Male intimate waxing

[carolynshaw]

Right Need your Help asap please.
I have been doing male waxing for a long time, and clients return again and again, I dont have any problems, and if a newby asks the question what if/ or I may get an erection, my Mantra is: dont worry,,because once i start waxing, this will disappear, as its not a pleasant experience. but normally they so embarrassed I think this has only ocurred on one occasion and yes it went down very quickly, and this client also has returned over the years.

However today i receive a text from a male that i have only waxed once in the past, as i dont put them in my phone under there name until they have been a couple of times. he has said this and i quote: HI ive had waxing from you before, I recently had a wax when the therapist encouraged me to stay erect to minimise the pain, and it worked! would you mind if i did this when getting a wax with you or would you be offended?
I have to say i was quite shocked that a therapist would encourage this, I have yet to reply i want to stay professional in my answer but definately a no no!!

 

[laurakate]

If this therapist genuinely did encourage this then surely he would have gone back to her rather than ask someone else for the same thing.

I think there's a good chance he's lying to be honest and is seeking something sexual from the treatment. I'd say I was fully booked to be honest.

 

[carolynshaw]

Thanks Laura, problem is, can I be fully booked forever, but yes i did think is that a true story,and why dont you go back to her then!!! OMG

 

[gillian w]

I wonder how he would maintain his erection during treatment.
If he has to actually do something that would be what would concern me.
You obviously don't feel comfortable with this I think I would just ignore his texts from now on.

 

[Kim Lawless]

Cobblers! He's just testing the water. I had a call from a guy asking the same thing and my reply was a very cool 'Did she really? Well I suggest you go back to her as that's totally inappropriate'. He couldn't put the phone down quick enough. I don't give a damn what he thought as I wax men every day and they're normal decent guys and wouldn't ask that.

If any waxer says its easier to wax a man when he's erect (and I don't mean standing up), then she has never done intimate waxing on a man. x

 

[Jojo@salongeek]

I wonder how he would maintain his erection during treatment.
If he has to actually do something that would be what would concern me.
You obviously don't feel comfortable with this I think I would just ignore his texts from now on.

That's exactly what I were thinking!!! x

 

[elliebee]

What a load of rubbish!!

He's basically asking "do you mind if I play with myself whilst you wax me"

I wouldn't make any excuses about being fully booked. I would simply say you found his request inappropriate and suggest he find another waxer. Then ignore any future contact

 

[nkdlady]

I think you need to be very firm and very frank with this client. Any signs of embarrassment or nervousness and this client will feed off it.

Unfortunately when you offer male intimate waxing you are vulnerable to people with the wrong intentions trying to use your services.

We operate a system whereas if a client makes any inappropriate comments or just anything which makes our girls feel the slightest bit uncomfortable then we terminate the treatment and ask the client to get dressed. There are no locks on our doors and the therapists are never alone in the salon with a client.

Safety should be your first priority and I honest think that nobody gets paid enough to have to deal with those situations.

I think you should give this guy a call (don't text as this may make the guy feel like he can carry on this method of contact with you) and tell him that as you are a professional, you do not want to have any more interactions with him and if you do hear from him again you will contact the police. There are laws against perverts so please don't feel scared to confront him as he is in the wrong not you.

Luckily, there are so many more decent male clients than there are of the bad ones so I hope this hasn't affected your confidence!

 

[waxingmodel]

Nothing to add really, just that I doubt he would he would make such an enquiry to a male therapist!

