New therapist looks moody and making no effort, what shall I say?

[umvemve]

I really think she is just moody lol she has a kind of air about her that thinks she is better than everybody but I have just read that article and it's very interesting and will remember for the future too x

I can also imagine that, lol. Good luck!! Reminds me of a scene in a sitcom that was on in the '80s called No Frills, it starred what's her name who played Nora Batty in Last of the Summer Wine. In one of the episodes she yells at a moody teenager, "OH JUST WAKE UP TO YOURSELF!" in that trade-mark Nora Batty battle-axe way, which seemed to work. If all else fails you could try that.

 

[Lil'Gem]

Again I completely agree with what your saying but I haven't let her know I'm annoyed and again it doesn't mean u have to be rude even if your trying to settle in. Today she told someone she doesn't get emotional and doesn't cry I honestly think its just her and I won't get her to change even with a little pep talk I'm worried it will make an atmosphere insteadofnclearing one x

It sounds like she has said she doesn't cry etc as defense or deflection technique. Sometimes it takes a while to break down peoples defenses so they can just be themselves. She might just be getting a negative vibe from you even if you havent ssid anything. At the end of the day if she is already miserable and you can't sort it out she will probably leave anyhow. If she is just moody and rude then it's a shame, but there is always somebody else waiting to fill her shoes!

Def don't discuss her with clients even in a general way. You may get sucked into a conversation you later regret. Instead just step back and listen. If clients don't like her never fear they will tell you!

 

[Lady Murasaki]

I can't believe that after only 3 days you are condemning this poor girl.

I could understand of this had been going on 3 weeks or 3 months, but 3 days come on give the girl a chance!

You should be pleased that she has control over her emotions and doesn't cry or get emotional, many people don't and waste valuable working hours crying in loos due to bf troubles or falling out with each other over stupid things.

She has come into an already established team of people and is trying to find her place within it which can be daunting at the best of times

This situation doesn't bring out the best in us all and some people can come across aloof, indifferent, moody or rude.

Not everyone is a smiley person, and you took her on knowing she was such a person.

So it's your job as an owner and manager to put some time and effort in to polishing up her people skills and letting her know constructively where she needs to improve.

It is also your job to make her welcome and feel involved, however I do feel that your negativity towards her maybe stoping this happening fully. Other staff will lead by your example on the way you are towards her, please bare this in mind.

I have worked with many new people whom at first have come off as rude and stand offish to begin with but have mellowed within a week or so once they get into the working routine of how things are done and have got to know other staff and clients a little better alone the way.

 

[claire bear]

I can't believe that after only 3 days you are condemning this poor girl.

I could understand of this had been going on 3 weeks or 3 months, but 3 days come on give the girl a chance!

You should be pleased that she has control over her emotions and doesn't cry or get emotional, many people don't and waste valuable working hours crying in loos due to bf troubles or falling out with each other over stupid things.

She has come into an already established team of people and is trying to find her place within it which can be daunting at the best of times

This situation doesn't bring out the best in us all and some people can come across aloof, indifferent, moody or rude.

Not everyone is a smiley person, and you took her on knowing she was such a person.

So it's your job as an owner and manager to put some time and effort in to polishing up her people skills and letting her know constructively where she needs to improve.

It is also your job to make her welcome and feel involved, however I do feel that your negativity towards her maybe stoping this happening fully. Other staff will lead by your example on the way you are towards her, please bare this in mind.

I have worked with many new people whom at first have come off as rude and stand offish to begin with but have mellowed within a week or so once they get into the working routine of how things are done and have got to know other staff and clients a little better alone the way.

I have been far from negative towards her and very welcoming and nice just because I am seeking advice of the best way to handle this situation should not mean I am not doing my job properly
There is a difference between not been a smiley person and been plain rude and ignorant which she is and it's hard to give a full account of a situation on here and can only give snippets for you guys to get a general idea of what I'm on about. The fact I mentioned she told one of the girls she doesn't cry wasn't meant to be a an issue

 

[jacquelineanna]

I do hope this young woman isn't a member or a guest member on this site and reading all of this.

You have discussed it at home. Discussed it on this site. But not discussed one thing with her yet.

Have any of your clients complained about her?

I know you are seeking advice as to how to proceed but it sounds as if you just haven't taken to her.

And because her style isn't your style it's making things difficult for you.

You mention that if you have the conversation she may well decide to look for another job and this would leave you in the lurch as Christmas approaches.

I think she is entitled to look for another job if this is how you feel about her.

It works on both sides. You both have rights.

