Think Im going to have a breakdown if i continue like this


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CND Education Ambassador Newcastle
Jan 27, 2009
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Hey Geeks im having a really really hard time at the moment and i dont know what to do.

Im busy and making a profit and alot of the time now im too busy which is stressing me out. I've taken on a girl to help ease the pressure a bit but because shes only just started its a bit of another added pressure to some what supervise her.

I have no life what so ever outside of the business and I really want a boyfriend but I feel im coming across really needy or something when Im meeting guys cause they seem to blow hot and cold with me and because i work on my own im most of the time im really really lonely.

I've had huge huge arguments with my mum who i think is just getting the brunt of all my problems

I really dont know what to do anymore I feel like im at an all time low and my self esteem is reciculously low because of it all

Anyones advice would be greatly appreciated
Ok stop and think this through. The problems you describe are called "being a salon owner" and "being self employed". It is lonely and difficult, there is no magic solution. Staff may earn you money but my experience is that it is at the exspense of mental well being. They make you more lonely not less lonely.

Your new salon has not been open long. If you are hating it now, how will you feel in a year? Have you thought about how it can make you happy and work towards that?

I kind of want to shake you and tell you to grow some backbone but I know that advice goes against the spirit of this site.
I think you need to have a good look at what you have achieved and pat yourself on the back.
That is exactly what I need to do. I have people say to me all the time that they cant believe how well im doing and how much i've achieved in such a short space of time.

The problem is that im such a perfectionist that im wanting to see quite a big profit now since i've been doing it for 2 years now x
I've been doing this for nearly 17 years and am still waiting Nikki!!!
Like Persianista says, focus on the POSITIVE! You've accomplished a lot in a short amount of time...celebrate that. Lots of folks would love to be busy, myself included.

Once your employee gets her bearings, you won't have to supervise her and hopefully, you'll have more time for yourself. If you have any friends in the biz, maybe trade services with them. That way, you are taking care of YOU, too! Pampering, so to speak.

As for the boyfriend, we usually find what we are looking for when we stop looking. Crazy but so true. Be yourself, go out when you can, and when guys approach you, SMILE! Be a person that you would want to be with.

I wish you all the best! :hug:
gosh it sounds like you are spending a lot of time on the business and not much on yourself. do you have a day off? what do you do with it? (work i bet).

Look its never easy to change things around but you need to make a bit of time for yourself, stop saying yes all the blinking time and book a day off . (a real one).

then as for men, they can sense a needy person from ten miles and all the ones who like to feed off needy women will be the only ones you will attract.

so, maybe a boyfriend is not the answer at the moment. do you have any friends? anyone you can get back in touch with and say hi? go for a coffee and a catch up?

I think you need a hobby outside the salon, a sport, a pasttime, anything to get you out and about.

you have done so well, you need to step back and focus on your positives and not on things that arent working for you. good things come to those that wait.

sending you hug and friendly non aggressive shake too .

I have a boyfriend and find that he holds me back where my business is involved. I work so hard and he thinks that I should not work when he has a day off. He works sundays so he thinks that I should do,,,, hell no.
We have no end of arguements about it, I have anxierty and I keep saying that a good night out with the girls would help but he thinks I want a night on the pull.

Have sometime off, even if it's a day shopping, spend sometime with friends and try to forget work, as for a boyfriend enjoy being single. I'm 28 and thought time was running out for a guy but if I had my time again I'd enjoy the single life for longer.

Try to chill more which is easier say than done. But look after yourself.
Very good advise from everyone. The main message being stop saying yes to every single booking outside of my normal opening hours which is leading me to be there late every single night and having no life whatsoever.

i went out on saturday night with my best friend and got very drunk and silly and loved every minute of it (well until the hangover this morning that is haha)
yes. its important to strike a work life balance. have a late night if you want to (we do and its always full). after that we are at the salon for 60 ish hours and if they can make it then, oh well tough.

hon, a very dear friend once said to me something and its true. he said " if you stay open till 8 there will always be someone who want you to stay till 8.15. " then one day when you finally say no, they will bugger off to someone else,they wont remember all the times you said yes as a favour." he was right.

you need some R & R hon. we are all entitled to time off!
Ive just logged in and read your post

Like all the other geeks on here, you are lucky to be where you are BUT, you wrote it yourself!!

"I must stop saying yes to appointments outside business hours - why dont you have 1 or 2 late evenings?

That way your happy and clients can be accomadated.

Wittle down your treatment list - do you need to do everything?

As for the b/f dont look and he will find you - old fashioned and corny I know but it works - no guy likes a needy woman and by searching a guy out you come accross as desperate. Be your own woman, be independent and be strong:)

I can sympathise with you about being busy and not striking a work life balance.

have you thought about life coaching. I have discussed many situations with mine and it has helped clarify what I want out of life rather than what I think I want out of life. lol

I know it sounds bizarre but they have a range of tools that help you focus on issues so that you can resolve them but it isnt counselling and being told there there.

Its just a thought. I found one who was training and I was a case study so I managed to get the sessions for free but maybe its something you could consider.