 

[Sasha99]

Ask if he minds a trainee in the room whilst you do it and get one of your male friends to come in, the bigger nd rougher lookin the better,lol

 

[carolynshaw]

So...... dont answer at all then? and see if he gets the message loud and clear NOT INTERESTED but if he does text again, i will just refer him back to the person that encourages this,

 

[carolynshaw]

Thanks to everyone for your advice, all taken on board, its great to know im not alone out there, and I will certainly NOT be entertaining him, mwah to you all

 

[carolynshaw]

Thanks Kim x

 

[Kim Lawless]

Thanks Kim x

Welcome sweetheart. x

 

[Angie's Nails]

I have just re-read this post as I wanted to see what was said again. Last week I had a new Client in who said the Therapist he normally goes to gets him to make himself hard as it is easier and less painful to wax. I stood there with spatula in hand waiting for him to finish pumping himself up. I was so embarrassed, (please excuse me for being crude) I just didn't know what to say or where to look. I have been waxing Men just over a year now and class myself as a mature woman who would be able to deal with a fella like this.... but when it came down to it I just didn't know what to say.

It has put me off waxing Men and I am dreading him re-booking!

 

[nkdlady]

My advice would here be to think very carefully before rebooking this client.

How did he behave after his initial misdemeanor? Did he act perfectly appropriately or were there other actions/behaviours that made you feel uncomfortable? If he acted impeccably thereafter, I guess there is the possibility that he is genuinely misguided about what is acceptable and what's not. However, I would be surprised if that was the case.

If you do decide to rebook him, be very clear with him over the telephone, at the time he makes his next appointment, about what is and isn't appropriate treatment room behaviour and what the implications will be if he makes you feel uncomfortable at any time (i.e. you will end the treatment and leave the room immediately).

Whatever you decide to do, remember at the very least to take the most basic safety precautions; i.e. ensure that another therapist/salon member of staff is close by within your premises at the time of the treatment. We also find, as a salon, that taking a prepayment in full - at the time of booking - for all male intimate clients - deters any timewasters.

Good luck and remember that no therapist should ever find herself in a situation she does not feel comfortable in. Even if you do not wish to rebook him for no other reason than gut feeling then that is what you should do.

 

[Zoelouisefarmer]

Oh my gosh girls! Shouldn't have to feel that uncomfortable!!! X

 

[Jack Dunn]

Don't rebook him ...

Put his contact details into your phone under a code and just ignore his calls and texts.
Sorry it's totally inappropriate and I wax guys all day and have never had a client say that he's been waxed elsewhere with an erection, it's rubbish . On occasions when clients have had involuntary erections it's very difficult to wax and I tend to work on another area while things settle down!

Don't let him destroy your confidence, it's your business so your rules apply...
If clients act in an inappropriate manner or don't respect you then bin them , they are plenty of lovely genuine clients out there.

Good luck

 

[Angie's Nails]

Thank you all so much for your advice and support. I work at home, alone so this kind of behaviour has been worrying me. Having his number on my phone and not answering his calls is a good idea as I hate confrontation. I have a regular guy who I trust impeccably and all others have been ok up until now so I suppose I shouldn't let this guy put me off. Thanks again

 

[Jack Dunn]

Thank you all so much for your advice and support. I work at home, alone so this kind of behaviour has been worrying me. Having his number on my phone and not answering his calls is a good idea as I hate confrontation. I have a regular guy who I trust impeccably and all others have been ok up until now so I suppose I shouldn't let this guy put me off. Thanks again

Angie
You have invested money in your business , your training , you have set up a home salon don't let clients like this knock your confidence. Most clients are great and do not behave in this manner so don't let the few that are upset you.

I have a huge list on my phone of clients that are on my DNS list ( do not see) for various reasons; no shows, timewasters, if they acted inappropriately or whatever reason and for me I find it easier just to ignore the call as someone else will call and book an appointment.

When I first started out working from home even as a male therapist I had the same concerns over personal safety... but always remember you're the one standing with a spatula full of hot wax and I kept a small sledge hammer in the corner of the room. Lol !! Never needed to use I either! I truly believe you go with your gut instinct I have often told a client I was fully booked for the rest if that week while I'm sitting watching countdown!! if I did not like the sound of them or what they were looking for or what I thought they were looking for....

So in the long term it pays to follow your own instinct and if it does not feel right then don't do it. Sadly some therapists who work for employers don't have that luxury... but we do!!
Good luck x