Regrets - I've had a few


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Chatty geek
Jul 10, 2006
Reaction score
Horsham West Sussex
I was mulling over life in general yesterday and started thinking about all the things that happen to us that alters the paths we take in life. You cannot escape your own basic personality but events certainly have a bearing on what course you take.

I, for instance have a quick, sharp tongue, which got me into so much trouble when I was younger. I have managed to keep it under control as I've matured but it still sometimes jumps out and causes trouble:o

First time round, I married a man who I perceived to be strong. He wasn't, he was just a bully and a control freak. I have become a better judge of people just by taking my time and listening to what people don't say.

I couldn't have children, which caused several years of pain. I came to terms with it in the end and it has given me an empathy with those who have difficulties that they struggle to overcome.

I ended up in a career that was fundamentally unsuited to my personailty (accountancy) and although I loved the work and was good at it, I had to suppress my natural behaviour around those I worked with.

My life is now great - not perfect but whose is ? I am happy with my lot most of the time. I wish I was 6" taller, I wish I had met Paul, first time round, I wish my Dad and my brother were still alive, I wish I had found nails sooner and above all I wish I was half my age with the knowledge I have now.

How about you ???
I wish the majority of my life could be changed up until I was 27 (not the biguns - children) From 27, I made more choices based on my previous - dare I say "mistakes" and wants!

Once I got to the ripe old age of 27, I had got rid of my ex husband and met my 2nd hubby :green: and had two littleuns :green:

The thing I wish I could change the most though, is my lack of confidence and I wish I could be more "stroppy" :eek:

However, on the whole, I don't have many regrets about the actions I have personally taken, but do have regrets about the way in which certain people treated me iykwim and wish "I had seen through" them sooner.
i dont really have many , coz i am fortunate to have a decent life :lol:
the only ones i have are from when i was younger - treating my mum bad coz i was "in love " (with a total idiot) and causing her stress which she didnt need coz she was getting over losing my brother
never telling my brother how bright he was or trying to help him more (i was 17 when he died)
thats really about it , i learnt from the things that i did wrong and never went out with a idiot again , ,lol , and always try help people now instead of being a selfish sod :lol:
I wouldn't really call them regrets but there are a few things i would change, basically I wish I knew what I know now at 18, I probably wouldn't have taken the career path I have taken.

This sounds really sad but I feel that in the past year or so I have 'found' myself, I have stopped trying to be who everyone else wants me too be and just been myself, and taken the attitude if people don't like then tough!
I have one regret....Not checking out this site sooner! Im currently 20 years old and have owned my own salon for 2 1/2 years. Im surprised at how many people have so many questions, fears and worries on here. I have had quite a tough ride as a teenager. Leaving school at 15 with no qualifications left me little choice career wise...then low and behold.....i found nails. Now i feel i have found a career i sincerely love to bits! I love coming to work every day and i love my girlies at my shop...we have such a laugh!! So im writing this so i dont regret not writing it everyone who is stuck in a rut working in a salon thats using you for cheap slave labour, get out there and get on your own girls! the world is your oyster!

C xxxxxx

(apologies...i have completely lost the plot this morning anf gone right off the topic xx)
I read this once and although i am not a religious person it just sort of made sense to me...its what i tend to live by.....Its part of the Serenity Prayer.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things that I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I could sit and think about regrets or bad times or even unhappy pasts....but I'd rather sit and think about today... the sun is shining, the love i have in my heart, the love i have for others and what i have...not what i didn't have.
Ive got a few regrets, mistakes Ive made when I was alot younger. From the age of 21, life has been grand tbh, and until this thread I dont really think about the past. I dont think its good to dwell on mistakes and things like that, my mother has always lived in the past and its made her a bitter, argumentative person, who cant move on from anything, she always harps back to what happened years ago, its not nice.

One sort of regret I have is doing a bunch of naff courses that I didnt enjoy, even though Im qualified up to my eyeballs in random things lol! Its quite funny really. I wish I'd have saved to do my Creative courses 10 years ago.

:hug: xx

Good thread though Adele! xx
I read this once and although i am not a religious person it just sort of made sense to me...its what i tend to live by.....Its part of the Serenity Prayer.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things that I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I could sit and think about regrets or bad times or even unhappy pasts....but I'd rather sit and think about today... the sun is shining, the love i have in my heart, the love i have for others and what i have...not what i didn't have.

