Sorry for your loss, I lost my mum nearly 5yrs ago so I understand what you are going through. Only thing I would tell you is just take it a day at a time, some days will be better than others & allow yourself to have sad times, its a journey & its different for everyone but it does get easier, your memories will make you cry now but one day they will make you smile.
It hurts really bad just now but you only experience this level of loss & pain when we have loved BIG & in my opinion I wouldn't want it to have been less sore because it would have ment my Mum wasn't such a huge loss & been such a wonderful & important part of my life, if that makes any sence.
Hugs S x :Love: