TechJaylee
Well-Known Member
A friend who owns a salon sent this to me, and I just thought it was the greatest idea!! I sure as heck get bitchy!! And being in this industry you tend to listen to your clients problems and do nothing but be supportive and keep a smile on your face.. And its not always easy!!
I think every salon should have this Bitch-Buddy contract in place.
Have you ever had one of those days when you just didn't feel like being nice? Do you ever feel like this BE NICE thing is just a bunch of crap? Well, let me say, welcome to the human race.
Of course you'll have days when you don't feel like being nice. Everyone does. We all need time to process, whine, moan, and complain. It's a natural part of who we are. What's important, however, is that when you're having one of those days, you don't pollute everyone around you. Instead, you need a "bitch-buddy."
My friends and co-workers have used and practiced this system for many years. In fact, we're quite up-front about it. We call it our "Who's Your Bitch-Buddy?" system.
A bitch-buddy is someone you can gripe toa nonjudgmental, confidential sounding board. A bitch-buddy is a person you can talk to when you feel bitter, mean, nasty, and ugly.
I've known my bitch-buddy, Dennis, since we were young children, and he's been my best friend for many, many years. At least once a week, I let Dennis know that I need a "session" with himI need for him to be my listening, nonjudgmental ear as I download my latest thoughts, adventures, and struggles.
I've learned through past mistakes that if I were to whine and complain to friends or team members who perhaps didn't understand that I was just having an off day, they'd jump to all sorts of inaccurate conclusions: Uh-oh, Winn's depressed. I'd better warn everyone. The company must be in trouble. My paycheck is going to bounce. I'd better find a new job.
You might be thinking, Winn, why do you need a bitch-buddy so often? Please know that I'm not always whining and complaining in my sessions with Dennis. Most of the time, I just need a sounding boardI just need to hear my own voice speak my own thoughts. I don't want to gamble with the words I speak, so my bitch-buddy fits the bill. Bottom line, my sessions with Dennis are more about my growth than they are about negative complaining and drama.
Bitch-Buddy Guidelines
Here are some guidelines to help you partner with your bitch-buddy in the most productive and effective ways.
First, decide who your bitch-buddy could be. Choose wisely, because the role that this person plays in your life is as important as having a great therapist, coach, medical doctor, or financial advisor. Perhaps sharing my book BE NICE (OR ELSE!) with some of your friends and confidants, and then asking for their input and response, could help you find out who your bitch-buddy might be. Once you know, then the two of you "contract" with each other.
You and your bitch-buddy agree that:
* You only get one bitch-buddy to bitch to. If you make it a bad habit of bitching to more than one person, eventually half don't want to hear it and the other half think you deserve your problems.
* Your bitch-buddy isn't just for bitching. You must also share the news when things are going great.
* The bitch-buddy system goes both ways: You take turns and each be a buddy to the other.
BITCH-BUDDY CONTRACT
How to Be a Bitch-Buddy
1. You must sit and LISTEN. Only give advice and input if they are requested.
2. You absolutely cannot use the information outside of the conversation in which it was shared. You cannot share it with other people, and you cannot bring it up with the person at another time.
3. The next day, the person who bitched to you will most likely be back to their wonderful, positive self. You cannot bring up the bitch session or information that was shared with you the previous day.
The bitch-buddy system works best when one person is bitching and one is supporting. The bitch session is not for matching wits, comparing stories, or having a who-had-the-worst-day competition.
My Bitch-Buddy Promise
* YES, I will be your bitch-buddy.
* You can complain, moan, whine, and bitch to me on those days when you need to get mean, nasty, and ugly.
* I promise not to judge or think less of you, because you need to express yourself.
* I promise that I will not do anything with the information you share.
* I promise that I will not repeat it to anyone.
* I promise that I will not give you advice or feedback unless you ask me to.
* I promise that I will not hold the information against you later.