The fair thing to do would be to have a chat and outline the things that concern you.

Instead of expecting her to deal with this possibly unexpected news straight away, maybe ask her to ponder over-night so she has a chance to consider what you have said and then have another meeting the next day.

I hope you manage to resolve it my lovely without anyone feeling 'less'.

Peace and respect xx

 

[Annemarie]

Mmm it's a difficult situation this one. Here's my two pence worth....
Your running a very succesful salon by the sounds of it and you and your staff all get along nicely which is how it should be seeing as your with each other all the time.
We're all a little nervous when we start a new job when we are trying to fit in and get along with new staff.
Whether this girl has problems or not it should not reflect in her personality at work. If it does which sounds like it is then I'm afraid she's in the wrong job. In the hair and beauty industry you need to have good people skills ( good communication skills) which she doesn't come across as having.
There's times when I've had a bad day, felt Ill, had a row with my oh etc but I put that to one side when I get into work and put my professional head on and smile through even if I'm feeling like crap. She may be good at her job, practical wise, but if she hasn't got good communication skills then that's no good to you or your business. She may put your clients off and make them feel uncomfotable the way she comes accross.
You also have to see it from your clients point of view. Would you like to walk into a salon and be approached by a therapist like this? How would this make you feel? It would put me right off.
As for taking extra long breaks... well sounds like she's taking the p....
She should be impressing the hell out of you if she want's to keep her job.
It's your decision but if I was you I would do what has already been suggested and sit her down for a chat. If she doesn't change and carries on the same way then your salon is not the right one for her and you would be better off letting her go and hiring another therapist who is much more suited to the role. Hth

 

[Annemarie]

It's just a thought. Women with Aspergers can come across as moody and shut down in social situations - although they can be high functioning in other areas - the fact that she is really good technically yet poor socially was what made me wonder. I am so not an expert but having come across one or two people with Aspergers I know how hard they find this sort of thing.

Have a look at this (just in case): My Aspergers Child: Dealing with Aspergers Employees: What Employers Need to Know

She may well have Aspergers but how would you explain this to a client she is treating?
''I'm sorry she's looking so miserable, not very talkative, being rude etc but she has Aspergers.'
Don't mean to sound harsh or sarcastic but that's not a good enough excuse to keep on. What I mean is if she does have Aspergers, she is going to find it hard to communicate with people and potential clients will not understand she has this condition and will be put off.

 

[lozenja]

Personally if I am a client rather than a tech.... I have to chat to people all day and can zone out and enjoy the peace and quiet. Not every client will want the smiles and bubbles. As long as I get a good job done and the person is polite I am happy So it depends if you are thinking of the "team" or the "clients"

Sent from my GT-I9100 using SalonGeek

 

[claire bear]

Personally if I am a client rather than a tech.... I have to chat to people all day and can zone out and enjoy the peace and quiet. Not every client will want the smiles and bubbles. As long as I get a good job done and the person is polite I am happy So it depends if you are thinking of the "team" or the "clients"

Sent from my GT-I9100 using SalonGeek

That's my point she isn't polite x

 

[claire bear]

Mmm it's a difficult situation this one. Here's my two pence worth....
Your running a very succesful salon by the sounds of it and you and your staff all get along nicely which is how it should be seeing as your with each other all the time.
We're all a little nervous when we start a new job when we are trying to fit in and get along with new staff.
Whether this girl has problems or not it should not reflect in her personality at work. If it does which sounds like it is then I'm afraid she's in the wrong job. In the hair and beauty industry you need to have good people skills ( good communication skills) which she doesn't come across as having.
There's times when I've had a bad day, felt Ill, had a row with my oh etc but I put that to one side when I get into work and put my professional head on and smile through even if I'm feeling like crap. She may be good at her job, practical wise, but if she hasn't got good communication skills then that's no good to you or your business. She may put your clients off and make them feel uncomfotable the way she comes accross.
You also have to see it from your clients point of view. Would you like to walk into a salon and be approached by a therapist like this? How would this make you feel? It would put me right off.
As for taking extra long breaks... well sounds like she's taking the p....
She should be impressing the hell out of you if she want's to keep her job.
It's your decision but if I was you I would do what has already been suggested and sit her down for a chat. If she doesn't change and carries on the same way then your salon is not the right one for her and you would be better off letting her go and hiring another therapist who is much more suited to the role. Hth

Glad someone is on the same wave length as me thanks for your advice xxx

 

[Bonkers]

I've read this thread and I believe you haven't given her a chance have you considered that you may wellce across as clicky with your staff and it may be hard got a new member of staff to just fit I'm with you. Maybe things were different at her previous salons maybe you need to mould your staff. Not everyone is happy all the time and why offer her the job in the first place if she was the same at interview she hasn't portrayed a false impression of herself.

