This guy is still making me feel strange!!

[kimbers_81]

Yeah as said at the start of the post we spoke about it and he was cool if I was...Since this text has come through tonight I'm yet to tell my fiance as he is at work! Thats why I came on here to ask you guys....Will defo be getting his opinion tomorrow morning though!

Kim x

 

[kimbers_81]

No problem Weezie I get what your saying and thanks for your thoughts I appreciate it - thats what this site is for :hug:

Kim x

 

[Annie23]

The pictures of you are artistic and beautiful, but we don't know what another persons thinking. Maybe they don't see your website as they are texting, but that doesn't mean that they didn't see your website say "yesterday" took down your details, etc. Lets face it your website is a beautiful design and professional and not one I would imagine to be easily forgotton, regardless of the pictures.

I don't really agree with some of the comments about late night texts in this situation, because 1 - its Friday night and most people class it as a social night and 2 - you have history of nervousness about this client finally 3 - there is a bit of a difference with someone texting my nails are fab to looking forward to my spray tan when you know its been requested as a naked spray tan.

But I don't think it should put you off male clients altogether, just imho ditch this one as he obviously weirds you out!

I think you are right to talk to your Fiance, keep us posted :hug:

anne xx

 

[kimbers_81]

Will do thanks again

Kim x

 

[frankey67]

If you saw a woman in the street and she told you she was looking forward to her spray tan tomorrow naked or not or she sent a text to say the same you wouldnt think anything about it - friday night or not (you may be annoyed at the time of day but nothing more), he may be a lonely person hoping for a reply on a friday night when he should be in the pub with his mates - if you you felt uncomfortable with the last couple of tans then it really isn't worth going back.

Men are probably more nervous of treatmetns on the whole and it's such a shame that they have to be scrutinized in this way because of the way the minority abuse things

 

[kimbers_81]

I was actually comfortable when I spray tanned him last time (that was the first time) its just these weird texts!!

Your right if it was a woman I would have thought nothing more about it except thinking why is she texting me now!

Its not that hes a man its how ''the client'' is being with me male or female...If a female made me feel uncomfortable I'd be straight on here airing my concerns too...

I have nothing against tanning men they are actually easier I tan my fiance all the time and more then happy to tan his gym mates as I feel they have more respect and will not be texting me at 10pm at night with a ridiculous text!

...and if he is lonely then sorry to be harsh but its not my problem. I'm here to offer a professional spray tan service within my opening hours!

Kim x

 

[frankey67]

You know your fiance and his mates so wouldn't feel intimidated by them in the slightest and thats the same with me. I read the post where you listed the texts and actually said WTF when he asked if you were 'mad' at him!! Perhaps this is just nerves on his part and I think that is wat set the alarm bells ringing with you but I think I'd say enough with him cos he has obviously set the alarm bells off - i'd still do men without any predujice but as someone else said be quite short and to the point in any texts.

Another thought - send me on the next one - he'd get a shock when the beauty from the website didn't turn up and that would tell you how serious he was lol

 

[kimbers_81]

To be honest I'm not in the slightest intimidated by men at all!! Just he came across as weird to me!

Your right the whole 'are you mad at me thing' did set alarm bells off!
I have been keeping texts short and to the point and will continue to do this especially with him.

Send you next time...that made me laugh pmsl

Kim x

 

[Annie23]

I was actually comfortable when I spray tanned him last time (that was the first time) its just these weird texts!!

Your right if it was a woman I would have thought nothing more about it except thinking why is she texting me now!

Its not that hes a man its how ''the client'' is being with me male or female...If a female made me feel uncomfortable I'd be straight on here airing my concerns too...

I have nothing against tanning men they are actually easier I tan my fiance all the time and more then happy to tan his gym mates as I feel they have more respect and will not be texting me at 10pm at night with a ridiculous text!

...and if he is lonely then sorry to be harsh but its not my problem. I'm here to offer a professional spray tan service within my opening hours!

Kim x

Well said!!

You know your fiance and his mates so wouldn't feel intimidated by them in the slightest and thats the same with me. I read the post where you listed the texts and actually said WTF when he asked if you were 'mad' at him!! Perhaps this is just nerves on his part and I think that is wat set the alarm bells ringing with you but I think I'd say enough with him cos he has obviously set the alarm bells off - i'd still do men without any predujice but as someone else said be quite short and to the point in any texts.

Another thought - send me on the next one - he'd get a shock when the beauty from the website didn't turn up and that would tell you how serious he was lol

I'm not saying all blokes far from it, but mates of blokes can be notorious for hitting on their mates girlfriends. Obviously this hasn't happend in this case, they have respected her professionalism and her boundaries!

This thread isnt about how kim feels about doing men's spay tans in general, it's about one particular client that happens to be male that kim has a history of feeling uncomfortable about. I remember reading the previous thread.

anne xx

 

[jcpark]

If this was a woman asking these questions you wouldn't think it odd....

Personally, I think he has overstepped the mark and TBH, I would find it odd even if it was a woman. I always try to keep a definate client/therapist relationship, even though friendly, so there is no room for doubt, and I cannot imagine any of my female clients texting me just to say they were looking forward to their next appointment, regardless of what time of day.

