Constructive Advice Or Unkind Criticism?

[~Emmsybabes~]

Time for my go lol

I often don't comment (or offer critique) on someones pictures even if they have asked for it !!!
Because although I am not one of the most experienced geeks, I think I DO have a very picky eye...
So If I feel that a geek is proud of their work but I can see something that can maybe be improved, I feel really bad saying so..

I really want to, because I can see that with that little bit of refining or a bit of a pinch...etc... that set will be even better looking than it was to begin with,
But then I am worried that people may think I am just being nasty or something.

Sometimes I know exactly what to comment on, but can't word it well, so end up deleting my comment,

I would love to be able to think that we could all critique without fear,
as you only have to look at some of my earlier sets compared to some of my more recent ones to know that helpful critique WORKS !!!

I always listen when advice is offered to me, I would never brush off anyone's comments, because a little bit of this and that all helps in the long run,

I still have off days and sets of nails that I think OMG how rubbish do they look...I don't post for critique often as mentioned..I would post because I would know something wasn't right...But as lovely as all the very kind comments are, (and I really really do love getting them, it keeps you wanting to do more )
But they don't help me assess my problems
(I feel bad saying that, in case it puts anyone off saying they like peoples work lol)
Only VERY occasionally will someone come along to offer proper advice...and then I go and follow it.

It is a tricky one, because we need the critique to help us improve,
But the lovely comments are nice to receive too.

 

[Katelisa]

It is a tricky one, because we need the critique to help us improve,
But the lovely comments are nice to receive too.

critique seems to be the opposite of "if you cant say anything nice don't say anything at all" lol.

it is nice to have lovely comments, but maybe constructive lovely comments are more helpful. ie "very nice, your smiles are really crisp and consistent"

same as we would if we were critiquing, we wouldnt just say "they're a bag of pants" we would justify the answer.

 

[Kim Lawless]

Sorry, but have I hijacked a nail thread by mistake?

Start the car! :Kissing:

 

[1999judy]

Sorry, but have I hijacked a nail thread by mistake?

Start the car! :Kissing:

Engines runnin...jump in :lol:

 

[~Emmsybabes~]

critique seems to be the opposite of "if you cant say anything nice don't say anything at all" lol.

it is nice to have lovely comments, but maybe constructive lovely comments are more helpful. ie "very nice, your smiles are really crisp and consistent"

same as we would if we were critiquing, we wouldn't just say "they're a bag of pants" we would justify the answer.

Yup of course !
sometimes its post after post of "they are lovely" "beautiful" etc...
If there is something that needs to be fixed then none of these comments are helping the poster pick up on it and learn to rectify it.

I think in my post It may have came across as me thinking critique is totally different to positive comments,
This isn't what I am saying, Just that a beautiful set of nails can still have smiles too low, this may spoil the whole look, or The design may be beautiful but the canvass not so good iykwim.

So to say something positive, but still adding the points that could do with rectifying Imo is good.

Katelisa Your comment is a good one to remember and I for one will use it,
Instead of posting just "lovely" to also say WHY you think the nails are lovely...
Then others reading (newbies etc) will then pick up on what to aim for..
And the poster knows what to keep doing ..

I remember when I first started looking at sets of nails and thinking OMG they are amazing, They could be the most basic
set of pink and whites...but to me they were something I was in awe of, and never thought I would have been able to do.
This kept me thinking of how I needed mine to look


Ooooo The kids have been doing my head in, and I have made a brew, I have completely forgot what I was on about, and reading back what I have written I am confused hahaha,
am I making sense to anyone lmao :green:

 

[Jeni Giles]

It's very nice to get flattering comments but if I have gone wrong somewhere it is helpful to know exactly where and would never take offence to constructive critisism....that's why I usually ask Ant....he's brutally honest:lol:
We learn by the remarks people make...for example on the last comp on the site I was told my fingers looked wrong...it was because I did the nails on myself and struggled to take the pic....so next time I'll ask someone else to take the pic as my fingers DID look distorted.
So that is why we need constructive critisism.
See the pic and you will see what the comment meant.

I don't post pics of my own work very often, but you can critique me anytime, good or bad...I've learned that green isn't THE color on your side of the pond, but have created quite a buzz around town (brought in new clients who were attracted to the art- not a bad thing) but I can't ask my students do something if I'm afraid to try it myself. Trust me some of the comments here are mild when you hold compare them to a critique from a student!!LOL

Great thread Mrs C.

I too was only thinking about all of the characters and great advisers that have now gone from the site. We can all do the dance of the seven veils around the reasons why, but from what I've been told, they're just sick of the bitchiness by a small group of people on here and sick of being pounced on whenever someone doesn't agree with what's been said.