Great post Bagpuss. You managed to convey what I was thinking beautifully. I try not to have regrets just life and learning expiriences (I have quite a few:):eek:).
Yeah I have regrets, but I try not to think about them as they are past and I can do nothing to change that.

If I dwell on them too much they affect my present and possibly my future and that is something that cannot happen.
I don't really have any regrets (apart from getting in debt). I've buggered up more times than I care to remember but I don't think I've lost or wasted anything:green:.

I've travelled, I've got a lovely husband, I've discovered a career I love and will hopefully make a success of. I've spent the last 18 years in a job that doesn't suit me, like Adele, but I've learnt a lot from it and have made some of the best friends a girl could have.

I wish my mum and dad were still around to see me start my own business. They'd be so proud.
well, i have gorgeous hubby , 3 wondeful talented highly inteligent (dont know where it comes from pmsl) children and a nice house etc, i just wish id made a better choice when i left school, always wanted to do something to do with beauty, but with no support, just faffed around in shops etc, then left work to have kids at 19, so only just found something that means something to me. better late than never tho eh?

the only major regret i have is not being more insistent over the birth of my second son, i knew i was right but let the doctors shush me, and consequently we lost him, so i often spend time reflecting on the only time i shut my big gob up and look what happens, hence why i am such a mouthy git now lol, never again will i not voice my opinion, if im wrong tough, id rather be wrong than full of regret.

on the whole, i try not to do what ifs, theres so damn many of them in my life, with choices made, health etc, it would depress me even more, i love angies little poem, makes perfect sense

nicky xxxxxx
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.

I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
I haven't got any regrets with any choices that I've made in life. I've been lucky and things have usually worked out for the best and I'm really blessed with my family.
The only thing I do regret is losing my brother and that obviously wasn't my choice.
I have a lot of what if's etc, but I don't think about them, when I think of the past I automatically think of the good things that have happened.
For some reason I live for the day, maybe it has something to do with my Dad saying "what's done is done, get on with the rest of your life."
no regret as such .... i intend coming back when i'm finished in this life do do it differently once again. If I don't (or can't) aaaaah well !!!
While your living your learning!... and what don't kill ya makes you stronger:)
I deeply regret not being honest with my family and marrying my ex husband to keep everyone sweet.....As it happened when I finally did come clean the response was far WORSRE than expected!! However I could have saved myself years of torment and lies had I done it earlier!!

Its funny it depends how you look at things, I could say I regret not getting my head down at school leaving wih some qualifications etc but then its all our "life experiences" that make us who we are today. My life has certainly not been angelic and picture perfect but I am proud of who I am today, how far I have come and what I have achieved in life, I have 2 gorgeous well grounded children (who even eat fruit without being asked!!) a gorgeous true true soulmate, I have my own business, a nice home and (thank god) I am finally coming to an age where I actually understand myself!!! I know who I am I dont want to be anyone else and I think I am pretty cool (god dammit!!)
This is a question I've asked myself many times... and for me, what it comes down to is this:

If by regretting, it means I would go back and change something if I could.. then my answer is a vehement NO:!:

Changing one small thing would alter everything....... and.... I love my girls, I love my hubby, I love my new career. I wouldn't change ANY of that, not for all the millions in the world. Each moment is precious and dear to me.

Also, history is what makes me who I am. My life has been a veritable soap opera... and although I accept I have flaws and would like to improve as a person (we all need improving on something)... I like who I am and don't want to be any different.. flaws and all. And there are those that know my history VERY well, in all it's ugliness... and question my sanity with regards to my answer to this question.
Were my history any different....I would not be the same.

So, to answer the question "do I have any regrets?"?
NO because all that is good and all that went wrong, the mistakes, the triumphs.. all brought me to where I am now and make me who I am.

I'm happy with the status quo.
VERY happy.:green:

why waste energy on regrets? I could sit for hours and wonder what if, blah blah... Not worth it. Things are good, why regret?

Just my 2cents worth
Never regret anything you've done. Just those things you never did but wish you had.:hug:
Better to regret something you did - Than something you didn't do!

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