about 2pm in the afternoon and I just settled Down to some emails when the rig manager came in and told me that a helicopter from one Of the near by rigs had gone Down. I had no idea really what to expect but I jus thought that it had maybe gone to low and ended up in the water ... A few minutes later I was in the tea room watching the news .. Headlines said no survivors! It turned out the rotary blade from the helicopter had disengaged and the helicopter had free fallen into the water... It had fallen literally out of the sky from such a height and at ridiculous speed that as it hit the water it exploded into a million bits instantly killing all 16 guys onboard! As you can imagine I was so scared to fly on a helicopter but I was due off the rig the following day! I could have chosen to get a boat back to shore but I knew that if I didn't get on that helicopter the next day I would be scared forever so I made the choice to just board the helicopter and face it! Everyone was anxious but I believe I needed to do it to get over the fear! It was such a sad day I'll remember it Forever but my point is why fear the things we can't control... Lifes too short get out there and throw 2 sheets to the wind and embrace it xx

Just saw your post and had to comment. Wow you are one brave lady I feel quite inspired that is amazing! I was in Florida and due to fly to new York on 9/11 when the horrible terrorist attack happened, it is surreal to think about it now. We had to stay in Florida an extra 2weeks before we could fly home and I've always Been scared of flying since then but if I didn't brave it and board the flight I would never see glorious sunshine, living in Scotland you really do need to go find some sun!!! I've got OCD and now find my rituals get me through some fears like flying, I have to put my ear plugs in at the exact minute the steward blows into the fake life raft thingy and read the safety book 3 times and then I feel kind of soothed don't laugh!!



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[crystaltash]

I am petrified of wasps. Even hearing the word in my head starts my palms sweating. If I see one, I just have to get away from it, no matter where I am and even then, I can't relax. They absolutely paralyse me with fear.

 

[Gcross]

I'm in my 20's and I'm scared of the dark....silly I know! When my husbands works away I have to sleep with the lights on or get my sister to come over and stay with me. I also have a very bad phobia of sharks, I can't look at a picture of them, if I do see a picture in a newspaper or something then the newspaper will go flying across the room my heart starts beating really fast and I get all shaky and sweaty. I can't stand hearing the jaws theme tune and I can't get in a swimming pool on my own because all I think about is sharks swimming around. If I go in to the sea I stay close to the shore and make sure other people are out further then me, that way I think they will get eaten first giving me time to get back on the beach lol!!! Xxx

 

[Blue Rose]

Do you embrace it or let it control you?

And then there's the flip side, are you a fly by the seat of your pants kinda gal/guy that just dives in head first & deals with the consequences later?
If so what's your inspirational story & could I have whatever your having please?

Yep, that would be me :green:

If I allowed myself to be, there's plenty of fears & worries that would stop me doing stuff but I'm a great believer in the old adage "Feel the fear & do it anyway". I'm by no means naturally full of confidence but I have enough confidence & self-belief (just about most of the time. I do have my off days!) to just convince myself I can do it. The mind is a very powerful tool!

I've had plenty of business disasters over the years. Most people would probably take the hint & give up. But that is sooo not in my nature so here I am, yet again, trying something new, lol. Time will tell if it turns into a disaster or not but if I don't try, I won't know.

Public speaking, hate, hate, hate it but went to a networking event last month where we had to talk for 3 minutes. I nearly didn't go but I did, & I'm still here to tell the tale.

Reading some of your posts, makes me feel quite sad that you're letting your irrational fears get the better of you. Why don't some of you try one thing new to over come some of your fears?

 

[lu-B-lu]

Ipq - Love your little ritual! Whatever works for you! I'm your typical nervous passenger....

If the cabin crew aren't smiling I automaticaly assume somethings wrong, when infact I should remember they are only human too and could just be suffering with indigestion!

Also any 'weird' noises going on, well of course that's the left fa-langey falling off and the planes gonna drop out the sky!!

Sounds so funny typing that, it feels so real in person!

Blue Rose - thank you for your very inspiring post, I think alot of us should take a leaf from your book & throw caution to the wind more often.

So, this weekend I will be writing down a small list of things I'd like to have conquered by the end of the year, starting with Pro Beauty & the train & tube journey there.

Who's joining me with a list?

Maybe together we can all spur each other on to achieve something we never thought was possible!! xx

 

[chazzybabe]

Mines a little strange i absolutely hate talking on the phone to people, and i get really worried when someone rings that i dont know it will take me a good half hour to pick up the courage to phone back, family members get a brief conversation with me on the phone...so bad lol although if i meet someone in person im really chatty and confident anyone else have this fear or just me lol

 

[mkbeauty]

Mines a little strange i absolutely hate talking on the phone to people, and i get really worried when someone rings that i dont know it will take me a good half hour to pick up the courage to phone back, family members get a brief conversation with me on the phone...so bad lol although if i meet someone in person im really chatty and confident anyone else have this fear or just me lol

I also have the fear of talking to people on the phone too. Had it since I was a teenager. I don't even know what triggered it off! I'm a very confident and chatty in person but the complete opposite on the phone. Glad I'm not the only one x

 

[lpq]

Mines a little strange i absolutely hate talking on the phone to people, and i get really worried when someone rings that i dont know it will take me a good half hour to pick up the courage to phone back, family members get a brief conversation with me on the phone...so bad lol although if i meet someone in person im really chatty and confident anyone else have this fear or just me lol

oh my god me too!! i thought i was the only one. I try so hard not to let it affect my business but its so hard answering the phone sometimes even though it could mean losing a customer!