Even sadder in my books are the less confident geeks who never post because they are frightened of exactly that. This is fact as they've told me so. xxx

I know if I "lurk" long enough and ignore the toads, I get to find the princes. At some point this group will move along and find someone else to irritate. I can always get a chuckle out of them, can you imagine how horrible their personal lives must be that it has to overflow on to a site like this. I'm greatful my life isn't so stressful!!

 

[hayls]

I havent bothered to post my stuff in Critique before, god knows why, but.........I do see the nails that go in there and sometimes comment myself, I dont see the point in the person being told, 'fab nails' when they obviously are not!

I dont like to really critique peeps, as Id prefer not to get anones back up, so I just dont bother posting at all!

Am I a chicken??:lol:

 

[Zingara]

I dont like to really critique peeps, as Id prefer not to get anones back up, so I just dont bother posting at all!

Am I a chicken??:lol:

No, hunny, your not - (rather sadly) I think thats normal nowadays. And I think its a reflection of the current culture we live in, not just this site. Everyone has been made to be so paranoid about offending or discluding anyone.

Unfortunately it does mean that we'll have a generation behind us that will never be able to cope with disappointment, will cry discrimination (of any kind - race, class, sexual, age, whatever.....see even I'm worried about missing anyone out or picking on any one kind!) everytime something doesn't go their way and will never be able to joke about going to the "school of hard knocks"...."school of soft pillows and cushions" more like!

 

[hayls]

No, hunny, your not - (rather sadly) I think thats normal nowadays. And I think its a reflection of the current culture we live in, not just this site. Everyone has been made to be so paranoid about offending or discluding anyone.

Unfortunately it does mean that we'll have a generation behind us that will never be able to cope with disappointment, will cry discrimination (of any kind - race, class, sexual, age, whatever.....see even I'm worried about missing anyone out or picking on any one kind!) everytime something doesn't go their way and will never be able to joke about going to the "school of hard knocks"...."school of soft pillows and cushions" more like!

Thanks Lyndsay, thats it Im getting tough! lmao! I also feel like Im unable to criticise incase somebody says, 'how can you say that, look at your work' you know!
I do agree that people need to listen to positive criticism, it'll make them a better tech, when they can correct flaws, but I guess some guys dont want to be told their work has flaws, do they!?!

 

[VHunter]

BUMP

Important food for thought for everyone.


:hug:

 

[gillian w]

I dont think i have ever posted on critique at all.Maybe it should be called your opinions rather than critique.I dont like nails to look anything other than natural and i mean in shape and thickness not colour or art so my critique is judgemental from the start .
I like the look where you do not actually know whether the nails they have are just well manicured or are enhancements.

 

[nailzoo]

I dont think i have ever posted on critique at all.Maybe it should be called your opinions rather than critique.I dont like nails to look anything other than natural and i mean in shape and thickness not colour or art so my critique is judgemental from the start .
I like the look where you do not actually know whether the nails they have are just well manicured or are enhancements.

I couldn't have worded it better (and I can't be bothered retyping it )

I'm often accused of being abrupt (or misinterpreted), that's because I often cut to the chase and use 5 words rather than 35 to explain myself, soften the blow and massage someones ego at the same time (which unnecessarily includes the words) "no offense" ..... when none is intended from the get go.

I'd love to give pats on the back .... but really some need a kick up the ass, or a reality check, just to draw attention to a finer detail and often there is no subtle way to say it.

My fingers get enough workout from doing nails without having to overuse them for unnecessary words (although I have done it in this post already).

 

[mely-bely]

Great thread! I think one of the biggest issues is that the typed word is open to the readers interpretation. If I am in a pissy mood, the info I read with be put in a negative light regardess of the content. Also, when people ask for advice, they often feel vulnerable and can misinterpret the information and tone given. I have done that myself, felt like I had been given a hand slap for something I had posted - but I didn't let it bother me. I am learning more every day and my opinion is just that, mine. People don't have to agree with me, that won't hurt my feelings at all!

There are a few people on this site that tend to "go off" occasionally - but mostly its just fantastic!

 

[nora525]

I don't think that it is so much the need to be padded. I think it is more the form of communication we have.
we are all at the different levels in our communications. For example, I am not English and english is not my first language. sometimes I accidently say things that someone might consider offensive or patronising. when you don't see the other person, it is hard to think sometimes what do they mean, ecspecially if you know that you are stuggling with something. I think every nail, hair or skin geek has a bit of perfectionist in them, there must be, because we all see our thing as a form of art. Who produces the best hair ups, the prettiest nails and so on.... When the perfectg is not so perfect, well we all react in the different way , but I do believe that after passing teh initial shock, we do take onboard the things that have been said.