Why is that diamond ring SO important?

[mizzy_dizzy]

I think it depends .
I had never really given much thought to marriage , was always content enough doing things my way , brought up by a single mum , and then myself a single mum 3x I'd had my share of broken promises , but I wasn't to fussed , I was happy enough.

When sean and i had been together a while with him in the US Air Force , living in Italy , and me on the Isle of Wight , I didn't really see us going anywhere fast.
He had kind of talked about us getting married when he got back from Iraq , but to me it was just talk , the kind people have when one is in a war zone. So I didn't take it to much to heart .

, I was happy to just say we wear engaged and leave it like that.

When he got back from his deployment we all went on holiday to Italy and then went on a road trip to a Bavarian German castle Neuschwanstein ,
He got down on one knee and pulled out that box with the ring I can honestly say I was shocked .

I'd never even seen a real diamond before (that's how little I cared about jewelry and things)

It instantly ment a lot to me, not as a status object , but as a symbol that he really did want that commitment.

Since that time we married in las vegas , moved to Germany , and now America And we are coming up to celebrating our 6th wedding anavercery soon !

P.s I still don't ware any jewelry much the rings mostly stay in a box as I have fat fingers lol so it's not like its based on the ring but when it was presented to me it showed me he ment it.

The castle

The ring it's self has clear symbolism attached , the circle is never ending .

On my request we had a handfasting ceremony for our wedding , the cords that wear used to bind us mean as much to me as the rings . <3






<3 love is like the magic penny .

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[MaisyMouse]

Well I have quite strong personal opinions on the subject,

first I think wedding are right for other people,

like going to a good wedding but never wanted to be a bride,

would never change my name and I don't believe it makes anyone more committed to there relationship if anything make a lot of people complacent,

This I just my vue on it so don't shout at me, but I think a lot of men feel pressured to propose when really it doesn't mean that much to them,

Im not religious ,i live in Scotland an wish common in law actually insisted,

in about 6 weeks time I will have been with my partner for 11 years and we have been though so much together alot of bad and have both nearly given it all up, but im am truly committed to this relationship and I will fight tooth and nail to keep it as long as at the end of the day we still love each other,

I probably get asked on a weekly biases if am married and why not and my answer in normally something like I don't need a peace of paper to tell me im committed to my relationship :-D

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These are my exact thoughts, I do not want to get married, I couldn't think of anything worse than a wedding, I don't even like going to anyone else.

I have been with my boyfriend for 10 years and I constantly get asked when we are getting married, I was asked 3 times yesterday by clients :irked:

And I don't like wearing jewellery anyway

 

[Gemster]

My partner had a diamond eternity band handmade for me when we had been together 10 months and the ring has been on my finger ever since. Everyday it catches my eye and makes me smile, not because it is huge or valuable, but because it is a constant reminder of what I mean to him.

I would love us to get married one day; I want to get married in the church where my parents got married and my darling grandad is buried, wearing my mum's wedding dress, so that we can celebrate our commitment to each other with our friends and family - it is not about a big party full of hangers on. I want to be able to call him my husband (boyfriend does feel a bit silly after 7 years!) and when we have children I want us all to have the same surname.

Saying all that though, if he doesn't ever want to get married, I'd rather be with him and unmarried forever than be with anyone else.

I think we live in a world of celebrity and crazy consumerism now which is tarnishing most things, including marriage, but if it's for the right reasons I don't think there's anything wrong with dreaming about marriage.

 

[nicole333]

I love being married and everything that goes with it, which is a complete turnaround from what I expected out of life. I never dreamed of being a bride as it never entered my head as a child and growing up I experienced bad examples of relationships so married life was not for me, no way!

Next week we celebrate our ten year wedding anniversary but have been together for twenty one years, so it took me a little while to change my way of thinking! We were living together and had the commitment etc etc, but I was terrified of marriage. I'm so glad I got over my fear. :Love:

 

[mrsd88]

I don't think it's important I got married at 21 don't have a big ring & only had a small registry office wedding family only except my best friend there was only 20 guests, we are still together just had our 4th anniversary, I do think its more putting time into the marriage, respecting one another making time for each other it's the little things that count the things that you can't buy!