Imagine she is reading this she would prob be mortified you have discussed her with the world but not her.


Maybe next time train someone from d watch to your way of running things. I go into salons all the time
Training staff and each and every salon and person is different.


I personally believe you've made your mind up and want rid of her ASAP and as easily as possible and so possibly being picky with her.

Just my thoughts

 

[emsyj]

I do get the impression that your mind is made up about getting rid of her, and that what you're really looking for is validation for your decision. Most of the posters on here seem to agree that you need to have a discussion with her about what you feel isn't going well, but you don't seem receptive to that.

It's your salon so you have to make your own decisions, but since you're asking for advice I would say that part of being a good manager is dealing effectively with people and people issues. In my view, sacking her without tackling the problem makes you just as bad as her in terms of poor communication skills. I think you should put your big girl pants on and deal with it, perhaps take a look at the ACAS guidance on 'Difficult Conversations'. It won't be easy, but you will feel 100 times better when you have done it - and it will make you more confident about managing this type of issue if it arises again in the future.
Challenging conversations and how to manage them - Acas

 

[BABSann]

You really must talk to this person, it is hard talking to staff sometimes about their negatives but as a boss/ manager it must be done.

In my first ever job as a therapist my bosses( there were two of them) were a couple of...... How do I put it? Not very nice people* cough. They were extremely bitchy and one of them in particular would constantly pick faults in the therapists.

I was only level 2 trained at the time, just about to start level 3 but they expected me to do several treatments I had no training in or any understanding in. I was a nervous wreck and I wasn't happy.

We had two staff meetings in which they both told me that I walked around looking miserable all the time I was horrified. Never in my life had I or have I been accused of being a miserable person who rarely smiles.

When I told family and friends they were shocked and said it sounded like they were talking about someone else. But maybe I did have a miserable face on me, maybe the fact I was nervous and uneasy about performing electrical and other treatments on people, when I wasn't trained nor did I have a clue about, was having a profound impact on me.

Maybe your therapist feels uneasy. Maybe she is unhappy and is picking up on vibes and feels sad and lonely. I don't believe its Asperger's syndrome. My best friend has 2 kids with it and they are sticklers for doing things just so, there's no way she would've had extended breaks and the like if she had this condition, because she would've known that was wrong. Also I seriously don't think she would ever have gone into a job like beauty therapy, given that Asperger's people have very autistic tendencies. The two just wouldn't go hand in hand though there's always a first time. I dont mean this in a derogatory way to people with this problem but I do know what my friends 2 kids were like and they're both adults now. I also worked with Asperger's kids in a special needs school years ago.

Hopefully when you sit and talk to her she will open up and explain what's wrong. Ask her how she feels she is doing. Is she happy? See what she says. If she feels ostracised then that could be why she's going off for long breaks. Is she fully competent in all treatments or is it just nails? Does she feel out of her league?

 

[jurate]

I didn't want to comment here first and I haven't read every single reply but now I'm starting to feel I should throw in my opinion if you don't mind...

In my mind I'm very easy going and friendly person, however, as I found out over some time to some people first impression of me isn't what I would want to look like - they think I am very "Proudy" & "above all". In reality I'm very shy, but don't want it to be seen. I try to be nice and friendly but it seems like it takes time for people to warm up to me.

If I were your employee I would definitely pick on your vibes even if you think you are not showing them.
To be honest, it makes me angry that you still haven't spoken to the girl - why listen to what others say to you about her and not talk to her directly?

You are the boss after all, you are a team leader that doesn't seem to be interacting with ALL of your team!

If you get rid of her without talking to her prior, how will she know what she is doing wrong? How will she know where to improve?

Sorry xxx

Sent from my HTC Sensation XL with Beats Audio X315e using Tapatalk 2

 

[PixieBeauty]

Only thing I have to add is when I first started my last job, my manager pulled me up after a short while & said she was putting me on probation because she didn't like my attitude & thought I gave an air of I difference. I could not have been more shocked by what she said, & in reality was quite stressed and trying to keep it together while overall appearing calm!

Sometimes how we feel is not how we come across!!

