Why is that diamond ring SO important?

[Mobile Manicure]

You don't have to take your husband's name. I didn't. I still use my maiden name. It's on my passport and drivers licence and my bank account. We have our own bank accounts, not a shared one in sight. We just have both our names on the mortgage but he pays it :lol:

 

[LolliDolli]

I'm a sort of traditional girl
Sort of .. We lived together for a year. Then came the ring. Then the marriage. And next (but not quite yet) the kids.
I wouldn't have dreamt of having kids with him without been married.
I have no problem with other people who chose to do that.
It's just what iv always been told.
I only had a small engagement ring and it was a co pledge suprise.
I say had because I got it stuck behind the loo Last week and I'm devastated!!!
I Iove what it stands for and that he chose it



Laura💋

 

[FlawlessBeauty]

I'm happy to be his and his alone and for him to be mine and no others. I'd gladly wear a ring that symbolised our commitment to eachother.

Is the question why is marriage so important to some or is it why do some women care more about a huge rock?

I believe that marriage is for life. My parents are still together after 38 years and are still very happy. I want that regardless of the ring xx

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[Steph86]

I agree the ring its self isnt actually important (although id love a rock &#128142 to me its the commitment that comes with it.

I also believe it depends on if you've been married before, ive not so I would love to get married one day. If you have, & it hasnt worked I can understand the reasoning.

Strangely enough i know several 40 odd year olds who (have never been married) dont see the point in getting married, but people my age (27) seem to be more traditional & want a marriage.

This has been a sore subject with me & my boyfriend (one if these 40 year olds i know ) we actually split over it recently. But we are back together. I DO want to get married, but I want to marry him not someone else. If it takes us a while to get there, so be it. He came back to me.

I dont want the piece of paper or a big expensive day (unless money was no object of course!) i want the commitment & the meaning behind it. Id run off just the two of us & get hitched without a second thought. 💕

Xx

 

[JulieJ]

I've been with my boyfriend 6 years on September 1st. I know he has a ring upstairs in his pants drawer. he thinks its we'll hidden. it's not! ha! I've only seen the box but I know it's a diamond ring. when am I gonna get it though??? x

 

[cath4512]

It is the commitment & love that are important.

I am engaged & due to get married in Jamaica in 10 weeks. It is the second time for us both. I have a beautiful & quite expensive engagement ring which I love, but its not the ring that is important so much as the love & finding my absolute soulmate.

Yes, we can afford the ring & weddingmooon & its lovely, but I wouldnt get into debt for a nice ring/wedding.

We are going away just the two of us to get married & are having a party when we get back. Thats how we want it to be, romantic & just the two of us.

So no the ring in itself is not important...you should only get what you can afford

 

[nat's]

I belong to a few different forums, and well in every day life too I have noticed that women put a LOT of importance on getting that ring. Why does it mean so much to you?
I was there when I was 20 and I got a gorgeous (huge and sparkly) ring and was married a year later with bells and whistles galore, I divorced him 6 years later.
Personally, getting the ring proved to be of no importance, held No commitment value AND the wedding could have paid for half a house! I look around me and realize that most of the happiest couples I have ever met don't have any sort of formal paper stating they are married. I myself am very happy living common law, we are married (heart and head)I don't need the ring or paper. Well, he gave me a gorgeous diamond band for Christmas to wear on my wedding ring finger LOL He is a romantic and wants a wedding, one day I say, but a small gathering in our back yard.
All I am saying is this, the ring will not make your man any more commited than he is right now and from a practical approach the money spent on a big wedding can be put to better use. JMO

Lol we have very similar past's I found 26 a big turning point in my life thought I was going through the change alongside my mother lol. However we live and learn and I am happy to say i'm madly in love with a man that deserves me, we are going to get married on a small scale with a big celebration, we don't want an engagement as that has no relevance to us so it will just be a wedding ring passed thru his family on my finger.
The only advice I have is everybody is different and each to there own. Do what's important to you and what you feel passionate about my aunt's engagement ring cost a fortune and is very important to her as is her husband and they have a strong long lasting marriage. Follow your gut instinct.! X

 

[xxAmyxx]

You were born into that name, it was given to you at birth, JUST you, just yours, why would you want to give it up?
It is the sentiment of the marriage, the real reasons behind the ceremony, it ties the woman to the man, this practice was started when women had no rights and we have fought very hard to gain rights we have today...