 

[Penny Vintage]

I am a massive diamond fan but im more about clarity than anything. My engagement ring is from a second hand shop, i just said traditional style and second hands best as you get more for the money. Mine has a lovely design holding the diamond and i think its from 1950s. Im in love with it and he said he wanted to do the traditional thing of a months money on it. But he wasnt a massive earner. I would love a massive celebrity style ring but it wouldnt mean so much to me! Wedding wise i want something small and just family and a very laid back style. Id do decorations as I like doing that stuff.
My ex friend had her ring made, chose every single aspect and was so demanding she refused to get engaged until she had the ring She wanted! She was bridezilla before even getting engaged. The wedding was no different! But it was in a glum registry and cost her family 20k. Shed throw a tantrum if she didnt get her way. Why marry someone like that?! :thumbdown:

 

[Nailtechybee]

My wedding ring and before that, engagement ring, have meant the world to me on several occasions. They go with me everywhere, and comfort me to know I am not alone. They remind me of the vows spoken and the promises made on my wedding day. I have often taken comfort of the physical object to remind me that I am loved and cared for by a wonderful man. You know times when you feel scared and alone, those are the times I twiddle my rings with my other hand and remember that when I get home that evening, back to my husbands arms, it will all be ok.

 

[happyfeet]

I love being married. I was with my husband for 8 years before we got married, we have a son so every time we thought about getting married it got put on the back burner because there was always other things to pay for. However on my 30th bday two years ago we finally did it with our son as best man. Just a small wedding but it was the best day of my life along with the birth of our son. We wanted a wedding that was about us and like us and that's what we got

I already had my husbands surname id changed it by deed poll a few years previous when we couldn't afford to get married and I personally wanted to share my sons surname. Me and mr happyfeet were as good as married anyway but for us it does feel different being married. I still get a thrill when he refers to me as the wife

Each to their own, it's a very personal thing. Xxx

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[siobrennan]

I have to admit to having very sparkly engagement, wedding and eternity rings!! I love it, it's very me, and I helped pick it. I know that doesn't sound so romantic but the proposal was off the chart romantic, and he said he didn't want to get me a ring I didn't like so we went together to the jewellers, he told them the budget (I went to the other side of the shop so I didn't hear!) and we chose the ring together. If the jeweller had brought out a tray of jelly sweety rings it wouldn't have mattered as its the symbolism of it for me, that this gorgeous man was going to marry me!!! We have been ,arrived 5years now and have a 3yr old daughter
My sister on the other hand is blissfully content and happy, has been with her partner for about 9yrs, they have a beautiful son and another on the way and have no intention of marrying! And it works perfectly for them xxx

 

[siobrennan]

I also wear my late mums eternity ring, it meant so much to her and now means the world to me! I hope my daughter feels the same about my jewellery lol xx

 

[Abbie101]

For me it's not about a big diamond, I don't wear jewellery anyway just a pandora bracelet my boyfriend brought me last year, but me an my boyfriend have spoken about marriage we both want it but he wants it to be when we've had children who are old enough to be involved with the wedding so I know I have a long wait as we don't have one child yet but I think I'd like my own little family and all the same last name. I'm not bothered if its a charity shop second hand ring ill be grateful of any ring &#128522;xx

 

[Ashley Blakemore]

We got married in vegas, cost about £1000 in total. We got married to be a family for our little girl, we actually feel like a unit now we are married...so its not all about the ring or paper! Its how you perceive it & everyone has their own reasons to get married. I believe that it is only people who have had a bad experience with marriage that like to put the married people down like its not necessary!!? If your happy not married then thats fine but you shouldn't assume your only married for the diamond ring

 

[coco.]