I think you have to go with what you feel comfortable with. If you are ok, then as suggested, keep all texts business like and don't reply to these texts. I would take your boyfriend along too. If at any stage you feel uncomfortable about it, then it is not worth it. There are other clients that do not behave like this. Good luck

 

[frankey67]

Hey, I'm 2 mins up the road from you if you want me to go lol

Joking apart, i think you can only judge him from when you met him and how he was with you. If you think he can be a good client and bring something to your business then give him another chance -- just the one! If not then I wouldn't go

 

[kimbers_81]

Thanks Annie23 really felt the back up from you and thanks to jcpark too for your thoughts...I think the topic was drifting abit lol

Thanks so much - Back on track and back in the room lol

Kim x

 

[kimbers_81]

frankey67 don't laugh you could be my replacement yet!! only jokin'

Thanks for your advise too

Kim x

 

[Jaffacake]

Hi, I just replied on your other post before I realised there was a new thread started, I agree with the comments on your website pictures, they could be taken the wrong way even though there is nothing really on show.. if it were me I would change them :hug:

I had a text from a guy telling me I had lovely feet once!! this was when I used to do nails and had pics of nail art on my site... he didnt know they were my feet, he just assumed - and believe me they aren't lovely! lol, they are hobbit feet!! :lol:

There are some strange people in this world...

 

[Meriden]

Hi Kimbers

If you do spray this client again - why not get your boyfriend to go with you and set up for you - That will give him something to think about !!- especially if his intentions are anything other than looking bronzed!!

I agree with the many posts - keep a professional distance. Forget the text- phone him and speak to him directly about your hours of business and politely remind him that you don't answer calls outside of the hours of ------ etc.
Texting can be quite anonymous - people can be brave and wouldn't dare say half the stuff face to face or or on the phone.

I would go with your instincts on this one - you'll probably be right.

I would definately take someone with you as an 'assistant 'though if you do spray him again..

Meriden xx

 

[Jessica Rabbit]

I just wouldn't spray him when he makes you feel so uncomfortable.. good luck on what you decide. x

 

[Warwick Wendy]

Have read thru all the posts about this and I agree with you he does come across as weird! but it may not be in a dangerous weird way, I get guys like this also, In my honest opinion I think he's trying to push his luck to see how you react, By having met you he obviously knows by now that it is you on the website. (love the pics, very arty but I also agree maybe not good to sell your tanning this way) I would consider cropping the pics to not include your face, that way it could be anyone modelling.
If you do want to tan him then set the ground rules with him, say it's not appropriate to text the way you are, once we've agreed on date and time that's all that's needed! and please do not text out of hours. I find that being firm but fair is usually the best way (look at my last weird guy in, he definitely got the message )

If all this doesn't seem to get the message across.....Like someone else said take your fiance in with you.

Or better still train your fiance up real quick, claim you're ill at the last minute and send him in to do the tan.............. you'll soon know if it's about you or the tan

Either way good luck

 

[gillian w]

What i always live by myself and what i drum into my daughter and son for that matter is if something doesn't feel right then usually it isn't.We have these gut instincts and then choose to ignore them or make all kinds of excuses why we choose to ignore them.If you feel something is not quite right with this guy then i would stay well away.
Sometimes it takes one smile at someone for them to become fixated with you as they read all sorts of things into it and once someone gets like that trying to get rid of them can be an absolute nightmare,they can make themselves at the least a nuisance and at worst a danger.

 

[Roxi]

I think he just sounds like a very lonely man actually. I have a (female) client who is the same, I have had texts from her at 3am before. I just ignore them, but she still does it.
Other than the time, I don't think there was anything wrong with his message at all. Perhaps it's just his way of double checking things are still ok with his appointment?
Don't write him off just yet, but if he is making you feel uncomfortable at all then I would reconsider. Hope it all turns out ok

 

[kimbers_81]

UPDATE!! LOL - I must sound like a pain in the backside with this so apologies and thanks to everyone who gave their advise :hug::hug:

Decided to go ahead with the appointment - Took my fiance with me again, we went in separate cars this time as we wanted to see if this guy was just behaving himself as such because he knew my fiance was waiting outside in the car last time!

So, the idea was for him to see me arrive on my own (incase he was outside like last time) and he was again (putting something in boot of his car) I felt this was a good idea so he knew (or thought) I was on my own and wanted to see if he would say or do anything out of turn (with him being naked too) if he thought I was on my own.

My fiance stayed back in his own car until I went in then he pulled forward just behind my car and waited for me.

I tanned him in the garage again! lol but he had made more space for me this time (I knew he was decorating so I guess hes not wanting me to see wallpaper off walls etc! Even though he was happy to go nude - but whatever! lol)

He was fine as he was the first time though he did like just standing there completely naked chatting away to me! No dressing gown in sight!!

Maybe he is an exhibitionist I don't know! I casually mentioned to him about his texts - said something like - you seem very unsure about your appointment once you have made it blah blah blah he just said sorry I just like to make sure....some people are not happy about me wanting a naked tan etc I just told him personally I don't mind, for me its however comfy the customer feels - girls for eg might want to go nude, or just topless or not go topless at all so each to their own.

ANYWAY lol it went fine again but later on that night he text again about 10pm at night (again) saying ''The tan looks great. Thankyou. See u in a couple of weeks. Pleased u didnt mind me being nude.''

I know I must sound like I'm contradicting myself because one min he's freaking me out with these texts then the next min he's more than polite when I tan him!

I think I will put this to bed now as I'll be going round in circles with this one I think lol

Thanks again for everyones input - just wanted to let you know how I got on :hug:

Kim x