* When you request a bitching session, I promise to hold back my personal complaints and woes for another bitching session at another time.
Got this from beniceorelse.com check it out.
While you're there get your self a copy of the book.
I think every salon should have this Bitch-Buddy contract in place.
Have you ever had one of those days when you just didn't feel like being nice? Do you ever feel like this BE NICE thing is just a bunch of crap? Well, let me say, welcome to the human race.
Of course you'll have days when you don't feel like being nice. Everyone does. We all need time to process, whine, moan, and complain. It's a natural part of who we are. What's important, however, is that when you're having one of those days, you don't pollute everyone around you. Instead, you need a "bitch-buddy."
My friends and co-workers have used and practiced this system for many years. In fact, we're quite up-front about it. We call it our "Who's Your Bitch-Buddy?" system.
A bitch-buddy is someone you can gripe toa nonjudgmental, confidential sounding board. A bitch-buddy is a person you can talk to when you feel bitter, mean, nasty, and ugly.
I've known my bitch-buddy, Dennis, since we were young children, and he's been my best friend for many, many years. At least once a week, I let Dennis know that I need a "session" with himI need for him to be my listening, nonjudgmental ear as I download my latest thoughts, adventures, and struggles.
I've learned through past mistakes that if I were to whine and complain to friends or team members who perhaps didn't understand that I was just having an off day, they'd jump to all sorts of inaccurate conclusions: Uh-oh, Winn's depressed. I'd better warn everyone. The company must be in trouble. My paycheck is going to bounce. I'd better find a new job.
You might be thinking, Winn, why do you need a bitch-buddy so often? Please know that I'm not always whining and complaining in my sessions with Dennis. Most of the time, I just need a sounding boardI just need to hear my own voice speak my own thoughts. I don't want to gamble with the words I speak, so my bitch-buddy fits the bill. Bottom line, my sessions with Dennis are more about my growth than they are about negative complaining and drama.
Bitch-Buddy Guidelines
Here are some guidelines to help you partner with your bitch-buddy in the most productive and effective ways.
First, decide who your bitch-buddy could be. Choose wisely, because the role that this person plays in your life is as important as having a great therapist, coach, medical doctor, or financial advisor. Perhaps sharing my book BE NICE (OR ELSE!) with some of your friends and confidants, and then asking for their input and response, could help you find out who your bitch-buddy might be. Once you know, then the two of you "contract" with each other.
You and your bitch-buddy agree that:
* You only get one bitch-buddy to bitch to. If you make it a bad habit of bitching to more than one person, eventually half don't want to hear it and the other half think you deserve your problems.
* Your bitch-buddy isn't just for bitching. You must also share the news when things are going great.
* The bitch-buddy system goes both ways: You take turns and each be a buddy to the other.
BITCH-BUDDY CONTRACT
How to Be a Bitch-Buddy
1. You must sit and LISTEN. Only give advice and input if they are requested.
2. You absolutely cannot use the information outside of the conversation in which it was shared. You cannot share it with other people, and you cannot bring it up with the person at another time.
3. The next day, the person who bitched to you will most likely be back to their wonderful, positive self. You cannot bring up the bitch session or information that was shared with you the previous day.
The bitch-buddy system works best when one person is bitching and one is supporting. The bitch session is not for matching wits, comparing stories, or having a who-had-the-worst-day competition.
My Bitch-Buddy Promise
* YES, I will be your bitch-buddy.
* You can complain, moan, whine, and bitch to me on those days when you need to get mean, nasty, and ugly.
* I promise not to judge or think less of you, because you need to express yourself.
* I promise that I will not do anything with the information you share.
* I promise that I will not repeat it to anyone.
* I promise that I will not give you advice or feedback unless you ask me to.
* I promise that I will not hold the information against you later.
* When you request a bitching session, I promise to hold back my personal complaints and woes for another bitching session at another time.
Got this from beniceorelse.com check it out.
While you're there get your self a copy of the book.