I feel more settled being married, I love my marriage, it feels special and I love having the same name as my husband and children.
I had a great time planning my wedding which was a great day that many people remember at a lovely place with all our family and friends.
It cost £11,000 9 years ago and I would spend that money again because it was worth every penny.
We even had a weekend in London with my parents too go and buy my shoes from Harrods and I still wear those shoes sometimes to somewhere special.
My wedding created memories that I shall never forget.
That's just how i feel about marriage but I'm a huge romantic so love a good wedding

 

[Hazemalone]

I love my rings, I loved getting my engagement ring and showing it off and it felt even better getting my wedding ring to match. I love when people comment on them because they really are stunning. I am married two years and together 11 and a half. I feel so lucky to have the relationship I have as I feel it's really something so special. We had the whole nine yards wedding and I enjoyed every minute of it. That said if he gave me a piece of string I still would have said yes. I suppose my parents had such a good strong marriage that I always saw it as a part of my own life that the natural thing to be would to follow those foot steps. But to be honest none of our friends are engaged or even looking at marriage as an option so it's different strokes for different folks.

 

[jhgiorgi]

I bought my engagement ring in the sale at h Samuels cus the other half had no money. It was a tiny chip of a diamond. We've now been married 18 years and a few years ago we went to Aruba on holiday and bought a sparkler. we can afford it now we have a mortgage and a little savings. The best things come to those who wait. I have a colleague who is 28 and desperate to get a ring on her finger. She met someone online and within 4 weeks she was looking a rings. They have no money,he's not got a permanent job and she lives at home with her parents. I told her she was mad to think of weddings and babies. She doesn't talk much to me now. I think for her all her friends are settling and she feels left behind.

 

[Biljana]

I can't help but feel that Marriage is very outdated, the very ritual that takes away woman's rights. Maybe not in todays sense but the act itself was established to make that woman a man's 'property'
"To establish a legal father of a woman's children.
To establish a legal mother of a man's children.
To give the husband a monopoly in the wife's sexuality.
To give the wife a monopoly in the husband's sexuality.
To give the husband partial or monopolistic rights to the wife's domestic and other labour services.
To give the wife partial or monopolistic rights to the husband's domestic and other labour services.
To give the husband partial or total over property belonging or potentially accruing to the wife.
To give the wife partial or total over property belonging or potentially accruing to the husband.
To establish a joint fund of property - a partnership - for the benefit of the children of the marriage.
To establish a socially significant 'relationship of affinity' between the husband and his wife's brothers."[14]

Forgive me for pointing out the obvious, but all these reasons for marriage seem null and void when, where ever I turn people are breaking the rules of the said marriage. and as another poster said, most men are terrified and feel pressured to 'commit' through marriage and the ring. Is it really necessary?

 

[Biljana]

Besides, what is in a name? Why do you feel it is important to give up YOUR born identity so that you can 'belong' to your husband? If someone from your past wants to find you, it is that much harder because you gave up your maiden name? 52% of marriages end in divorce, and it is not as easy to change your name back, why would you want to lug around the name of your ex husband?
In this wonderful country, women and men have the EXACT same rights married or cohabiting. Mike and I are recognised by the law and we are each others beneficiaries in every way possible. One could even say, Mike is eager to have a wedding ceremony Because I am in no rush to marry. He knows he has me, and my heart. We have children together and that is the only commitment I need. That we take care of our kids together.
It just dawns on me, that each time I ever talk to anyone, they themselves or someone they know, is going through a separation, and most times it goes like this: "They lived together for X amount of years, finally got married, and now are divorcing" Why fix something that isn't broken?

 

[xxAmyxx]

Why does having the same name as someone make you belong to them? Do I belong to my mum? No and I certainly don't belong to my Dad...

 

[Biljana]

Why does having the same name as someone make you belong to them? Do I belong to my mum? No and I certainly don't belong to my Dad...

You were born into that name, it was given to you at birth, JUST you, just yours, why would you want to give it up?
It is the sentiment of the marriage, the real reasons behind the ceremony, it ties the woman to the man, this practice was started when women had no rights and we have fought very hard to gain rights we have today...

 

[candy cupcake]

The wedding and rings are as important as the couple perceives them to be.

I fall into the camp of having had an amazing wedding day, the most extravagant day we could reasonably afford, and same for the ring, but both agree that our relationship is what we treasure the most.

Enjoy celebrating your love &#9829; but remember the wedding isn't the end, its the beginning.

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