Because it's my Dad's name and he hasn't been in my life so why should I want to keep it? Lol. It's only a name, like if I get married and I change my name it will only be a name, nothing more.

 

[dandelionpoppy]

Got engaged at 17, married at 22, children at 25 and 29. Still with my hubby 39 years later.

If I were 22 today would I do the same?

No. Not because I don't love him dearly and believe we would still be together, it just seems more "us" not to.

Shocking or what?

 

[lynn amber]

These are my exact thoughts, I do not want to get married, I couldn't think of anything worse than a wedding, I don't even like going to anyone else.

I have been with my boyfriend for 10 years and I constantly get asked when we are getting married, I was asked 3 times yesterday by clients :irked:

And I don't like wearing jewellery anyway

So glad someone thinks the same as me, its the funny looks you get when you say its not your thing ;-)

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[lynn amber]

You were born into that name, it was given to you at birth, JUST you, just yours, why would you want to give it up?
It is the sentiment of the marriage, the real reasons behind the ceremony, it ties the woman to the man, this practice was started when women had no rights and we have fought very hard to gain rights we have today...

I agree with every thing you have said, and the name well the man never takes the woman's name now that is because traditionally it is an ownership thing like the African slaves where given name from their owners :-/

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[Baggybear]

I agree with every thing you have said, and the name well the man never takes the woman's name now that is because traditionally it is an ownership thing like the African slaves where given name from their owners :-/

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My brother has taken his wifes surname.
Her surname would have died out if she had taken his surname so she asked him to take her name. He said yes.
My dad was a little annoyed that his granchildren wouldn't have his surname but he chilled out when I pointed out that my sisters 2 boys both had our surname (that should have been their dad's surnames) and that my other brothers son also had our surname too so our surname would still continue.

 

[lynn amber]

My brother has taken his wifes surname.
Her surname would have died out if she had taken his surname so she asked him to take her name. He said yes.
My dad was a little annoyed that his granchildren wouldn't have his surname but he chilled out when I pointed out that my sisters 2 boys both had our surname (that should have been their dad's surnames) and that my other brothers son also had our surname too so our surname would still continue.

That's good, but one thing does he become mrs or does she lol that's the other thing I don't like is the miss mrs and men only mr there should only me one for women too because why should a woman declared she is married when a man doesn't. :-/

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[Ashley Blakemore]

I changed my "birth" name when i was 16 as my dad decided to pick his fat wife over his daughter...i changed it by deed poll to my mums name, then changed it again to my husbands. My surname doesn't have any meaning to me, i only changed it so me & my daughter would have the same name! I don't consider that I'm my husbands property, although i consider him mine lol!!....if you don't like marriage then thats fine but please don't put it down!! I could spend all day writing posts about not being married but i keep my opinions to myself because it's not necessary to voice them, its a dead argument isn't it!? I never wanted to get married but we did it for our little girl & I'm so glad we did thats it!

 

[lynn amber]

I changed my "birth" name when i was 16 as my dad decided to pick his fat wife over his daughter...i changed it by deed poll to my mums name, then changed it again to my husbands. My surname doesn't have any meaning to me, i only changed it so me & my daughter would have the same name! I don't consider that I'm my husbands property, although i consider him mine lol!!....if you don't like marriage then thats fine but please don't put it down!! I could spend all day writing posts about not being married but i keep my opinions to myself because it's not necessary to voice them, its a dead argument isn't it!? I never wanted to get married but we did it for our little girl & I'm so glad we did thats it!

I think the hole point in this thread is to see everyones opinions, no one is putting marriage down only saying how they feel about it !

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[happyfeet]

It truly is a personal thing I vowed if I hit 30 we'd stay unmarried. Guess what? We got married at 30. I also said I'd never have another child if I hit 30. Guess what? Two days ago I found out I was pregnant (yay) at 32.

Never say never and each to their own xxx

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[tonicj]

It truly is a personal thing I vowed if I hit 30 we'd stay unmarried. Guess what? We got married at 30. I also said I'd never have another child if I hit 30. Guess what? Two days ago I found out I was pregnant (yay) at 32.

Never say never and each to their own xxx

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Aw happyfeet congratulations! ! I really hope you are happy! Believe me 32 is young. My sister-in-law had her second child at 43 and he is just adored. Oh how lucky you are and I wish you well xx

 

[happyfeet]

Aw thanks honey. We are truly blessed to have a little bean on the way. I'm on a floaty high right now and couldn't be happier. Our little threesome is about to become a foursome xxx

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