Just another pov Xx

 

[beautyJen]

Clairebear, this is such a nightmare for you, everybody on here seems to be focussing on this 'poor girl' but its you I feel sorry for. Your salon means so much to you and you have looked tirelessly for a therapist with great skills, you thought youd found one, given her a chance and in return she is giving you very little! It is so stressful for us as managers taking on new staff, and having visited your salon on many occasions I know for a fact that you and your team will be going out of your way to be nice to this girl, and if you are giving off any bad vibes its because she has driven you to it! But i cant imagine for a minute that you are. She should be impressing the hell out of you right now and everyone will agree on that. If after only three days she has made you feel that you have made the wrong decision then this girl is no good! I totally disagree that you are in the wrong to be discussing this on here before talking to her, this site is here to offer advice and support, and you want advice on how to approach it with her, so that's why you started the post! I really hope she improves after you speak to her, for your sake, it's so stressful to have to look for another therapist again. Good luck hunny. Xxx

 

[PixieBeauty]

Clairebear, this is such a nightmare for you, everybody on here seems to be focussing on this 'poor girl' but its you I feel sorry for. Your salon means so much to you and you have looked tirelessly for a therapist with great skills, you thought youd found one, given her a chance and in return she is giving you very little! It is so stressful for us as managers taking on new staff, and having visited your salon on many occasions I know for a fact that you and your team will be going out of your way to be nice to this girl, and if you are giving off any bad vibes its because she has driven you to it! But i cant imagine for a minute that you are. She should be impressing the hell out of you right now and everyone will agree on that. If after only three days she has made you feel that you have made the wrong decision then this girl is no good! I totally disagree that you are in the wrong to be discussing this on here before talking to her, this site is here to offer advice and support, and you want advice on how to approach it with her, so that's why you started the post! I really hope she improves after you speak to her, for your sake, it's so stressful to have to look for another therapist again. Good luck hunny. Xxx

I totally see the OP's perspective on this too.

My first response was how the OP COULD address the issue, if she chose to.

I think it's a real dilemma and depends so much on actually interacting with this therapist. I often think, when reading on SG, how difficult it must be running a salon & managing staff!

Don't want the OP to think there's a clear, definite 'answer', I think it's a tricky one!

All the best Xx

 

[EmJZ]

I've read this thread and I believe you haven't given her a chance have you considered that you may wellce across as clicky with your staff and it may be hard got a new member of staff to just fit I'm with you. Maybe things were different at her previous salons maybe you need to mould your staff. Not everyone is happy all the time and why offer her the job in the first place if she was the same at interview she hasn't portrayed a false impression of herself.

while I agree that it takes time to adjust to being in a new job and finding your place within it and around staff (especially if they are really close/clicky), it doesn't give a reason to be rude to the clients.

I think, if it were me, I would talk to her about it and let her know why I was unhappy. And if things do not change (at least on the client end of things) then it would result in the end of probationary period.

It's a tough decision, but at the end of the day, you (OP) are the one that knows what's right for you and your business.

Good luck. I hope it all works out in the end!

 

[NIX1284]

I can see all points of view here it is hard settling into a new role - your team may be very welcoming but sometimes it's still hard when your the newbie and your thinking everyone knows each other and in there little group you can feel abit of an outsider - I know it's not an excuse as image an personal presentation is everything in this business an she will know that.Out of interest how old is she, is she newly qualified or been working years?? If she's totally new and this is her worst job this could be whys he's a little hostile, her nerves might be taking over.I do personally think it needs to be addressed, could you have a team huddle based on Customer service or getting to know each other like the 2 truth and a lie - it might just be what she needs to get interacting and talking to other staff.

There's no excuse for the breaks situation that def need noting and a warning etc - she may just have lost track of time / not been sure how long she got but she should have made sure she checked if that's the case.

I do feel it needs addressing before you make any decisions an I think you need to e very careful with this one, you don't want I go down the unfair dismissal route, and I personally thi k it would be unfair to dismiss without any verbal/written warnings etc. especially as you say she's a very good therepist and no faults with her work - also you have to think about could he bad mouth your business if you did get rid.

I know you mentioned speaking to customers I do think this coup be positive - I'd be tempted to print off a little servey about the experience treatment and service provided and just tell your customers she's currently on a trial to get the job and would appreciate if they could participate and provide some honest feedback - once you ha e complete them for the day review them and sit down with her and go through them, if any areas are highlighted I.e her customer service/attitude this can be discussed and tackled that way- give her a little time to improve if she doesn't then that's when if think about getting rid

Good luck with this, i feel for you cause it's an hard one - keep us informed on how you get in xxx

 

[NIX1284]

Oops meant first job not worst x